Lunar Eclipse
by TaintedDarkInuShemeeko
Summary: Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third...
1. Dark Abyss

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Chapter 1: Dark Abyss**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

___________________________________________________________________________

"_Bella, my family and I, we're leaving Forks."_

_What Edward had said wasn't all that surprising knowing Edward had said they would have to leave one day. There was only so much time before someone picked up on the fact that none of them seemed to be aging; I just never thought it would be so soon. They hadn't been here that long, had they? _

"_Ok, um, well, let me grab something real quick." It was there in that moment I realized how dead his eyes looked. I tried not to think about the reason behind his cold stare. As long as we were together nothing else mattered. Turning to run toward my house, the words Edward said made me stop._

"_No, Bella, you're staying here with Charlie. You're not coming with us."_

_There was no hiding the disbelief in my words as I spoke, "What? No! Edward, no! We can't be apart. I can't live without you__! You__ know this."_

_The set of his jaw and the coldness in his eyes chill__ed__ me to my bones._

"_You don't…want…me anymore__?__" __I said finally comprehending the meaning behind his cold and distant behavior from the last few days. My body went numb and I had to force myself to breathe as I spoke. If my face showed any signs of a loss of color; Edward didn't seem to notice like he usually did._

_I thought he would at least look away from me__, but__ his cold glaze however never broke once._

"_No, I don't. You were just something for me to fill my time with. There was nothing more to it; just the imagination of a silly girl."_

_My voice broke as I tried to speak, "No, you don't mean that."_

"_Yes, I do, Bella. Go be human. I'm tired of pretending to be something I'm not. It will be as if I was never here. Just promise me you won't go do anything reckless. Goodbye, Isabella Swan."_

I had only made it a few steps from where Edward and I had been standing, before the reality of what had just happened sunk in. I found myself gasping for air as a panic attack closed in on me. My body grew numb before my legs refused to support me any longer.

After everything we had been through, how could he do this? He promised he would never leave me.

Edward was my love, my life, my meaning for living. All I had left now was my cold, dark abyss.

As I lay down on a bed of wet decaying leaves, something dawned on me: Edward had rejected me. His leaving shouldn't have been surprising to me. Edward's love for me never made any sense. I was human and Edward wasn't -- he was so much more. I was a plain pane of glass and he was a beautiful piece of sculpted marble. I never understood how he could love someone as ordinary as me. I knew that I would most likely never find an answer to that.

I'm not sure how long I lay there in the dirt among the moss and leaves. I vaguely remember getting up and stumbling through the rain and back out of the forest toward home or at least what use to be home. I wasn't sure if it could even be home again without Edward. He had become my home.

After the night when Edward left me, time lost all meaning. I was stuck in that moment while the world continued to move around me. It was as if Edward had ripped my heart out of my chest, taking it with him. I went through the motions of school, cooking, and homework to make Charlie believe I was moving on with life. Jake tried to come and see me, but I wouldn't see him. Charlie even invited them to dinner one night. I had to make it look like I was eating, to make them happy. None of it really mattered to me anymore. I was a lifeless puppet, and my father and friends were the marionettes. I did whatever they wanted me to do.

Night was when I suffered the most. It was when the nightmares would start. Every time I fell asleep it was the same thing: he would look at me with that cold look in his eyes right before he would slowly start to walk away from me. He would spout words of how foolish we were and that his leaving was for the best. And every night I would wake up screaming, my cries echoing through the house.

Night after night it would continue until the pain in my chest started to numb my whole body.

I was a hollow shell now, incomplete without my reason to live. He had been my every thing He had told me once that I was his sole reason to live in this world; so why was, it I was the one breaking apart and he had moved on without me? Even if he had been able to throw me away, I couldn't do the same thing. I wasn't that strong. Edward was my other half. Couldn't anyone else see that? How could I live without having all of me? My breathing hitched inside my throat, my vision became blurry as hot tears started to build in my eyes. I hated him right now. He had opened a new door to life and love for me, only to slam it shut on my face.

Then on one late stormy night I was awakened by the crack of thunder. Tears were streaming down my cheeks. I was thankful for the thunder; at least Charlie couldn't hear me screaming.

But this time the nightmare had been different. It was my birthday all over again. Only this time when Edward shoved me, it wasn't to protect me from Jasper, it had been to keep me away from him. When I looked down at my chest, there was the huge hole in my chest where my heart should have been.

I sat there for several minutes doing my best to muffle my tears. Once I had myself breathing normally. I threw my covers off and climbed out of my bed and toward my desk where I then started to write a letter. It was the only way I knew how to get a hold of Alice. The cell phone number I had was no longer current. Edward had said that Alice could see the future based off of a person's decision, so I could only hope she would see my letter. I was angry at Edward for leaving me. He wanted me to move on, but I was damaged goods. Who would want me now? I was broken inside and the only other people I knew who could help fix me had left with _him_.

I had no clue where the Cullen's were right now but I knew without a doubt that Alice would see my letter.

**Alice POV**

It had been two months since we had moved from Forks. Those two months were like torture for me and for my whole family, especially Edward. He had been the one to sentence us to this dark abyss. It was punishment for Edward lying to Bella about how he felt about her. And we all had to suffer for his mistake. He didn't even let us say good-bye.

I wrapped my arms around myself, as if the action would warm me. My topaz-colored eyes stared at the storm that was brewing outside, mirroring how I was feeling on the inside -- cold and miserable. I knew without even looking at him that Jasper was worried about me. It was in his eyes every time he glanced up from his book to look at me. He however, just continued to flip through his book on the Civil War.

It was quite inside. Carlisle was skimming through a new medical journal. Esme was knitting a blanket or maybe a sweater. Our actions held no deeper meaning, we were just trying to find things to bide our time. No laughter filled the room like it did when Edward would play the piano for Bella. There was no merriment, all the happiness we had found withered and died the day we left Forks.

The trance that I fall into when I have a vision is all too familiar, but nothing could have prepared me for what I saw. It was a vision of Bella, but it wasn't the Bella of my memories. A strangled cry escaped my lips at what I saw. Her skin was paler and she was much slimmer then I remembered her to be. Bella was merely a shadow of the one I remembered. The dark circles under her eyes mirrored the ones that were under Edward's.

As I moved into my vision more, I could see that she was writing a letter. The bones in her wrist were defined as she wrote. Despite her weakened appearance, her words conveyed the heavy emotional burden she was forced to carry.

_Dear Alice,_

_I miss you. I'm lost without you guys. I can't even dress myself right. I put my shirt on backwards yesterday. I know, he told you not to look for my future. He probably told you not to contact me. _

_But I don't care. I'm drowning here Alice. I need my best friend. I need the Cullens in my life. I need all of you. _

_Love, _

_Bella_

She was writing a letter to me. The sadness in the last part of her letter ripped me apart inside.

"_But I don't care. I'm drowning here Alice. I need my best friend. I need the Cullens in my life. I need all of you. "_

I tried to shake the image of how skinny Bella had become from my mind. It wouldn't budge. Bella looked over her shoulder as she paused her writing allowing me to see how lifeless and dull her eyes had become. Just like Edward's. I should have known what our leaving would do to her. My eyes stung with the tears I could no longer shed. The moment I saw the hollow shell that was now Bella, I wanted to grab a hold of Edward and shake him. I wanted answers from him. Why did he have to leave her the way he did? He could have stayed and Jasper and I could have left. That however wasn't what Edward had decided was _best_ for us.

There was something else that I needed to know. Why was it that everyone else seemed to just go along with what Edward had decided when it was so wrong? Then I had the bitter realization that I had been just as cowardly as the rest of my family. I didn't have the courage to stand up to Edward and say no. But I would no longer stay silent. I couldn't after seeing how Bella was wasting away.

The sound of Jazz's worried voice pulled me from my vision of the shadow that had once been my friend.

"Alice, what is it? What did you see that has you so upset? Is it Edward?"

One word was all I could say. One word said so much.

"Bella"

I didn't look at Jasper. I couldn't even though I knew he could feel what I was feeling. Looking him in the eyes, would have been like shoving a hot poker into a wound. No matter what we said to him, Jasper still hadn't forgiven himself for what had happened with Bella two months ago. Instead I turned quickly to look at Carlisle and Esme. My words were a plea for them to take action.

"She's dying without him. She's not living, she's just barely existing, if you can call what I just saw that. How could he do that to her? How could he do that to himself, to us?" I couldn't hide the horror I felt at seeing clearly the result our choices had on Bella.

The confused and worried looks of Carlisle and Esme caused me to pause. Could I really tell them what I saw, what I had been seeing over the past two months but hadn't shared with them? If Edward knew that I was still seeing Bella's future, he would only accuse me of purposely looking for her future. In truth I really wasn't looking for it, but it was always there. In fact, I would see Bella just as many times as I would Edward.

"She doesn't sleep; her eyes are sunken and lifeless. She hardly speaks to anyone. The worst thing is she's not eating. She's giving up because he threw her away. Edward gave up and he made us come along for the ride. I don't care what he wants anymore. He's not here, he's in Rio living a shadow of a life just like Bella is and I can't take it!" The words rushed from my mouth as I couldn't contain the emotion behind them anymore.

"Alice," Carlisle voice was firm, yet I could hear the hurt in it as well.

"I'm sorry Carlisle, if Edward can be selfish so can I. I don't want to go back to Forks for a funeral. I don't want to have a vision of them putting her in a box and lowering her into the ground. If that happens we won't just lose Bella, we'll lose Edward too."

'_Nothing will stop me from coming to you Bella, nothing. If I lose you I just might lose my whole family with you.'_

Just as I was about to go grab a bag and head for Forks, another vision hit me full force.

**Bella POV**

I had just finished the letter when there was a knock at the door.

"We need to talk Bells." My father's voice sounded strained and tired.

"Just a sec, Dad." I hoped my voice didn't sound nervous or scared as I flipped the letter over and covered it with my worn copy of _Wuthering Heights_.

I couldn't let Charlie see how unkempt I was when I was by myself. My hair was a mass of brown tangles; the neck of my old blue sweat shirt was stretched, so much that it slipped over one of my shoulders. The knees in my pants were torn and tattered.

A small snort of disgust came from me when I wondered, what would Edward think of me if he could see me right now? Would he be as disgusted with me as much as I was with myself? Or would he be torn with grief and hate for himself knowing he had been the cause of my distress? Would he care at all?

For one second I thought I saw a faded image of him looking at me with dark sad eyes.. He always seemed to have the weight of the world on his shoulders. The second I took a step forward the image disappeared.

Remembering that Charlie was outside my room waiting on me, I shook the thought of him from my head for the moment. Hastily, I grabbed my brush and pulled it through my tangled mane in one quick pull. After that I twisted a ponytail holder through it.

"Ok, you can come in. What do you want to talk about Dad?"

Charlie had his _uneasy face_ on. It was the face he wore when he had something difficult to talk about.

Charlie shifted his weight from one leg to the other before he sighed at me. "I've been talking to your mother, Bells. And we both have agreed that you should move to Jacksonville and live with her and Phil."

What I thought was just going to be a talk looked like it was going to become an argument. A knot formed in my throat and before I knew it I was standing in front of Charlie yelling, "No, I'm not leaving Forks! Forks is my home and I'm not going." I was desperate for him to understand something I knew he couldn't.

"Yes, Bella, you are going to go! I can't stand this anymore!" Charlie boomed.

But then he softened. He blew out a big breath of air before continuing. "It's like part of you died when they left and you're just waiting to die. I can't handle it anymore. Get a bag packed, I'm taking you to the airport in the morning. And that is final, Bella."

I wanted to tell Charlie that he was right. A part of me did die when Edward left me, and I was just waiting to die. What was the point of living if the person you had given your heart to didn't want you? I felt no more important than trash. To Edward, I was disposable.

+ In the awkward silence that followed, Charlie again shifted his weight. He reached out like he wanted to hug me and then stopped. "I feel like I'm going to lose you Bella, that's all."

"I'm going to be fine, Dad." How sure I was about my words I didn't know.

Charlie turned and headed toward the door. He paused as he turned the knob, letting a sigh escape his lips, "Well, alright, but that doesn't mean you're not going. Goodnight Bells." Turning away from the door, I wanted nothing more than to throw myself into bed and pray that I would die before morning. But even in despair, I couldn't escape my clumsiness as I stubbed my big toe on one of the floor boards. I fell to the floor to grab my toe. While I stifled a cry and a barrage of curse words, I looked for the offender. The floor board was lifted up, how had I not noticed it before?

Curiosity over why the board was even popped up had me getting down on my knees. So I set out to try and pull the board up. It took me six tries before it suddenly popped out of place sending me tumbling backwards.

What I saw beneath the board stole my breath from me. There tucked away, but not gone, were the plane tickets Carlisle and Esme had bought me for my birthday. Along with every photo I had of Edward and the rest of the Cullens. Then, overjoyed, I saw the most precious gift I had ever received: the CD he had made me.

How had they gotten there? It was then I remembered Edward's words:

"_It will be like I was never here."_

Edward had done this; he had hidden everything, thinking that without the tangible proof of his existence, I would move on. How foolishly simple minded of him. Did he really think that just because I was human it would be that easy? I felt the hole in my chest pull as if it where widening more. It was agonizing to realize he had thought it would be so simple.

After pulling everything out of Edward's hiding place, I noticed a square blue velvet box. I didn't remember this being one of my gifts. With trembling fingers, I weakly pulled the box open. Inside was a large sterling silver heart on a delicate chain with the words _Edward Cullen & Bella Swan We Are One _engraved on it.

For the first time in fourteen weeks I felt renewed hope flutter through the hole in my chest. Two things were clear to me now. I had been a fool and Edward had lied about how he really felt about me. He did love me! This engraved necklace was proof of that. It was everything that I wanted. The necklace was a sign that he felt the same way as I did; the simple fact that we were complete when we were together and incomplete when we were apart.

Filled with energy and determination I hadn't felt in a while, I swooped to the other side of my bed and grabbed my backpack. I then began stuffing as many things in it I could starting with the tickets, then the photos, and finally every stitch of clothes I could fit in it. I slipped the velvet box into my pocket, and swung my bag onto my back.

My finally act was to scribble a note to Charlie.

_Sorry Charlie,_

_I never intended to hurt you; just like I never planned to stay in Forks. So I'm leaving__. You__ and mom won't have to worry about my teenager issues anymore. Not sure where I'm going. There is no way I'm going to Jacksonville, so this is better._

_Love you,_

_Bella_

There wasn't a single lie in my letter. I had no idea where the Cullens were. I did my best to remember all of the different places that Edward had talked about possibly moving to. That's when it came to me, Alice and Edward both had said something about a city in New York named Ithaca. So New York was going to be where I started my search first.

Running to the window, I slid it open and dropped my bag out of the window to the ground below. Getting my footing in the tree I climbed out the window and down the tree; with much less grace then Edward or Alice.

I was twelve blocks from my house when I pulled my phone from my pocket. I then dialed a number I hadn't dialed in a long time. Thunder rumbled in the distance, as the clouds parted giving the moon a view of what lay below it. I did my best to calm my breathing as I quickened my paced. Each ring of my phone seemed louder then it really was. The minute I heard Jessica's tired voice on the other end, I out the breath I had been holding. My eyes glanced down at the photo of Edward I had clutched in my hand.

'_I'm not giving up until I find you.'_

"Bella? Is that you? It's one fifteen in the morning! What do you want?"

"I need a car, Jess."

"What?"

"I'm leaving Forks and I need a dependable car. Is your old silver sedan still for sale? I have two hundred dollars I can pay you for it."

The line was silent for a minute.

"Whatever, Bella. The keys are in the ignition."

The line went dead after that.

When I got to Jessica's I was surprised to see her standing outside in her robe. I approached her wordlessly and was about to hand the money for the car to Jessica when she shook her head.

"Keep your money, Bella; I don't want anything from you. The tank is full already. The title to the car is in the glove box, all you have to do is sign it. My parents will just think that I already sold it. Ever since the baby came they hardly know I'm here."

I felt like I should have said something to lift her spirits. An image of my dad flashed inside of my head. Was this how Charlie felt? What about Jake and the rest of my friends. From Jessica plight I was finally able to have a glance at what I had put all of them through. I gave Jessica a weak smile before opening the door and sliding in.

"Thank you, so much Jessica. I owe you one. I'm sure things will get better soon." My words left me feeling like I owed her more, but I couldn't take the time now. I would just have to hope that Angela would be there for her since I couldn't be.

How was it I could tell Jessica that things were going to get better for her soon, when I couldn't tell myself that?

I drove out of the town of Forks as fast as I dared with no intention of returning to this town unless I had Edward by my side. He had left thinking I would move on but there was no moving on without Edward. He completed me. I wouldn't stop until I found him. He couldn't just capture my heart and then decide to leave and set it free thinking it would return to me. My heart was his now and it wouldn't ever belong to anyone else.

I glanced up at the moon as it sent its silver light down over everything. It only served to remind me how much I needed him.

'_Edward was my world, my moon. Now all I have is a lunar eclipse.' _

I glanced into my rearview mirror, saying my goodbyes to my life there for now.

**Alice POV**

Just as I was about to go grab a bag and head for Forks, another vision hit me full force. At first the vision I saw didn't alarm me. Bella had literally stumbled across all the things Edward had hidden from her. But the images I saw next really took me by surprise. It was something I thought I would never see. Bella was running away for from Forks. I could tell by her quicken pace, Bella intended to come back to Forks with Edward or not at all. I noticed that she was clutching a piece of paper in her hand. A second later as she looked down at it and I could see it was a picture of Edward. Even though Bella's body still looked weak from the emotional and physical strain of the last couple of months, I saw a spark of life in her doe-colored eyes.

I saw images of Alaska, Italy and Paris flutter through my head. Suddenly a surer decision flashed inside my mind's eye. Bella was coming here to Ithaca to find us. She had also cemented her decision not to come back to Forks until she had found us.

As another image flicked by, I pulled in a breath. There was a heavy down pour where Bella was travelling. I was horror struck as the Sedan she was driving slid on the wet road. The vehicle vaulted over a bridge and into the icy, black water below. In Bella's current condition, there was no way she would survive. She had just lost too much weight. The water would freeze her in seconds instead of minutes.

Once the images had faded and I snapped back to reality, I knew I had to get moving if I had any chance to stop what I had seen from happening. I wasn't sure I could do it without my family's involvement, but I would act alone if I had to. I wasn't about to lose my best friend, and little sister; even if she was a fragile human.

Now there was one future that was clear: if Bella died, it would be the end of Edward.

Of that much I was very sure.


	2. The Sky Won’t Fall Forever

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to make this choice for her? Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. She goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time:**_

_**Alice POV**_

**_Since the image was clearer than before, I knew that she was closer to us. I was horror struck as the Sedan she was driving slid on the wet road. The vehicle then vaulted over a bridge and into the ice water. In Bella's current condition there was no way she would survive._**

**_Once the images had faded and I had snapped back to reality, I knew I had to get moving if I planned to stop what I had seen from happening. I wasn't all together sure I could do it without my family's support, but I was going to try._**

**_I wasn't about to lose my best friend, and little sister; even if she was a fragile little human. There was one future that was clear. If Bella died, it would be the end of Edward. That much I was very sure of._**

**&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&**

**Chapter 2: The Sky Won't Fall Forever**

_By TaintedDarkInuShemeeko_

**Alice POV**

**Taking out my phone, I dialed Bella's number, but my call went straight to voicemail, forcing me to leave a message. I did my best to keep my breathing calm and regular. I didn't want my family to know how upset I was. Why wasn't Bella answering her phone? I needed to warn her. I needed to keep her safe. Not just for my own selfish reasons, but for my family's wellbeing. For the first time, I knew what our future would be without having to actually see it. Bella was the glue that held this family together, and that glue was crumbling. Vision or not Bella needed me and I wasn't going to leave her in the dark. **

**Jasper looked over at me with curious eyes. He never questioned me out loud; he walked over to me and kissed the top of my head. Words were never really needed between us; we just always knew what the other needed. It however, wasn't Jaz who spoke next, but Carlisle.**

**"What can we do to help, Alice?"**

**I was silent for a second before I answered Carlisle knowing the weight of the request I was about to make.**

**"Carlisle, I was hoping you'd come with me. I think I'm going to need you in order to bring Bella back safely."**

**I watched as Esme squeezed Carlisle's hand, seeing the love that was there between the two of them. I then looked over at my Jaz. There was pain burning in his eyes. He had something to say but seemed unsure of it at first.**

**"Alice, I want to go with you too, but I don't know if I can do it. I'm not sure if enough time has passed, since I…" **

**There was no need for Jasper to say any more, we all knew what he meant: had enough time passed since the night he attempted to attack Bella. I wasn't completely comfortable with his request, but I didn't want him to be discouraged. I took Jasper's hand in mine and gave it an affectionate squeeze. I loved my Jazzy; with all my heart- he completed me. But, without Bella and Edward, I would be missing an important part of myself that Jasper alone couldn't fill. **

**Carlisle wasn't taking Edward's leaving the family very well either. That fact alone made me desperately want to see that future more clearly. Would he and Esme give up their lives if they lost Edward and Bella? The bond they had with Edward was different than what they shared with the rest of us. **

**"It's fine Jasper, you can come and meet us. When you're ready, I know you can do it."**

**"Wait a minute if Jasper is going then I'm going too," came Emmett's excited reply. Rosalie appeared behind him with a sour look on her face. It was clear she did not share Emmett's excitement. **

**There was so much to do and not a lot of time to do it in. If Bella died while trying to find Edward, I knew that he wouldn't be the only one who would seek death at the hands of the Volturi. I wasn't sure who that someone else would be - that much of the future was not clear to me yet. My one vision was still very vague as if a mist was wrapped tightly around someone. To my frustration, someone seeking death with the help of the Volturi, but hadn't fully decided, as if they were waiting on something.**

**My one wish for now was that we made it in time; for all of our sakes.**

**† † † † † † † † † †**

For the first time in my unnatural life, I wished Carlisle's Mercedes could go faster.

"Carlisle, we have to hurry."

Carlisle's bright topaz eyes locked with mine. Carlisle always exuded an air of calmness, no doubt a useful mannerism in the chaos of the ER, but today his eyes betrayed him – he was fearful.

"Alice, I'm going one hundred miles per hour as it is. We're lucky that the New York authorities haven't stopped us yet."

I could hear Emmett fidgeting in the back seat. He didn't really say why he wanted to tag along. I had a feeling it was because Edward wasn't here. Emmett also had the same fondness for Bella I had.

"So, Alice you didn't happen to see how angry Eddie was going to be at us for interfering with things especially when he asked us not too?" his loud surly voice boomed from the back seat

"Oh, he's going to be mad, but he'll get over it. He's starting to come to the same realization that Bella has; that he can't continue on without her," I stated matter-of-factly.

I drew in a quick breath as a vision wrapped its cold fingers around me. My chest tightened and my eyes started to sting with the tears I longed to shed. Oh my God! We were going to be too late.

"No, no, no," I cried out.

"What is it Alice?" Carlisle's voice was filled with concern when he spoke.

"The bridge! We have to make it to the bridge now! If we don't we're going to be too late!"

This couldn't be happening to me, to us. No, it just couldn't! Bella couldn't die now, there was just too much that hadn't been said yet.

The bridge was barely noticeable as I grabbed the handle of the door in anticipation of my quick exit. The image of Bella's car plunging into the icy water flickered inside my mind.

Just then another vision flashed in front of me. As I watched Bella's car flew into the air before plunging into the icy water. My breath caught in my throat and fear suffocated me. What the vision revealed next confused me: Jasper was standing where Bella's car had been; he turned and looked at me before jumping into the water. The sweet flowery scent of Bella's blood burned the inside of my nose. The smell of her blood caused warning lights to flash inside of my head, and triggered the memory from several months ago.

_Bella rolled her eyes at us, as she slid her finger under the paper. She then jumped slightly, "Ouch, paper cut."_

_One drop of blood rolled out of the cut and dropped to the floor. The second Bella's sweet scent had filled the air; Edward threw himself in front of Bella._

"_No!"_

_In effort to protect Bella, Edward had knocked her backwards. Flowers, cake, presents and plates scattered in her wake. The sound of Jasper slamming into Edward was like two large boulders crashing into one another during a rock slide._

_My Jasper had fallen into a very dark place that day. Snarling and snapping inches from Edward's face as he tried to shove past him. Even Emmett, had a hard time holding him back. There was no sanity in his eyes as zeroed in on Bella._

This made me realize the current dilemma: if Bella was hurt, how were we going to keep Jasper from attacking her? Why had he risked losing control again by coming here? A flood of emotion hit me as I ventured a guess at his motivation: Edward. Jasper had come here out of his love for his brother. He, better then any of us, knew Edward's true feelings for Bella. With Edward gone, Jasper hoped that saving Bella would give him atonement for the sin he felt he had committed against Edward.

A half mile from the bridge, Carlisle stopped the car. We all knew we had a much better chance of reaching Bella quicker if we went the rest of the way on foot. Thanks to the late hour, as well as the heavy down pour, there were no other cars on the road. We ran with inhuman speed toward the bridge even as sheets of water continued to fall and snap against my hard skin. Before me I could make out the mangled guard rail cables. I also picked up on the scent of wet sweet grass, vanilla and wet leather. Jasper had some how made it to the bridge ahead of us.

His wild curly blonde hair was now plastered to his head. He looked in our direction for what was less then a second. I could see that his eyes were the richest color of butterscotch I had ever seen them. The sight of their brightness made me think of Edward and all the precautions he took when he was around Bella.

"Jasper, wait!"

My pleas did little to stop his momentum even though I knew that he had heard me, he paid no heed to my cries. Jasper disappeared from the bridge and I knew he had jumped into the black water below, after Bella's sinking car. I didn't even realize that I had frozen in place until I heard the sound of Carlisle's voice.

"Alice! Alice, get moving! Bella needs all of us. Jasper will need you as well."

There was a loud smacking sound as we hit the water. Emmett moved toward Jasper's side. I think Emmett's decision had to do with the fact that he was unsure if it was safe for Jasper to be so close to Bella. They both dove under the water with Carlisle and I following close behind.

Emmett ripped open the driver's side door, while Jasper quickly freed an unconscious Bella from her seat belt. With Bella in his arms Jasper quickly headed toward the surface. Emmett, Carlisle and I were very close behind him. Oh, how I wished I knew what was going on in Jazz's head.

"_Oh, Edward, why did you have to leave?"_

Once we reached the surface, Jasper sprang from the water, heading for the embankment before jumping up and landing on the bridge. He was clutching Bella to him when we landed beside him. I couldn't read his mind, but I had seen the course he had chosen. Jasper was determined not to let anymore harm come to Bella.

Retrieving his medical bag from the car, Carlisle then held his hands up in front of him as he approached Bella and Jasper.

"You've done very well, Jasper. I'm proud of you son, I really am. You can relax now, I need to examine Bella. Gently lay her down. Edward would be grateful. Proud of you too, you know."

Jasper continued to hold onto Bella like she was his lifeline. I winced at the thought of the bruises she would have on her arms and ribs. Emmett tensed beside Carlisle. I wasn't sure if that was what caused Jasper to release his hold on Bella or whether he did it because I had moved to his side and had reached out to lay a hand down gently on his shoulder.

He swallowed back venom that must have been pooling in his mouth. His golden topaz eyes then moved to look down at Bella.

"I've caused them so much pain, Alice. Being this close to her, in the condition she's in now, it's maddening, but I have to do this. But not just for myself. I owe it to Edward and Bella."

I gave Jasper a small smile; my heart ached to see him in so much pain. I was also very proud of him.

"You did it Jazz, Bella is safe. You didn't hurt her, you saved her."

Emmett's voiced boomed loudly after my own.

"Alice is right--you're a hero, bro. So why don't you give Bella to Carlisle now."

In one quick fluid motion, Jasper laid Bella into Carlisle's arms as if she were no more than a feather. Emmett and I noticed he was clutching her bag in one of his hands. It didn't look that wet; maybe the photos and tickets were safe. I wasn't sure when he had decided to grab it, I was just glad he had.

Hearing Carlisle's quick intake of breath, I looked over at him and took in what he was seeing. Bella's clothes hung loosely on her body. Her skin was so pale she could have easily passed for one of us. Bella's face was gaunt and there were dark circle under her eyes from the lack of sleep.

"This was what you were keeping from us? Had I known that our leaving would affect her in such a way, I would have never…allowed…him to leave."

I winced at the hurt in Carlisle's voice when he spoke. "You should have said something Alice. Then again I should have known what our leaving would do to her. Bella is not a normal human; she was so emotionally involved with him. I should have seen that Edward's leaving would break her."

He knew what I had been hiding from them. Without Edward home to read my thoughts it had been rather easy. I wasn't proud of what I had done. I had just thought I was doing the right thing at first, by keeping the condition Bella's body to myself. Edward had asked us don't to meddle in Bella's life.

The doctor in Carlisle took control. He quickly moved about assessing her condition. Her airway was blocked with water, so she wasn't breathing, but there was still the faint sound of her heart beating. I watched with glassy eyes as Carlisle tilted her head back slightly, pinched her nose and forced two breaths of air in; followed by a second quick breath. This time her body reacted to the air being forced into her lungs. Carlisle already had her sitting up in his arms as she coughed and sputtered water.

"Alice, we need to get her warmed up. Hypothermia could set in at any time. Go get the car and turn the heat on. We're going to need those blankets, though you probably knew that all along."

The firm loudness of Carlisle saying my name shook me from my reverie. Carlisle then glanced over at Emmett and Jasper. Even though he had taken on the same commanding tone he would have in have in an ER, calmness seemed to settle around Carlisle.

"Emmett, Jasper the two of you need to step far away if this is becoming too hard for you."

Carlisle's rich golden eyes held mine as I came to his side.

"Alice, you should go as well."

As much as I respected Carlisle and loved my Jasper; I loved and respected Bella just as much.

My heart was torn as I looked from Carlisle and Bella to Jasper. Jasper knew me so well and he nodded his head at me, telling me in his own way that he understood my decision.

"No, Carlisle, I'm staying here with you and Bella."

"Alice."

I knew what Carlisle was thinking without having need for Edward's gift.

"I'll be fine. Everything is going to work out in the end. Just please, let me stay here with Bella."

Before we could get deeper into our discussion, the soft and confused sound of Bella's voice reached out toward me.

"Alice?"

I turned my attention toward Bella.

"It's okay Bella, I'm right here." I reached a hand out to gently brush away a few strands of her wet hair.

"I'm cold, so cold." Bella's lips quivered, as her body started to shake from the wet state she was in.

Carlisle did his best to soothe Bella as I watched with anxious eyes. My heart swelled and I had to fight to hold back a sob. The way Carlisle was gently cradling Bella in his one arms as he brushed wet strands of hair out of the way with the other was the image of a loving father chasing the monsters away after a nightmare.

"I've done what I can for the cut on Bella's forehead. It will be easier to check her over once we get home. I'm worried about hypothermia, and she may have a concussion."

The way Bella seemed to be slipping in and out of consciousness; I was becoming concerned as well.

"Carlisle?"

He seemed to know what I was going to ask, before I even said it.

"She's going to be fine. With some rest and good nutrition, Bella will be just fine. Though having Edward back would be the best medicine. I can not force him to return home, Alice. You must know that Edward was only doing what he thought was best for Bella."

As much as I hated it, I knew that Carlisle was right. Edward thought his chivalrous behavior was the correct course of action to protect Bella. He never once considered the dire consequences that I now viewed first hand. But I couldn't help wonder if there was something _I_ could do that would make him come home. If he saw her now, what would he do?

For right now I had not one flicker of a vision that would tell me if I would be successful, however, I could see how upset Esme was going to be when she saw Bella's condition.

I did have a strong sense of something else. There was some sort of gravity between Bella and Edward's soul. The soul that Edward was so sure he didn't possess. And that pull would continue to have influence on their lives.

Would Edward sense that something had happened to Bella? Would he come home? If he did, would he stay?

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**(Thank you to every one who is supporting this story.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko)**


	3. Mirrored Self

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he doesn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to make this choice for her? Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. She goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time:**_

_**Alice POV**_

"_Carlisle."_

_He seemed to know what I was going to ask, before I even said it. _

"_She's going to be fine. With some rest and nutrition, Bella will be just fine. Though having Edward back would be the best medicine. I can not force him to return home."_

_As much as I hated it, I knew that Carlisle was right. It was not easy to make Edward do something that he didn't want to do. There had to be something I could do that would make him come home to us. _

_For right now I had not one flicker of a vision that would tell me what that would be. I could, however see how upset Esme was going to be when she saw Bella's condition._

_There was something else that I didn't have a complete understanding of. It was, what kind of pull Bella had on Edward's very soul? The soul that he was so sure he didn't possess. _

_Would Edward sense that something had happened to Bella? Would he come home if he did or would he run away, again?_

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**Chapter 3: Mirrored Self**

_By TaintedDarkInuShemeeko_

**Edward POV**

The wooden chair flew through the air and smashed against the far wall of my small apartment. Wood splinters broke from the chair's frame on impact.

_Why? Why was this so hard?_ I had been so close to catching her, only to have her disappear. _Victoria._ once I ended her life. Bella would be safe from my world and free to move on.

"_**You're a fool **__**o**__**ne hundred and eight years on this earth and still as naïve as ever."**_

The voice I heard was my own.

"_**You've indulged yourself with this sad little game of cat and mouse and where has it gotten you? No where."**_

I glanced up at my refection in the mirror.

"Shut up!"

"_**I won't. She's the only reason you have to continue this life. It's time for you to realize that."**_

The night of her eighteenth birthday flashed inside of my head. The sweet smell of her blood burned fresh in my mind.

"It doesn't matter; I promised her that I would never put her in danger like that again. She's safe now to live her life as a human."

My reflection questioned me again.

"_**Can you be so sure of that?"**_

"Yes, Bella promised she wouldn't do anything reckless."

Several seconds passed before my image spoke again.

"_**Oh, so it's not her or she anymore? You do remember that trouble seems to be drawn to her like a magnet. How do you know that Bella is safe? She could be in the hospital or dead. Humans die everyday. Fires, floods, disease, gunshots, car accidents, rape. You know all of this and still you stay here."**_

"Enough! You're nothing more then a mirage brought on by the need to hunt."

"_**Am I? You know every word I've spoken is the truth. So tell me, which one of us is denying the truth, my friend?"**_

With anguished cry, I picked up a vase and threw it at the mirror.

"Argh!"

The mirror crumpled and broke free from the frame, scattering glass shards over the floor. The release of anger only made me feel better for mere second; before my own feeling of being broken as well as a failure took over again.

In two months I had not been able to let her go. When I looked at the mirror frame no one spoke to me. I looked down at the shards of glass that now littered the floor along with the chair pieces.

My left hand ran through my disheveled hair as I looked down. There in the glass my broken reflection looked back at me with dark hungry eyes.

"_**You've tasted companionship; it's not so easily thrown away."**_

Shaking the sound of my own voice from my head, I started toward the door. I needed to hunt before I lost my mind. I then caught a whisper of a voice on the wind. It was a voice I knew well, one I could never forget. The sound of the soft voice made me freeze.

"_I love you Edward. Forgive me."_

"Bella?"

I turned toward the sound of her voice. I'm not sure why I did it. What did I expect to find?

What I saw caused my mouth to feel like a desert. She was here! Somehow she had found me.

I took two steps toward her, only to realize Bella wasn't solid; she was transparent, ghost-like. My heart ached as large fissures erupted over the surface of my still heart. She wasn't real. The image before me was no different than the one, of myself that had spoken to me mere seconds ago. This was not the girl I had left behind, she looked lost and broken Anger at myself for hoping she was real came first. It was then replaced by the broken and empty feeling from before.

Breathing was becoming more difficult causing me to stop altogether. It was two seconds later when I realized that I was crying.

Turning my back on the fading image of my fragile little human, I sped out the door. I had to find my sanity again – I needed to hunt. Yet every time I had my prey within my sight and grasp, I would hear her soft voice whisper in the wind.

'_Edward, I love you. Come back to me.'_

Shaking the remains of her voice from my head, I tried again to focus on the hunt. As I stopped inside the clearing I could hear the pounding of their hearts. Venom flooded my mouth at the thought of tasting their blood on my lips. Closing my eyes I focused on finding the strongest heart beat. I needed a challenge and I was hoping that I could find it in one of the deer.

My eyes snapped open once I found the strong thumping heart I was looking for. At first I had thought that my prey was male, and then as I drew closer, I realized that it was a doe. There was no masking the fear that was causing her heart to pound wildly in her chest. She knew she was being hunted and was fleeing for her life. As I started to close in on the doe, my movement barely caused a leaf to flutter to the ground. I was running beside her seconds later, before I lunged and took her in my arms. The deer's coat was soft and buttery in my cold hands. One flick of a finger was all I needed to end its life and steal its life's blood from its body. Out of the corner of my eye I caught the reflection of something familiar in its deep brown eyes.

'_Edward, forgive me. I'll never leave you. I'm yours forever.'_

The sight of her in the deer's eye startled me, costing me my prey. The words her gentle voice spoke were perplexing to me. What did she mean when she asked me to forgive her? What had she done? The wind suddenly blew all around me; carrying with it the sweet smell of freesia and lavender and a hint of strawberries.

Something warm yet cool blew across my left cheek. I closed my eyes as I enjoyed the moment. The warm to cold air then brushed across my lips. The feeling I felt from it was familiar. It was a piece of heaven within my reach.

"Bella."

A soft smile etched itself across my lips; until my mind reminded me of something from earlier.

"_**Humans die everyday. Fires, floods, disease, gunshots, car accidents, rape. How do you know that Bella is safe? She could be in the hospital or dead."**_

The word _dead_ rang inside of my ears. No, no it couldn't be. I wouldn't allow myself to even think it. Bella was fine. She had to be. I could think of nothing else for her to be.

I stilled as the ghostly image of my love once again stood in front of me. Her deep,

soulful eyes spoke great volumes to me. I had hurt her deeply. I had known leaving was wrong yet I had reasoned that it was the right thing to do.

"_Why did you lie to me? Why did you leave me? You broke me the day you left me."_

My chest ached at hearing her words. Hallucination or not, I felt I owed her the truth about my actions.

"I only lied to you because I thought that it was the only way to protect you. I never knew how easy it would be. You believed me so fully. The only way I knew how to keep you safe was to leave you. You were in danger every minute you were with me."

The truth was I never expected that she would believe me so readily. I had envisioned her pleading with me more, telling me I was lying. It was in that moment of Bella believing I didn't want her anymore that I felt the first part of myself shatter. Though my heart ached it made me believe that she would be able to move on without me.

As I was about to tell her that it had not been my intention to break her, the apparition of my love turned away from me. It was in that very moment that I realized as I stood alone in the darkness. She had been my bright moon. And now all I had was a Lunar Eclipse.

My voice was so soft as I spoke that I almost didn't hear what I had said.

"I truly do love you, Bella Swan."

The ghostly image looked over at me one more time before fading into nothingness. The second she was gone, I allowed myself to fall to my hands and knees on the forest floor. The moist ground gave way under my weight, staining the knees of my pants with its dark soil. I heard the agonizing sound of a wounded animal rip through the clearing. It took me several minutes to realize that the mournful sound was erupting from my own chest.

My fingers dug into the ground breaking up the soil as my fingers curled into a fist. Another strangled cry sprang from my lips. I felt as if I was dying all over again. Pain spread throughout my frozen heart. I knew without a doubt that I had only sentenced myself to death. There was no light in my life without her. I had spoken, "You are my life, now" to her almost seven months ago and it was true.

Bella was my life. And I no longer knew how to exist in a world without her. I also however couldn't let myself put her in danger anymore. Seeing my beloved's reflection in the eyes of my prey, I realized I needed to be near her. So right there I made my decision. I would go back and keep watch over her. I would be Bella's dark guardian. I would watch from the shadows if need be.

Even though seeing her move on with her life without me would be painful, seeing her happy would heal some of the pain of losing her. Seeing her grow large and round with child. The very thing I longed to give her, but knew it could never be. The thought of another man touching her in the intimate ways a husband and wife did forced a low growl free from my chest. The image of Bella carrying another man's child was almost too much for me to bear. Until, I reasoned that I could always pretend that the child within was mine.

Suddenly realizing where my thoughts were taking me, I quickly shook them free. No, thinking like that wouldn't work. It would only make me want her back. And there was no going back for us.

I became aware of how many hours had gone by from the yellow-orange, blue and indigo colors that were painting the sky; twilight had come to this day.

I had once told Bella that this was my favorite time of day and it was also the saddest. I still felt that way, even if we could never share it together. The coming darkness would give me the cover I needed to once more attempt to track Victoria.

Then, I would go back to Forks. If only to prove to myself that Bella had moved on with her life as a human.

"_**What will you do if she hasn't? What do you think the image of her in the woods was trying to tell you?"**_

The sound of my own voice in my head was worse than the ones of my family. I had cut myself off from having contact with humans; coupled with the fact that my hunts had been poor of late. What would happen tonight if my hunt for Victoria brought me close to humans? Would I be able to resist the sound of the blood traveling through their veins? The mere thought of how warm and sweet the blood would be caused venom to once again pool inside my mouth.

There was only one thing I knew. I had to be fine. I was no longer the strong newborn fueled by my blood lust and pushed to the brink by my new overwhelming talent. I couldn't afford to worry about what might happen. Victoria was the only thing I needed to worry about. If there wasn't a thought with the image of Victoria in it, I didn't care about hearing it. As for what the ghostly image of my love was trying to tell me, I didn't want to think about it either.

The night air had a chill to it as I began my hunt for Victoria. I was thankful that the streets were mostly deserted. The burning in my throat seemed to be mocking me as I turned down one street after another. My hands shoved deeply into the pockets of the black fleece jacket I wore. There were ten more blocks to go before I reached my check point of sorts, when I stumbled across a thought that spoke of Victoria.

My feet froze in their steps as I took in the thought. It was so strong that I almost could taste it in my mouth. Two seconds passed before I realized why. The thought wasn't from a human, but from one of my own kind. My breath stilled as I took in the thought more. It wasn't anyone I knew.

'_Why does she need to go to him to do it for her? Then again, she's probably playing it safe. I'd love to sink my teeth in the human for her.'_

I had to push back a growl as a blurry image of my love ghosted through the young vampire's mind. It was madding to keep myself hidden once I understood just who the _him _was that the young vampires were thinking of. My answer came in the flicker of someone I had only meet once last spring.

Laurent!

My hands curled into fists of cold stone. _Trickster_ that's what Laurent was. He had let my family believe that he wanted to change, when it truth he had never given up his ties with the she-devil. Reality suddenly came crashing down around me. My reflection had been right. I had been playing a game of cat and mouse. Only I wasn't the cat, I was the mouse caught within Victoria's claws. She had some how known that I would come looking for her and I played right into her plan.

A chill ran through my body, freezing me to the core of my being as if melting snow had been dumped on me. Bella was in mortal danger and there was a chance that I wouldn't make it in time. Pushing the two fledging vampires from my mind, I turned quickly on my heels and took hurried steps away towards the midnight-blue GTOX 2000 Mustang I had rented.

I needed to get back to Forks quickly. I was tempted to humor the thought of calling my family and tell them that I was on the move again and then thought better of it. There was no point to worry them until there was a need to do so.

The rev of the engine was a soothing sound to my ears; its sound wasn't the sweet melody of one of my pieces. It was music nevertheless, music that would carry me to Bella. Time seemed to be moving even slower to me. Slow was not what I wanted as I pressed my foot down on the gas. I needed speed. The engine growled at me as the needle on the speedometer moved up causing the car to surge forward faster.

My desire to protect her from what my family was had blinded me from the creatures that were even more of a threat than my family. How could I've forgotten about Laurent? I had been a fool not to realize that he had not ended his friendship with Victoria.

I stiffened as I heard a voice in the wind that ripped passed me.

"_Edward, hurry and come back to me."_

The whispery voice sounded once again like my Bella. My eyes suddenly flickered to the rear view mirror.

"_**So tell me what are you going to do if you're too late?"**_

My conscience's question was foolish. I knew months before what I would do if she died. I would go to the Volturi and put an end to my existence.

"_**And what if Laurent doesn't kill her? What if he changes her, what would you do then, Edward?"**_

The answers to the questions that my inner self was asking were simple. Even though changing her into a monster like me wasn't what I wanted, I would be there every second for my beloved Bella. Something inside of my told me I wouldn't need to worry about him changing her. My worry came from knowing he would kill her and I wouldn't make it in time to stop it.

Laurent's desire revolved around tasting the sweetness of Bella's blood. Her scent had fascinated him that day on the field. It however wasn't worth losing his life after seeing how protective my family and I had been toward her. I gripped the steering wheel and it groaned its discomfort at me. If I could inflict physical harm to myself I would. It seemed I was doing a grand job of doing it emotionally.

I couldn't believe how utterly foolish I had been. In making my family leave Forks, I had left Bella open to danger. Guilt of knowing that tumbled down on my shoulders like a boulder. Flipping my phone open, I dialed the number for the airport. I could only hope I could get a private flight back to Forks.

There was the other part of me that tried to urge me to call my family in Ithaca, New York. After a few seconds, I was able to convince myself that it was better if I didn't. Emmett and Jasper would insist that they come with me. I couldn't have that. I was just checking on her. I could do that on my own; I didn't need my father or brothers to hold my hand as if I was a child. Calling home would also start a fight with Alice on how she was right and I was wrong. Now was not the time to argue over this with my sister. Once I was able to charter my private flight, I was hoping I could relax a little. But it was of no use, the only way I was going to relax was if I knew that Bella was safe from danger.

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My flight seemed to last forever. Once I touched down at Forks Airport, I wasted little time. Moving myself though the watchful eyes of humans, I headed off in the direction of the Swan home. For one small moment, I felt as if I was being pulled in the direction of what had been my home in just outside of Forks. I shook the feeling free. Now was not the time to think of the home I had left behind and the few belongings within.

Bella, I needed to check on her. I needed to see that she was safe.

Reaching her home, I scaled up the tree that sat close to her window. Looking through the window, I could see that she wasn't there; so I slipped silently through. I tensed for a moment when I realized that Bella's scent in her room was a week or so old.

I could hear Charlie's upset voice downstairs. It was then followed by the voices of two other men and that of a young man.

They where talking about Bella. Charlie's thoughts were filled with concern for his daughter. The young man that was there I realized was Jacob Black. His thoughts then echoed inside my mind.

'_I can't believe Bella ran away; especially after what he put her through.'_

An image of me flashed through Jacob's mind. It was then followed by an emaciated image of my Bella. Had my leaving really done that to my Bella? She had runaway? Something strong inside me told me I was to blame.

I could only hope that for now she was safe until I could find her. I quickly slipped back out the window and disappeared into the woods toward what had once been my home. I would hunt quickly and then look for clean clothes to change into. I then planned on searching for Bella.

Just as I was about to enter our home, all too familiar thoughts entered my mind. They were familiar to me because I had tasted this mind last spring. Anger flowed through my body causing it to tense as venom started to fill my mouth. I couldn't seem to shake his thoughts from my mind. Each one of them was of Bella. My hands tightened into fist at the image of his dark lips touching any part of Bella.

The clearer his thoughts were in my head, the closer he was physically getting to me. For now I was glad Bella had run away. It meant that Laurent wouldn't get to her and he never would. Nothing would bring me more pleasure then to be the one to end his life right here. The wind shifted around me, bringing with it the scent of cedar, pears and fresh human blood. I turned quickly to face my unwanted guest.

His eyes were a brighter red then I remembered them to be. It was clear that it hadn't taken him long to grow tired of the vegetarian lifestyle.

"Laurent!"

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**A/N: Okay everyone, sorry about the cliffy. It just had to happen. This chapter was one of my favorites to write so far. I had to get into Edward's mind a little bit. I hope I did a good job with his POV. Hopefully within the next I will have a new revised verison of the first chapter of Lunar Eclipse posted.**

**Brie**


	4. Penance

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

_**Last Time:**_

_**Edward POV**_

_Just as I was about to enter our home, all too familiar thoughts entered my mind. They were familiar to me because I had taste__d __this mind last spring. Anger flowed through my body causing it to tense as venom started to fill my mouth. I couldn't seem to shake his thoughts from my mind. Each one of them was of Bella. My hands tightened into fists at the image of his dark lips touching any part of Bella._

_The clearness of his thoughts in my head spoke of how close he was to me physically. For now I was glad Bella had run away. It meant that Laurent wouldn't get to her and he never would. Nothing would bring me more pleasure than to be the one to end his life right here. The wind shifted around me, bringing with it the scent of cedar, pears and fresh human blood. I turned quickly to face my unwanted guest. _

_His eyes were a brighter red than I remembered them to be. It was clear it hadn't taken him long to grow tired of the vegetarian lifestyle. _

"_Laurent!"_

* * *

**Chapter 4: Penance**

_By TaintedDarkInuShemeeko_

**Jasper POV**

Penance has many names: ,reconciliation, reparation, and atonement. Could I ever earn them after the sin I had committed right in front of my brother?

One second and one drop of blood was all it took to shatter everything. With my one savage act I had fired the gun that had shot the bullets and ended everything for Edward. He loved Bella to much to put her in any more danger, so we left.

Once Edward had made the decision for us to leave Forks, I had to limit my contact with him. His pain was burning a hole in my chest, making the guilt over my actions fester until I felt like I was being burned all over again. Edward had trusted _me_ so fully and I had betrayed that trust by not reining in the monster inside.

Though I couldn't read my family's thoughts, their emotions told me everything. Pain, disappointment, anger, and sympathy -- I experienced it all, especially the hurt I had caused Alice.

The only pain I couldn't shield myself from was Edward's. It was different. It was almost as if he was trying to will himself to die. I could only blame myself. Without Bella at his side it was as if his spine had been ripped from his body leaving him lifeless. After a week passed, Edward just up and left us. His absence from our home enveloped both Carlisle and Esme in a dark cloud. Their pain was slowly becoming my own, so much so that I didn't need my talent to feel their grief.

In the one-hundred and sixty-three years since my rebirth into this new existence I had never seen a bond between others of our kind like the one I could see and feel between Carlisle, Edward and Esme. It was that bond that made me want to change the way I existed.

_Fear_, the feeling that permeated the house since our return with Bella, snapped me out of my self-centered thoughts. Footsteps were barely heard as they rushed around getting whatever Carlisle asked for as he tried to insure Bella's life as a human continued. My eyes darted down at the drops of her blood that clung to my wet shirt. I shuddered as the memory of her rescue flickered inside my head.

_Bella's skin was ashen as I plucked her from the water. Her lips had a purplish-blue tint to them as I clutched her to me. There was a slight popping sound before I felt Alice's warm had on my shoulder. _

"_You did it Jazz, Bella is safe. You didn't hurt her, you saved her."_

_Emmett's voiced boomed loudly after Alice's words. _

"_Alice is right you're a hero bro. So why don't you give Bella to Carlisle now."_

_Her heart beat was slow but it was there. No air was passing through her lips._

_I knew that the best thing for me to do would be to relinquish Bella's limp form to the man who had shared his family with me. But before I could do that, I needed to win the internal struggle I was having with my tenuous self control. _

_There were small lacerations all over her body. The one that was slowly earning my attention was the one that lay open on her forehead. As the wound wept, it christened her hair with her sweet elixir. The burning in my throat turned into a roaring flame. I glanced down at Bella's face, to see that she had been replaced with an image of my sweet Alice. The mere thought of causing Alice harm made my stomach churn. With more force then I had intended I thrust Bella into Carlisle's waiting arms._

Shaking my head I brought myself back to the present. In one fluid movement, I was out the door and standing far off in our backyard unable to shoulder the burden of guilt from the emotions pouring out of my family as they tended to Bella. I occupied myself with dumping dried leaves into an old metal barrel. I then stripped off my shirt that was spotted with Bella's blood. I poured gasoline onto the shirt that bore the stain of my sin, before striking a match. In repentance I offered it to the flames that consumed it hungrily as soon as the lit match found its waiting target. If only true absolution was so easy.

The only thing I was sure of was that it wasn't safe to return to the house. I had pushed my limits enough today. As the fire light cast strange shadows across my bare chest, another haunting image came back to me from that night.

Edward's dark glaze blanketed me in darkness like a lunar eclipse covers the night.

It was that memory alone that hardened my resolve. I had to keep Bella safe. If Edward couldn't be her to protect her, then I would do it in his stead. Only this time, I would be even more careful. I would gorge myself with blood everyday if that's what it took to make sure I wasn't a danger to her. Edward had made it a practice, so would I. I knew of no other way to make it up to the two of them.

The sweet smell of daisies and oranges invaded my nose telling me that Alice was near. Though I could smell her, I continued to stare into the flames in front of me. She slowed a few steps behind me before continuing on towards me. Her touch was cool on the warmed skin of my shoulder.

"I thought you might want this." She held out a clean new shirt.

I turned toward my little pixie in half a second. Her gentle touch soothed the burning within my soul. When I was with Alice everything seemed so much clearer. As her graceful fingers traced each muscle on my chest, I placed my lips to hers in a consuming kiss. The purplish-gray shirt fluttered to the ground forgotten. Minutes later, the two of us pulled out of our embrace.

_Sadness _was suddenly pouring from my sweet. I took in a breath and cringed slightly at the light scent of Bella's blood that still hung in the air. I knew without asking that her emotions were about Bella.

Alice bent to retrieve her token of love/consolation. Even her simple movement of picking up my shirt was graceful like a waltz. Our fingers brushed together as I took the shirt from her.

"You're going hunting again." She said. It wasn't a question, but a statement.

I knew she knew my answer, but I spoke anyway. "It's better if I do. You know that Alice."

When she moved to speak I placed a finger to her lips to stop her.

"I won't be gone long, darling," as usual, my southern accent was a little strong on the word 'darling'.

I placed a kiss on her cheek before looking into her golden eyes.

"You know that you are welcome to come with me. I, however, know you one better darling. Stay here until Bella wakes, then we'll hunt together."

I crushed my lips to hers one last time before taking off into the forest that surrounded our new home. In truth, I really wasn't hungry so I had no plans of hunting yet. I did plan on running. The ground and trees seemed to shimmer in the moonlight due to the recent rainfall. My main reason for running was obvious: I need to escape from the swirl of emotions and have some time to myself.

My brain was telling me to keep running -- that it was too dangerous to stay at the house. Yet, I knew in my heart that I could not. I couldn't leave Alice, nor could I wound Carlisle by leaving. He had been tormented enough by Edward's abrupt departure. After two hours of fleeing my guilt I came to a stop, my attention focused on the beating of hearts a half mile to my east. Even though I wasn't that hungry instinct took hold of me; turning me into a gust of wind as I headed toward the herd of thumping hearts.

Releasing my hold on my prey allowed it to fall limply to the ground. Picking up on the scent of drying blood, I surveyed the area around me. There was a lifeless deer in front of me, as well as three more lying in the area to my right. The thrill of the chase was gone now. I was so engorged that I felt I would burst if I wasn't careful with my movements. The hour was growing late so I knew I would have to return to the house soon. If I didn't, Alice would only worry. I hadn't been that hungry so why had I gorged myself with so much blood? I had done so and not even realized it. No, that wasn't true. I knew why I had done it, to have the strength to hold down the monster within in order to keep Bella safe from me.

_Guilt._ Ever since the night of Bella's birthday, it had been twisting deep inside me as if someone had stabbed me with a bayonet. This was the first time in weeks I had been allowed to be alone to my own devices. I sought release from this feeling, but didn't know what to do about it. I had apologized to my family and expressed my shame to Edward, so what more did I have to do to release this guilt and self-hate from within myself? I continued to stare into the lifeless eyes of the deer in front of me. All of a sudden the answer seemed so simple and right in front of me.

_Bella. _I had yet to express my remorse to her. Alice had told me once that it wasn't necessary; she assured me that Bella already knew that was ashamed of what I had tried to do. Despite what Alice had said, I knew now the only way to find peace within myself again -- I needed to ask for Bella to give me penance if she would. In the eyes of many in our family, Bella was Edward's mate and I had been the catalyst that had forced him from her; I had to set things right.

Picking up the carcasses of the four deer I had consumed, I quickly disposed of their bodies so I was free to head home. I was concerned about Bella's condition. The more I dwelled on the popping sound I had heard earlier, the more I was sure that I had broken something while she was in my crushing grip. I was a mile and a half from the house when my family's emotions crashed down on me like a massive wave.

As I walked into the house, I saw that the somber faces from earlier this week had returned. I didn't see Alice upon entering the house; I knew right away that she and Esme were with Bella. Rosalie was looking out the window at the storm that was gathering outside; her arms were folded tight across her chest. Her body spoke of its anger, yet her face was expressionless. Emmett wore a grim look on his face as well, and the emotions inside him were churning much like the storm clouds outside.

As I cautiously made my way up the spiral staircase, I noticed that Carlisle has stepped out of Bella's room and was leaning against the doorway waiting for me.

"How's Bella doing, Carlisle?"

He was silent for a moment and understanding soon washed over me. Carlisle was trying to rein in his emotion.

"Her body has been weakened from this ordeal but her will to continue living seems to be stronger. Alice told me that Bella was coming to find Edward."

My head bobbed up and down in understanding. Clearing my throat, I asked the one thing I had been dreading, but knew it was necessary if I were to over come temptation.

"May I go in and see her?"

_Curiosity _flowed from Carlisle like a small trickling stream followed quickly by _strong _a_pprehension_. His topaz eyes locked with mine. _Surprise _and_ understanding_ slipped free from him as he took in the bright buttery gold of my eyes. Carlisle could tell that I was stuffed to the gills with blood. There was no room for temptation to give in.

"Of course, Jasper, go on in. I'll be right here."

"Thank you, Carlisle."

I couldn't blame Carlisle for still taking cautionary measures with me. I would feel the same way if our places were reversed. Upon entering I stood in the doorway, taking in my surroundings.

The room was familiar but I hadn't glanced at it for months. Edward's scent was faint but it was still here. Esme had been reluctant to clean in fear of removing what little of his scent lingered in the room. Edward's music collection lined one wall, while his book collection lined the other. Various treasures graced the front of each shelf.

Esme sat in an old wicker chair beside the bed that Bella lay upon. The bed I realized was a new addition; its new scent intertwining with Bella's flowery scent. My attention moved back to Esme as she was gently rubbing her thumb over Bella's small hand. Her voice was a soft whisper as she mumbled something to her.

"I'm so sorry, sweet Bella. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive us."

It was then I realized that Alice was speaking softly to Bella as well as she hovered near the head of the bed on the left side.

"You're safe now, Bella. We're not going to run any more I promise you."

Alice glanced over at me giving me a half-hearted smile. Brushing her bangs aside, Alice placed a soft kiss on Bella's forehead. She moved toward me, lacing her right hand within my left before bringing her lips up to meet mine. One look into her beautiful golden-honey eyes spoke more volumes than words could. Alice had seen ahead of time that I would come here. She was also aware of what I was looking for.

_Penance _for my actions as well as a way to cleanse myself of the guilt. There were a few in our family that felt I had nothing to atone for. I had been following the instinct of what we were. Due to Carlisle's guidance I no longer wanted to look at myself as a monster. I had to believe that I was somewhat above that. The one person that I cared deeply for did not see me as such. Nor, did I see her as such.

I watched as Alice walked behind the chair where Esme still sat. She laid a hand gently on her shoulder.

"Esme, why don't we go get some fresh air? Maybe grab a quick bite to eat. Emmett and Rosalie are going."

It took all the strength I had in my body not to curl in on myself as the heart breaking sorrow Esme was emitting washed through me. I gave Alice a grim smile as she looked in my direction once more before disappearing out the door with Esme in tow. I knew from the warm scent of warm cinnamon and sandalwood that Carlisle was still close by.

I moved slowly toward the chair that Esme had been sitting in. Taking a deep breath, I took in Bella's sweet scent and held it. I waited for the dam to break and for the blood- lusting creature to claw its way free from me. However, the desire to have her blood was only a dull flicker in the back of my throat. Overstuffing myself had worked its small wonder. Exhaling the sweet air I had been holding in, a sigh of relief escaped its confinement within me.

Though Bella and I were vastly different from one another, I realized there was one trait that we shared: the will to sacrifice for the ones we loved. It was the one common thread between us that had me wanting to get to know her and understand her more.

"You, Bella Swan, are a paradox to me. Then again, I so 'pose you already knew that. You were a paradox to Edward long before me." I felt a small smile tug on the corners of my mouth.

Lifting my head up, I looked at the pale, fragile form of the young woman who lay in the bed next to me. How could such a little thing like her throw this family into such chaos? Alice continues to blame Bella's condition on Edward. Carlisle and Esme blame themselves for not considering the thought of allowing Edward to take Bella away some where for awhile. Rosalie blames Bella for being weak. Emmett blames no one stating that it was bound to happen if Bella and Edward parted for long. I, Jasper Cullen, on the other hand blamed no one but myself.

I was aware of the risk of Bella being a part of our lives. Just like so many of my family, I was willing to look the other way when I saw the spark of life that Bella ignited deep within my brother. Once Edward had decided to turn from the path of ending her life, I began to feel emotion roll from him that I never had before. The simple feeling of his happiness made me joyful.

But now Edward's joy lay battered and broken before me. Bella's body portrayed Edward's emotions perfectly. Even though leaving Bella had been his choice, leaving her had broken him and had thrown him into a darkness I had never experienced before. Edward's very being seemed to have withered and died; much like the prairie grass in the hot Texas sun.

Turning my thoughts back toward my task, I took in a deep breath.

"I'd like to ask you to forgive me for what I did that night. Not just for my actions, but for the consequences of those actions. I tore away your reason to live. I didn't see it before, but I do now. You complete him, Bella. I see now that it was you who pulled him from the darkness."

I couldn't seem to pull my eyes away from her ashen-colored face. Carlisle had sewn the gash on her forehead closed while butterfly band aids pulled closed some of the lesser cuts on her face. A large purple and black bruise lay cross her right cheek; it seemed to blend with the dark circles under her eyes.

An IV line twined out from the bend in her right elbow. Staring at the IV line was how I noticed the long thin scar that ran from her wrist to her elbow. There was one more scar on her that I had yet to look at. It was the crescent shaped one on her hand. James had branded her that day, stealing something precious from my brother. Edward had to see reason – and return home. I had no reason to ever believe in fate until it found me on rainy day in a small diner -- when I stumble across my own angel, announcing that I had kept her waiting. Fates cord had firmly wrapped Bella and Edward together (just as it had Alice and I).

_Pain_ had been what had made Edward run. I however, had a strong feeling that it was going to be fate that returned him to us. Bella was Edward's liquor, just as much as Alice was mine.

I soon found myself running a finger across Bella's crescent scar. Seconds later, Bella's body stiffened on the bed. Her heart was pounding rapidly in her chest. Right before a familiar name slipped from her lips.

"No, Edward, don't!"

* * *

**A/N: So what did you think of Jasper? I will have to say he was indeed a challenge for me to write. I hope, was able to do him some justice.**

**Review and tell me you thoughts, or join me over on my Lunar Eclipse thread:**

**http://www(dot)twilighted(dot)net/forum/viewtopic(dot)php?f=33&t=6752&st=0&sk=t&sd=a&sid=&start=10**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	5. Seek and You Shall Find

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to make this choice for her? Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. She goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time:**_

_**Jasper POV**_

_There was one more scar on her that I had yet to look at. It was the crescent shaped one on her hand. James had branded her that day, stealing something precious from my brother. Edward had to see reason – and return home. I had no reason to ever believe in fate until it found me one rainy day in a small diner -- when I stumble across my own angel, announcing that I had kept her waiting. Fates cord had firmly wrapped Bella and Edward together (just as it had Alice and I). _

_Pain__ had been what had made Edward run. I however, had a strong feeling that it was going to be fate that returned him to us. Bella was Edward's liquor, just as much as Alice was mine. _

_I soon found myself running a finger across Bella's crescent scar. Seconds later, Bella's body stiffened on the bed. Her heart was pounding rapidly in her chest. Right before a familiar name slipped from her lips. _

"_No, Edward, don't!"_

**Chapter 5: Seek and You Shall Find**

_By TaintedDarkInuShemeeko_

**Bella POV**

The wipers on the car squeaked as they dragged across the windshield. New York was where the Cullen's were at least it's what Alice's message had told me before my stupid phone died. For the hundredth time I cursed my hasty packing before leaving Forks. If only I had grabbed the charger to my phone! I didn't even have a way of contacting Alice as the screen on my phone went blank before I could retrieve her number. Even though, it had been wonderful to hear Alice's voice. It had been a gentle reminder that they _did_ exist.

I was free of Forks now and again steeled my resolve: the only way I was going back was with Edward.

The road stretched endlessly ahead of me and gave me nothing but time to replay the events that set me on this cross county road trip.

**"_You were just something for me to fill my time with. There was nothing more to it; just the imagination of a silly girl."_**

"_It will be like I never existed."_

He had spoken his lies to me and I had easily believed them. After all, it never made sense for him to love me. But as I stroked the locket hanging around my neck, I realized how foolish I had been.

I had been a fool to have doubt when I had been so sure of our love. I wasn't going to give up on us. Human or not, I was going to prove to him how strong I was. I had told him that what had happened with Jasper didn't matter to me. And I had meant what I had said, it didn't matter. All that mattered to me was being with Edward. And now I knew he felt the same about me.

In my reality, I heard the words I longed to hear pass from his lips,

_"I do love you, Bella. I can't spend a minute apart from you. I want nothing but more time with you."_

"_Not being with you will be like never existing."_

The only thing I could do was find him and hear from his mouth what the truth really was. He had lied to me once before, how was I to keep him from trying to lie to me again? How could I make him see that whatever the risks, us being together was meant to be? I just had to think of a way to get the truth out of him – to get him to stop hiding behind his gallant justification of trying to 'protect me' and speak from his true heart.

But I didn't really have a plan; I was making it up as I went. There was only one thing I was sure of -- there was something far greater then myself calling out to me causing me gravitate toward Edward, wherever he was.

Edward had once said to me that my time was up the day I met him. I, however, disagreed. My time seemed to end the day Edward left. He was the only one who could mend this hole in my chest. I _would_ find a way to make him take back his lie.

From Forks, I had passed through Idaho, then Wyoming. I stopped in Topeka, Kansas where I bartered my car for another one. With my money dwindling, I took odd jobs such as cooking and cleaning as I traveled.

My travels took me through St. Louis, Missouri and Springfield, Illinois. The tension in my body started to calm and my resolve grew stronger when I passed through Columbus, Ohio, knowing there was only one state lying between Edward and me. After seventeen days of driving I was almost there. My heart flooded with excitement as I passed a sign that read Welcome to New York.

My excitement was short lived though as I was suddenly faced with the fact that I still had no plan. Panic set in. I just couldn't lose him! There had to be something I could do. My head ached as I tried to figure out a way for this to work out. What was it I could do to show him that he needed me as much as I needed him? The fact that Edward was so thick headed made it hard to figure out how to show him what he meant to me. The only answer I had was his family. I had to hope one of them knew of a way for me to reach Edward.

Even though the temperature was freezing and the rain was slowly turning the roads into an icy mess, I continued to drive. It was a risk I was willing to take after such a long journey. I was just too close to my destination to stop now.

I was so deep in thought I didn't register what was happening until it was too late. The sliding sound of my tires alerted me first. The car then started to hydroplane on the road as a scream erupted from inside of me. The vehicle careened sideways on the road before descending toward the railing of the bridge.

"Oh God, Edward, I love you!"

As those six words left my lips, the only thought that registered in my brain was that I was going to die without seeing him again; without Edward ever confessing his lies.

_These violent delights have violent ends. _

_* * * *_

I vaguely remembered how weightless the car felt as it soared through the air before it plunged into the icy water. I also remembered panic digging its nails into me as the car start to sink and fill with water.

Anything else that happened to me was lost until I heard Alice's voice. At first I wasn't even sure if Alice was real. There had been several moments that I had thought that Edward was right beside me, only to find out that he wasn't real. So I wasn't sure if I could trust that this was real. Her bell-like voice was calling out to me, leaving me with only one thing to do and that was to test it out.

"Alice?"

In the hazy fog I was floating in, I heard her answer me.

"It's okay, Bella, I'm right here."

It took me several minutes to realize that the chattering of my teeth was what was making talking so difficult. Though it was a struggle I was able to find my voice again, "I'm cold, so cold."

Even though my body was freezing, the feeling of a cold hard hand against my flesh was comforting to me. I felt someone's nimble fingers (Alice's no doubt) slip through my hair. My body was then pressed against someone's firm hard chest. Struggling to keep my eyes open, the only thing I could make out was the warm butterscotch color of a pair of eyes. Then the dark claws of unconsciousness began to pull me back into its grip. Struggling to resist, I called out to the one person that I could remember having such warm eyes.

"Ed-ward, don't g-o, don't lea-ve m-e."

Everything had been so dark and silent. Then there were voices echoing through the darkness. Something in the back of my mind was telling me I knew who the voices belonged to. The throbbing of my head was making focusing difficult. I had thought of trying to open my eyes but then thought better of it.

As I allowed myself to give into the now feathery arms of unconsciousness, the voices were growing softer until they faded. But bright sunny dreams didn't await me in the darkness. The forest was suddenly all around me again.

"No, no, no! Anywhere but here," I cried.

My plea wasn't answered.

Edward's image appeared several inches in front of me.

"_You're no good for me, Bella. And I'm not good for you either."_

My breathing was coming out in labored gasps. I started to shake my head in disbelief. The hole in my chest twisted at hearing his words.

"No, no, this isn't real now; this is all inside my head. You lied to me; everything you told me was a lie!"

I wasn't aware that I was crying until my tears ran down my cheeks.

"You broke me, Edward. How could you do that to me, to us? You threw me away, but that's not the worst part. You ripped the center of my heart out and took it with you when you left. As far as I'm concerned, you took a part of my soul too."

All of the anger I had been keeping bottled up at Edward boiled over at last, causing me lash out at the person who had put me through so much. I wasn't completely aware of what I had done until I registered the loud _smack_ sound. I had just let my tempter get the better of me and I had slapped Edward.

"I'm not giving up on us and I'm not going anywhere until I find you."

"_Bella, promise me you won't do anything dangerous or reckless."_

For all of the effort I put into the slap I had given him, it had done nothing to this shadow of Edward that I saw inside my head.

"_Good-bye, Bella."_

Edward then disappeared just like he had two and a half months ago.

Now that I knew the truth that had been hidden in his lies, hearing those words again shouldn't have hurt, but it did. Just as I was about to give in to the pain in my chest, the sound of Alice's voice echoed through the woods.

"_You're safe now, Bella. We're not going to run anymore. I promise you."_

The bright green forest started to tip and roll as if I was standing in a boat. There was a strong tugging feeling from deep inside my chest. Almost as if something was trying to get me to follow. The forest soon melted away, to be replaced by a snow covered field. It was very familiar to me, but I couldn't remember where I had seen it before.

Then it came back to me -- _the Cullen baseball field! _I was standing in the empty field where I had joined the Cullen's eight months ago on a stormy afternoon. Something soft landed on my nose causing me to look up into the sky where a dozen or so more snowflakes came dancing down. Out of all the places I could have visited in my dreams, why was I here?

As I searched my surroundings, two dark shapes stood out in the distance. I squinted against the snow fall to try and see the figures better. As I tried to see who it was, the tugging sensation took over my body. It was bringing me closer to the dark figures.

The snow was sticking to the two unknown figures. They were too still, like they were statues. But somehow, I knew that they weren't. The wind picked up speed, causing the snow to swirl all around me as I walked closer to them.

Suddenly the figures disappeared in a blur of black and white. There was an eerie metallic scraping sound, followed by the loud smack sound of two boulders hitting each other. I knew that sound! It was the sound vampires made when they collided with one another. Two vampires were fighting just a few feet from me. The hole in my heart throbbed as the two strangers continued to battle.

Why, why did my chest ache at the sight of two unidentified vampires fighting? My breath whooshed out of my body as a familiar velvety voice traveled from one of the vampire strangers.

"_I'll never give you the chance to get that close to her."_

_Edward!_ His voice was fierce as he gave the other vampire his warning. I had many dreams with Edward in them since he left me, yet I couldn't remember one where he was defending me from a vampire. All of the ones that burned the brightest in my memory were the ones where he left me alone in the cold dark forest.

This dream was new.

Who was it that Edward was fighting with? I focused myself to walk closer to them. I was close enough to him now that I could smell his sweet scent. Glancing over his shoulder I gasped and took a step back as I saw who standing in front of Edward -- Laurent.

Hadn't he had left to go live with the Denali's? My heart jumped inside my chest as I took in the color of Laurent's eyes. They weren't gold or orange, but a deep maroon. Laurent had gone back to killing humans.

His accent was thick as he spoke to Edward.

"_Victoria is going to be rather cross with me. She was hoping to kill your mate, in exchange for you killing hers. Seeing how I found you here instead of Bella, you will have to do."_

What? No, no! He couldn't do that. This was my dream so that meant I could change what was going to happen.

"I'm the one Victoria wants, so kill me!" I yelled.

Edward seemed to shudder at my words. Laurent, on the other hand, acted as if he hadn't even heard me. Edward crouched as if he was getting ready to brace himself for an attack. A low warning growl rumbled its way free from Edward. Laurent hissed in response and prepared to spring at Edward.

My heart continued its rapid pounding inside my chest. This couldn't be happening! If this was a dream then why hadn't Laurent come after me instead of Edward? I cringed at the sound of tearing fabric and the loud crack of their bodies colliding once more. The hair on the back of my neck stood on end as a wolf howled somewhere in the distance.

I could feel the hole in my chest widen as Laurent managed to flip Edward on his back slamming him into the ground. I understood now, I had died and this was my hell. To watch as Edward died for me.

Somehow Edward managed to get the upper hand on the older vampire and he knocked Laurent off of him.

As I continued to watch the battle, I had no hope in putting a stop to it. I caught the blur of something that was orange brown in color move in the snow covered woods. Something was out there watching Edward and Laurent fight.

Edward's head snapped up to look in the same direction that I was looking in. He knew that something was watching them as well. A smirk appeared on Laurent's face as Edward released his hold distracted by the movement in the woods.

"_It would seem that I won't be able to finish you off as I had hoped," Laurent lamented._

In the forest, a darker shadow moved along side the lighter one. Both creatures seemed to be focused on Edward. The fury of the snow storm seemed to be intensifying. Whatever had been in the woods watching was now making its way through the tree line. As the first one stepped out into the snow covered clearing, I started to hyperventilate, overcome with fear.

They were horse-sized wolves, one black and one that was a russet in color.

I watched with horror-filled eyes as Laurent took off running, leaving Edward to face the two wolves. There was another howl as three more blurs of color took off after Laurent. There were more than just these two wolves.

"_We have a treaty, you wouldn't want to break it would you? I care very little about what your pack does to him." Edward said, addressing the approaching wolves._

Edward was talking to the wolves like they could understand him. I also noticed that he had not moved out of his crouched position. He was waiting to see if they were going to attack. The black wolf snorted and took off after Laurent and the others. The russet one just continued to stare at Edward.

I took in Edward's appearance; his shirt was torn in the front revealing a ripple of muscle. One of the sleeves of his coat had been torn off exposing his marble skin to the snow fall. A low rumble escaped Edward's chest, causing the wolf to growl in return. Edward then took a step toward the massive wolf.

"No, Edward, don't!"

* * *

**A/N: Okay, I wonder how many of you are cursing me now. The end of this chapter was to show how strong of a bond Edward and Bella have. I hope you enjoyed.**

**Oh Lunar Eclipse was nominated for a Shimmer Award for Best Drama. I was very surprised and honored to see it in my box. Voting starts after the Holidays on Dec. 27th at shimmerawards(dot)webs(dot)com.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	6. Choosing to Exist

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to make this choice for her? Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. She goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time: **_

_**Edward POV**_

_Just as I was about to enter our home, all too familiar thoughts entered my mind. They were familiar to me because I had tasted this mind last spring. Anger flowed through my body causing it to tense as venom started to fill my mouth. I couldn't seem to shake his thoughts from my mind. Each one of them was of Bella. My hands tightened into fists at the image of his dark lips touching any part of Bella. _

_The clearer his thoughts were in my head, the closer he was physically getting to me. For now I was glad Bella had run away. It meant that Laurent wouldn't get to her and he never would. Nothing would bring me more pleasure then to be the one to end his life right here. The wind shifted around me, bringing with it the scent of cedar, pears and fresh human blood. I turned quickly to face my unwanted guest. _

_His eyes were a brighter red then I remembered them to be. It was clear that it hadn't taken him long to grow tired of the vegetarian lifestyle. _

"_Laurent!"_

* * *

**Chapter 6: Choosing to Exist**

_By TaintedDarkInuShemeeko_

**Edward POV**

A low growl slipped from my lips and was soon followed by a hiss as I glared at Laurent. I shouldn't have dismissed the bonds between him, Victoria and James so quickly. I didn't focus on it because they were nomads. Nomadic vampire didn't keep strong ties. Or so I had thought.

"I was in the neighborhood and thought I would stop by," Laurent's tone was casual as his gaze drifted toward the house behind me.

'_The scent around the house is months old. So what has caused him to come here alone? The scent of the girl is old as well. I believe Victoria misjudged them.'_

Anger flared to life inside of me at the mention of the flamed-haired vampire. Laurent spoke soon after the thought of Victoria flickered inside his mind.

"Well now, since it is obvious that I have come at a bad time, I will be going now." He turned to leave, walking at a human pace toward the woods.

I stood there at first, waiting for his thoughts to reveal his next move. I didn't have to wait long for Laurent's thoughts to lace themselves inside my mind.

'_She'll want me to keep looking for her. They could have her anywhere, perhaps a quick look at the girl's house.'_

Bloody images of Charlie tore through my mind as a result of his thoughts. Laurent didn't just plan on scoping out Bella's home -- he planned on killing anyone he found there.

The agony that Charlie's death would cause Bella was almost too much for me to process. Instead of our leaving allowing her to move on, it had the reverse effect. I had been unknowingly leading Bella and her father to the slaughter.

I shot forward after Laurent with only one thought in my mind. I knew Carlisle would not be happy with my decision to kill, but I also knew that he wouldn't want harm to come to Bella's family.

Unfortunately Laurent caught my scent sooner than I had hoped, costing me the element of surprise. As he turned to face me I lashed out at him.

"Oh, ho! I forgot you're the mind reader in your family," he jeered, swiftly dodging my attack.

Laurent moved to the left to attack me, I bolted to the right. He would lunge towards me and I would in turn parry his move. To the eyes of a human the two of us would merely look like two blurs of color.

"You may have gotten the drop on James, but you were not alone. Do you really think that you can kill me without help? I'm three hundred years old, while you have only seen perhaps a small faction of the centuries I have," he taunted.

Doubt in my ability distracted me. The next thing I knew I was on my back and snow was clinging to me. Laurent was several inches away, circling me like a shark circles its prey.

"The human truly is a pet I presume. I will admit that I'm intrigued that you and your family haven't killed her yet. She's rather mouthwatering, don't you think?"

As I continued to watch him, I found that most of Laurent thoughts were centered on Bella. So much so he was speaking them aloud now. His very thoughts were starting to push me closer toward the edge. My breaking point came in the form of a broken and bloodied image of Bella oozing from Laurent's mind.

"I'll never give you the chance to get that close to her," I spat, springing to my feet in fury.

I lashed out toward Laurent once again, my hand catching the jacket he was wearing tearing the shoulder seam. Laurent's blood-colored eyes darted to the rip.

"I was rather starting to like the jacket. And now you've damaged it." _'It is only going to help quicken your end.'_

He whirled on me before I got a chance to move, hitting me square in my chest and hurling me across the field. The _rip _of tearing fabric could be heard echoing through the snow covered field along with the _crack_ of a young tree that my stone hard body collided with.

A wicked _smirk_ appeared on Laurent's lips as he spoke, "Victoria is going to be rather cross with me. She was hoping to kill your mate, in exchange for you killing hers. Seeing how I found you here instead of Bella, you will have to do."

He continued to taunt me with bloody, mangled images of Bella. I suddenly realized all of this was just a game to him. Laurent's intent of these images was to goad me into a blind fury. He knew if I lost focus, it would make killing me that much easier.

I then caught the whisper of Bella's voice in the snow driven wind.

"_No, I'm the one Victoria wants, so kill me!" _her voice was frantic as she pleaded for my life.

I felt myself flinch at her words. Even this apparition of my love wanted to sacrifice her existence for my own.

Noting that Laurent hadn't turned toward her voice was further proof of my unraveling sanity. Nonetheless, I longed to feel her warm cheek against my artic hand and pull in her sweet flowery scent one last time. Even if it were only to remind me that she still existed.

Laurent continued to study me; he knew I was doing the same. I crouched down preparing myself for Laurent's inevitable attack. A low warning growl rumbled its way free from inside my chest. Laurent hissed in response and prepared to spring.

Our bodies moved at a blinding pace of attack and counterattack, his thoughts revealing his moves a split second before he moved. But his overall strategy was clear: severe my head from my body. Seeing that this was dead set in his mind, I decided to change my plan of attack. The last minute change cost me the left sleeves of my jacket and shirt.

Laurent _smirked_ as he glanced at my shredded sleeves.

'_Now we're even, boy. Victoria, however, isn't finished with you. She won't stop until you and her are even. A mate for a mate, boy.' _

As I was about to connect with Laurent's body once more, the feeling of being watched seeped into my cold skin. The howl of a wolf off in the distance broke through the insulating silence of the snow. My head snapped up to look in the direction of the trees. Something was out there watching us fight.

I turned toward Laurent in response to hearing his thoughts on the wolves

'_No, this can not be possible!'_

A _smirk_ appeared on Laurent's face as I released my hold, distracted by sudden movement in the woods.

"It would seem that I won't be able to finish you off as I had hoped," Laurent lamented.

The wolves were still here! After all this time, they still existed. I was astounded at their presence and questioned why we had not sense them when we returned here over a year ago.

Though the fury of the snow storm had intensified, I caught movement coming from the tree line of the forest. The musky, earthy scent of them caused my nose to draw up in disgust. Two wolves were emerging from the trees, one large black one and the other was a russet color. I skimmed their thoughts to learn more about them. Sam Uley and Jacob Black were the two wolves that stood before me now. It was all making sense now; the wolf gene lied dormant within the bloodlines of certain families. That was why my family and I hadn't sensed it earlier. The gene hadn't awakened yet, but why now?

I hissed and growled in frustration as Laurent took off running, leaving me alone with the two wolves. There was another howl as three more blurs of color took off in Laurent's direction. There were more than just these two wolves! I had no idea that so many Quileutes had changed into wolves. I knew without a doubt that they would take care of Laurent as soon as they were sure I wasn't going to try and stop them.

Their solution if I did was to kill me. Would this new generation abide by the rules of the treaty?

"We have a treaty, you wouldn't want to break it would you? I care very little about what your pack does to him." I said, in reply to their thoughts.

I decided to stay in my crouched position, with my vital points protected. My chin rested on my chest as my eyes remained trained on them. The black wolf seemed to be appraising me before snorting and turning to take off after Laurent and the other wolves.

'_A bloodsucker is a bloodsucker to me, Jake. But he's right-- we have a treaty with his family. Just look at his eyes. His eyes are gold in color; it marks him as a Cullen. You can stay here if you want but I'm going after the others.'_

Jacob continued to stare at me. He was furious with me and with Bella. I could hear and see everything that passed through his mind. It was a very jumbled and chaotic place to be. Only once before had I experienced the likes of hearing a collection of thoughts swimming within the mind of one being before. Yet the collective mind of the pack fascinated me all the same. Jacob showed no signs of knowing that I could read his thoughts.

'_Damn fucking leech, you broke her you know. For two whole months I tried to fix her and I couldn't, because she wouldn't let me. Then she just ups and leaves, I would have gone after if I could have but…'_

Jacob's thoughts trailed off for the count of six seconds before starting somewhere new.

'_He's got a lot of nerve coming back here now. Then again he already knows she's gone. He was in her house, I could smell him. I really couldn't care about some old damn treaty. I ought to kill him right here, right now.'_

A low rumble escaped my chest, causing Jacob to bare his teeth in return. I took a step towards him. The second I moved I heard Bella yelling at me.

"_No, Edward, don't!"_

I had to quickly remind myself that it was only the wind. It was the tear I had created in my heart that made me think she was near.

Putting my hands up in front of me, I took another step towards the russet wolf.

'_If it even looks like his going to charge me, he's dead.'_

"I have no plans of fighting you. If anyone breaks the treaty it won't be me. If you would be so kind to shift back to your human form we would be able to discuss this much better."

'_Fuck, don't tell me this leech can read my mind! I just thought it was just hearsay.'_

"Yes, I can, but it is not a talent I take pride in. As for it being hearsay, hearsay has more merit then you may think."

Jacob snorted in my direction before taking several steps backwards, until he was safely hidden in a thicket of snow covered trees.

'_Sam's going to have my hide for doing this alone.'_

"You better not try anything blood sucker."

Jacob had phased back to his human form to confront me. I sighed at hearing his voiced thoughts. He had no problems with speaking his mind. It reminded me of someone who was dear to me, Bella.

"You have my word, Jacob."

Jacob's response was almost a sneer.

"What good is the word of a bloodsucker?"

I kept my eyes on the tree line while my ears were listening for any sound of attack from my sides.

"I could ask the same of you, dog."

He gave my words a little bit of thought.

"Point taken, leech."

We both were at a stand still. After several seconds of uncomfortable silence I decide to speak.

"I want to thank you, Jacob, for trying to make Bella see reason."

Jacob however just snorted, "Yeah, whatever, it's not like it did me any good. It didn't matter what I did or said she was just frozen like stone."

The images of Bella that were in Jacob's mind were almost too much to bear. She was skinnier then I remembered and dark circles like bruise framed the bottoms of her eyes. The same soulful brown eyes that had once held so much life were now like two gapping black holes. The light that had been there once had been snuffed out.

I had been the cause of her state of despair. I had broken a promise in her eyes even though I had never truly said I would never leave her. I had said I would stay as long as it was what was best for her. Seeing how broken Bella had become was a grim reminder of the fissures I had carved into my own heart.

"Enough Jacob, I get your point." I know I didn't deserve his mercy, but I asked for it nonetheless.

"Do you, Edward?"

The doubt that was echoing inside Jacob Black's mind caused me to snap my head up and look at him once more. It was then that Jacob saw the pain and guilt that were etched deep within my amber eyes.

"Okay, so maybe you do get it. But I don't think you really do. Do you really think you can repair the damage you inflicted on her? It's not like you can just slap a band-aid on it and make it all better. I'll tell you this _leechward_ if you ever hurt her again, I'll be the last thing you see."

I nodded at him before adding, "I'm counting on it Jacob Black."

I didn't want to depend on a pup to end my life, but I knew I couldn't continue without her.

My discussion with Jacob was over. I was wasting precious time here with him. His need to rip me apart would have to wait for another time. I needed to find what I could of Bella's trail. Something deep within told me to go back to her home. There had to be a clue there that I had missed.

"If you will excuse me, Jacob, I have a trail to follow."

Before I could disappear into the snow covered tree line, Jacob yelled after me.

"What makes you think you can find her trail when we couldn't?"

I froze in my tracks as I looked over my shoulder at Jacob Black.

"She calls to me. Can you say the same thing, Jacob?"

Leaving Jacob behind, I quickly made my way to the Swan residence.

* * *

Upon arriving there, I was filled with relief to see that Charlie wasn't home. It would make my task of searching Bella's room more convenient. Scaling up the tree, I gently slid the window open and slipped inside.

Glancing around the room I was unsure of where to start first. My eyes fell on Bella's desk and an invisible hand seemed to push me toward it from behind. Once there I continued to stare at it, intuition telling me an answer was hidden here.

Bella's desk was one of the tidiest spots in her room. Her pens and pencils were in the holder and her notebooks were neatly stacked. I noticed it then -- a folded piece of notebook paper that had been haphazardly slid between two of the notebooks. It seemed out of place compared to the neatness of the rest of the desk.

I snagged the edge of the paper and pulled it out. Opening it, I began to read it; it was a letter to Alice.

_Dear Alice,_

_I miss you. I'm lost without you guys. I can't even dress myself right. I put my shirt on backwards yesterday. I know he told you not to look for my future. He probably told you not to contact me._

_But I don't care. I'm drowning here, Alice. I need my best friend. I need the Cullens in__ my __life. I need all of you._

_Love, _

_Bella_

Folding the letter up, I put it back in its place. She was desperately pleading with my sister to save her. This was not what I had envisioned when I chose to leave.

The error of my decision was so clear now. I had been the one to choose, not Bella, not my family -- me and me alone. Even when I was trying not to be selfish, I was.

As I stepped forward to head back to the window, the floor board beneath my foot squeaked and moved under my weight.

"That's rather odd."

I was sure I had secured it. Sighing I knelt down and popped the board the rest of the way out. I knew what I would find there -- evidence of my existence including the CD, the plane tickets, the pictures, and the gift I wasn't allowed to give her due to the fact that I had spent money on it.

I sucked in a breath as I looked down into the gapping hole on the floor. None of what I had just described was there any longer -- it was all gone! I stuck my hand into the darkness hoping that I would at least come upon the blue velvet box. I however did not.

But who and how did they find it? I soon realized who the thief was. After two months of willing herself to die, Bella had found my Achilles heel, my selfishness. I had wanted her to move on without me, but at the same time I couldn't bear not to leave something of me behind; even if it was only for the proof that I _existed_.

I could imagine my love moving around the room, then catching her toe on the floor board causing her to fall. Of course, leave it to Bella to find what I had hidden but couldn't take from her. I was a selfish creature after all. Seconds later, as I was getting ready to leave, my cell phone started to ring. Retrieving it from my pocket I looked down at the Caller ID: _Jasper_.

That was something unexpected, what could Jasper want now? He had given me his utmost sincere apologizes months ago. I would be lying if I said that the incident hadn't damaged our relationship. I had done my best to hide my feelings of betrayal from Jasper, but it did me little good. He knew the truth, which made him even more ashamed. In the end, I held no ill will toward my brother. We are what we are and there was no true way for us to change that.

As I flipped the phone open to answer it, the voice that spoke to me was not the one I had been expecting.

"_Hello?"_

"_Oh, Edward, thank goodness!"_

"_Alice, what are you…?"_

"_Come home to New York, please. It's important."_

"_Alice, we've been through this."_

"_Don't hang up, Edward! It's Bella; she was in an accident while she was looking for us. She needs you Edward, so hurry."_

The world around me was suddenly spinning out control once more. Bella had been in an accident and Alice wanted me to hurry. Did that mean that I was running out of time? I blinked my eyes rapidly as a faint image of Bella flickered in front of me.

"_Edward, thank goodness you're safe. I'll never leave you."_

"Bella?"

The image faded as I reached out to touch it.

"Bella, don't go!"

Without realizing, I had broken into a run, but my thoughts were moving faster. An accident, what kind of accident? Alice hadn't elaborated and I hadn't thought to ask -- it didn't matter.

Home! I needed to be on the other side of the continent and I was here in Forks. I was a blur as adjusted my course to head for Fork Airport. After which I would have two more connecting flights before I would land at Ithaca Tompkins Regional Airport. From there I knew my way home would be easy.

Yet, after all of my transgressions towards her, would she even accept me into the warm arms I craved to feel around me?

She had to make it! If she didn't, then neither would I.

I banked on two options now, death by the Volturi or death by Jacob Black. I then did the one thing I had never done before -- I sent a silent prayer up to the heavens.

'_I have never in my whole existence asked anything from you. I'm asking now; please give her the will to hang on.'_


	7. Love the Medicine for the Soul

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to make this choice for her? Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. She goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time:**_

**Jasper POV**

_The simple feeling of his happiness made me joyful.__But now Edward's joy lay battered and broken before me. Bella's body portrayed Edward's emotions perfectly. Even though leaving Bella had been his choice, leaving her had broken him and had thrown him into a darkness I had never experienced before. Edward's very being seemed to have withered and died; much like the prairie grass in the hot Texas sun._

_I couldn't seem to pull my eyes away from her ashen-colored face. Carlisle had sewn the gash on her forehead closed while butterfly band aids pulled closed some of the lesser cuts on her face. A large purple and black bruise lay cross her right cheek; it seemed to blend with the dark circles under her eyes._

_I had no reason to ever believe in fate until it found me on rainy day in a small diner -- when I stumble across my own angel, announcing that I had kept her waiting. Fates cord had firmly wrapped Bella and Edward together (just as it had Alice and I)._

_Pain__ had been what had made Edward run. I however, had a strong feeling that it was going to be fate that returned him to us. Bella was Edward's liquor, just as much as Alice was mine._

_I soon found myself running a finger across Bella's crescent scar. Seconds later, Bella's body stiffened on the bed. Her heart was pounding rapidly in her chest. Right before a familiar name slipped from her lips._

"_No, Edward, don't!"_

* * *

**Chapter 7: Love the Medicine for the Soul **

**Carlisle POV**

I bolted to the bedroom at the sound of Bella's scream. She was calling out for my lost son. As soon as I entered, Jasper looked over at me with panicked-filled eyes.

"Carlisle, I didn't…"

"I know you didn't, Jasper."

It was evident that she was having a nightmare. With her body in its weakened state, I knew the stress of the dream she was having would only drain her reserves even further. We needed to keep her clam. If we didn't the result could be catastrophic.

"Jasper, we need to calm her."

I found my own nerves calming as Jasper used his talents on Bella.

"Shh, it's all right, you're safe Bella, everyone one is safe," Jasper soothed.

I winced as the half truth slipped free from Jasper's lips. Bella was indeed safe, but I had no way of knowing if Edward was. He had severed his ties to us over a month and a half ago. I hoped that Jazz's voice would be enough to soothe her.

Thankfully, our methods seemed to have worked Bella's heart beat was slowing to its normal rhythm.

"Is Bella going to be all right?"

My amber eyes locked with Jasper's bright topaz. A deep sigh escaped from within me when I answered him.

"She is for now, though I can not safely say for how long. Bella has been through so much. The emotional wounds that Edward must have caused, coupled with the trauma her body has been through the last months as well as the accident she was in today. Unless she finds the will within her, it's not promising."

Jasper voiced another question. I however knew where he was going and didn't let him finish.

"If the outcome looks that bleak then why not…"

"Because that is not what Edward wants for her," I answered in a resolute tone.

I relaxed a little as I felt Jasper's hand gently touch the top of my right shoulder.

"Carlisle, though Rosalie may be resentful for your choice to change her, know she holds no ill will toward you any more. Alice and I didn't choose this existence and neither did you. Who are we to tell Bella no when she is choosing it? Alice said she has never been so sure of a vision as the one she saw of Bella becoming one of us."

I shook my head as I pinched the bridge of my nose between my fingers. I couldn't make this decision for Bella. I had done that to Edward already. I needed to be sure if this was still what Bella wanted. Then there was Edward to consider. I was afraid of his reaction if I did this without his approval.

"I can not make that decision in good faith, knowing that Edward would despise me the rest of eternity."

"Or maybe he would thank you -- Carlisle, look at the alternative...."

My eyes snapped open to look at my adopted son.

"Why are you surprised that I said that? It's the truth. If Bella remains human, the end of her life will come and then not only would Bella be lost to us forever, but Edward as well."

Jasper looked like he was going to say something else, when his eyes shot over to Bella and widened. I detected the answer right away -- some time in her struggle in bed, Bella had torn open one of the stitches in her head and a small trickle of blood had oozed from the fissure.

Without a word to me, Jasper disappeared out the door. I quickly fixed the stitch, disposed of the blood-speckled gauze and made my way through the door after Jasper.

"Jasper?"

I found him standing in front of the door that led to his and Alice's room.

"You may go back and visit with Bella again if you would like."

The battle that raged on the inside of Jasper could be seen from not only his eyes but the way he had held himself.

"Carlisle, do you ever regret allowing me to come into your home, knowing how I lived?"

His words confused me at first, for I wasn't quite sure what he was talking about. Then I understood. Jasper, wanted to know how I felt about the lifestyle he previously chosen.

"No. Not once have I ever judged you, Jasper. And I never will. We are just as flawed as the humans we once were. We can't change that. The only thing we can do is to try and be better in this existence."

I could only hope that the sureness I was feeling was reaching Jasper as well. As I looked into his eyes once more, I noticed that the battle had calmed a little and the doubt was waning.

As I was making my way back to Edward's room to check on Bella, Jasper looked toward the top of the stairs and there stood Alice. Emmett, Rosalie and Esme were right behind her. Jasper spoke before I could, concern coating each word.

"Alice, what is it? Did you see something about Bella?"

Alice shook her head at us.

"No, it's about Edward. He went back to Forks to see Bella. When he found out that she had left, he decided to go after her, but then Laurent showed up in Forks too. Victoria's hunting Bella. Laurent was going to go kill Charlie. Edward saw that and the two of them started to fight, but I don't know how it ends. It just ends, like there's nothing. Emmett and I tried to reach him but he's not answering our calls. Edward has to be alive." Alice said, panic in her voice.

I was about to assure Alice that she was right, when I heard a soft gasp of air and then the irregular _thump, thump_ of a human heart.

_Bella!_ Her heart was arresting!

As I ran to her, the soft sorrow-filled voice of Alice echoed behind me.

"Oh God, Carlisle, do you think Bella heard our conversation? Did it have this effect on her?"

I didn't have time to wonder, Bella was dying before my eyes. Her pulse was thready and she had suddenly stopped breathing.

"Jasper, I need the crash cart that Emmett and I stole last week."

I had not been here long enough to have the credentials I had in Forks. Though Alice's suggestion to have a defibrillator had been odd two weeks ago, I had gone and stolen one from the hospital.

As I continued to blow air into Bella's lungs I prayed that her heart would keep beating. The second Jasper returned with the equipment I had asked for. I intubated Bella and attached the ambu bag.

I was very aware as Bella's heart began to beat irregularly that it would not sustain her life without intervention.

"Jasper, I need you to squeeze this bag every three seconds."

Charging the paddles to two hundred, I quickly tore open the front of Bella's nightgown. I then glanced toward my family.

"I think its best if everyone else leaves."

Alice however refused to go. Jasper gave her hand a squeeze; Alice stopped breathing as I placed the paddles to Bella's chest. The sound of the charge moving through Bella's body was almost unbearable. There was no change, so I charged it to three hundred. The force of this charge jolted Bella's body off of the bed.

Bella's broken heart continued to beat in an unproductive rhythm. I was fearful to try a stronger charge or to even try again -- how much more injury could it take before it gave up completely? I saw the battered bodies of humans every day, this however, was vastly different -- this was our Bella.

There was no way for me to deny that the words Jasper spoke earlier had merit behind them. If Bella no longer existed, Edward's death was inevitable.

We would be right back to where we had just been -- my family would be shattered. Only this time there would be no way to repair the damage.

Letting out a breath, I charged the paddles and tried again. Bella's heart suddenly thumped wildly in its last moments. The doctor in me wanted to call the time of death. The father in me wanted to scream and cry and ask her why.

Then all fell silent. Jasper's hand was frozen on the ambu bag; his eyes unable to leave Bella's expressionless face. Time seemed to stand still as reality set in: we had just lost one of our own.

Alice gasped suddenly and her eyes flicked to the doorway.

"Edward!"

The second I looked over at my son, I could almost see the cracks streaking across his skin as his eyes stared at the still body before him. I took in Edward's disheveled appearance rather quickly: the left sleeves of his shirt and jacket were gone; a huge slash was in the front of his shirt exposing his torso.

No matter the condition of his clothes, he was alive and that was all that mattered. At least for now.

"Try again," he said.

He knew the same truth that I did -- it was too late.

"Edward, it's too late to do anything more."

Edward's stance in the doorway was full of determination. His right hand was gripping the door frame.

"Try again, Carlisle. We will not give up on her. So try it again, please." he said through gritted teeth.

I couldn't help but think back to two months ago. As each day went by I would watch Edward fade before my eyes. My heart broke at the sight of the shadow that once had been my brilliant son. The light had left him gifting me with a lunar eclipse.

Now he was begging me to do this for him. He had never asked for anything before. Edward had hope that Bella would be all right. It was only a small piece of hope, but it was enough to bring a small flicker of light back into him. To deny him his plea would be sentencing him back to the dark void he had fallen into.

I charged the paddles once again while Jasper squeezed the bag inflating Bella's lungs. The force of the charge jarred Bella's body. There was a loud crack as the wood of the doorframe broke in Edward's hand. A cry of anguish erupted from Edward as he fell to his knees.

"Please Bella, come back. Don't go where I cannot follow you."

His eyes where pleading with me once again.

"Once more and that is all I will ask of you."

Looking into my son's eyes I could feel the weight of his sorrow pressing down on me. Had I still been human, I would have fallen to my knees and wept with him. Submitting Bella's body to all of this went against my better judgment. I however, would do anything to rescue this broken young man before me with the light-hearted one from months ago.

I flipped the switch charging the paddles for one more round as my son pleaded with Bella to stay with him.

"I know that this is selfish of me to ask however, I am a selfish, self-righteous being. So I'm begging you to come back to me, Bella."

Placing the paddles to her chest once more, I activated them. I was shocked to hear the movement of the heart muscle telling me she was in vtac. Bella's heart quivered again as it let loose its first thump-bump; another shock had set her heart back into sinus rhythm.

Bella's chest moved as she gasped for more air. The action made her gag reflex kick in due to the tube in her throat. Edward had already moved to her side to calm her as she regained consciousness.

"Easy love, there's a tube in your throat to help you breathe. Take a deep breath for me and then blow out as hard as you can and I'll remove it."

As Bella leaned forward, Edward seemed even more frightened to touch her than before. So I laid one hand gently on her back and the other on the front of her shoulder. Once the tube was gone, Bella pulled in another breath.

"You came back, you're really here." Bella spoke in a whispery voice of disbelief.

The weight of my son's sadness was gone from my shoulders as I watched a small smile appear on his lips.

"I did, it was inevitable for me to do so. And yes, love, I'm really here. I will never stray from your side again."

Alice and Jasper disappeared out of the room, and I remained silent as Edward gently kissed Bella's forehead and then softly pressed his lips to hers. Alice reappeared suddenly in the room, with a brand new night gown in her arms.

"Ok, now everyone out just for a minute." Alice commanded.

Just as Edward and I were about to leave, Bella spoke in a whispery voice.

"Laurent came looking for me didn't he?"

Edward's body stiffened beside me.

"Don't lie to me, Edward Cullen. You've done enough of that. Your sleeves are missing. I had a dream that you where fighting him and you lost those very sleeves in my dream. And then I saw…"

Bella's voice trailed off when Edward interrupted her.

"Not right now, Bella. Let Alice freshen you up a little and I will do the same. Then I'll come back and answer your questions."

Alice called after Edward as we left.

"There's a change of clothes for you in the bathroom, Edward."

"Thank you, Alice."

I did my best to keep my thoughts silent. I knew that Edward didn't need to be burdened with my worry for him when I knew Esme would probably give him a healthy helping of it anyway.

"Carlisle, will you stay with Bella until I've change my clothes. Just in case…" Edward asked.

I didn't need his talent to read minds to know what he was asking me. He wanted me to stay in case Bella's heart was to stop beating.

'_Edward, there may be other damage to Bella's other organs.'_

"I know, Carlisle."

Edward's head jerked to the left to look over at Jasper.

"Not yet. She still needs to experience a few more things as a human first. Then I will fold to her wishes."

My gaze traveled over to look at Jasper as well. There was no doubt in my mind what it was he had been thinking about. The same thing that he had mentioned to me minutes ago. I, however, never imagined that Edward would give Bella what she had begged him to do barely a year ago.

I thought about saying something to him and then thought better of it. I couldn't help but think back on the events of a few months ago.

_We all watched as Edward had slowly slipped back into the dark shell he had once been in. Esme was sure that I would have the answers to fix this. I knew of only one, but I had been too afraid to go against my son's wishes. _

_I sighed as I pulled Esme to me, "Giving Edward what he wanted has only caused us to lose him. I had hoped for that to never happen again."_

_My own words haunted me at that moment._

"_Perhaps, I hoped for too much, to soon?"_

_I had spoken them the night of Bella's birthday, once Edward had left to take Bella home. We each had thrown blame around. But were Esme and I to blame? Bella had told Edward she didn't want a party for her birthday. Edward had told us that. And in our own excitement we hadn't been able to tell Alice no._

"I'm finished cleaning Bella up, Carlisle."

The sound of Alice's voice floating out into the hallway brought me out of my thoughts. I turned and glanced into the bedroom.

"Thank you Alice, how does Bella seem to you?"

"Tired, but she won't go to sleep until Edward gets back. She says it's because she wants to make sure that he wasn't a dream."

Edward emerged from the bathroom sporting the clean clothes that Alice had spoken of. I resisted the urge to check Edward's stone cold skin for any signs of bite marks. I couldn't help but wonder if Laurent had managed to sink his teeth into Edward.

"He didn't Carlisle, so there is no need for you to worry."

My gaze followed Edward as he walked back into his room to be with Bella. Alice danced out of the room and into Jasper's arms. Emmett and Rosalie walked down the hall hand in hand. I was aware of Esme presence beside me, but remained silent as I watch the sight of my son and the human who had stolen his heart.

Bella spoke softly to Edward, "You promised to answer my question."

"And I will Bella, love. After you've rested, so humor me please. I'll be here when you awake up. I left my heart with you, and there it will stay."

I caught the subtle glance of Edward's eyes looking at Bella's neck. Alice had put Edward's gift back on Bella. By the look on Edward's face, it's meaning spoke volumes. He and Bella were indeed one.

I wrapped my arms around my wife as I stood there in the doorway.

"Our family is whole once more."

But somehow I couldn't shake the feeling that there was more in store for us.

* * *

**Wow, another chapter finished already. I'm amazed at myself.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	8. Even Ground

**Disclaimer: **I hold no ownership over the Characters of Twilight or New Moon all rights belong to Stephenie Meyer.

**Summary:**_ Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. Bella goes to bring Edward home._

_Previously:_

**Edward POV**

_Without realizing, I had broken into a run, but my thoughts were moving faster. An accident, what kind of accident? Alice hadn't elaborated and I hadn't thought to ask -- it didn't matter._

_Home! I needed to be on the other side of the continent and I was here in Forks. I was a blur as adjusted my course to head for Fork Airport. After which I would have two more connecting flights before I would land at Ithaca Tompkins Regional Airport. From there I knew my way home would be easy._

_Yet, after all of my transgressions towards her, would she even accept me into the warm arms I craved to feel around me?_

_She had to make it! If she didn't, then neither would I._

* * *

**Chapter 8: Even Ground**

_By TaintedDarkInuShemeeko_

**Bella POV**

What was my reality?

Physically, I sensed I was finally back where I belonged, with the Cullens. But Edward was not here.

Yet, somehow, I _had_ been with him. I saw him, I felt his presence. The vision replayed in my brain in perfect clarity: Edward was fighting Laurent and then several super-sized wolves appear. How was Edward going to fend off all of them?

Edward needed me; I wanted so badly to jump out of the bed I was lying in and go to him, whatever reality he existed in.

Yet no matter how hard I tried, my eyes wouldn't open. It felt as though the connections between my mind and my body were severed. I could hear the voices around me, but couldn't respond. For now, I was a prisoner in my own battered body. It was maddening!

The whispering voices in my physical world suddenly stopped and I could just make out the sound of Jasper's voice in the distance.

"_Alice, what is it? Did you see…about Bella?"_

Alice's bell-like voice was higher then I remembered it being.

"_It's about Edward. He went back to Forks to see Bella. When he found out that she had left, he decided to go after her, but then Laurent showed up in Forks too. Victoria's hunting Bella. Laurent was going to go kill Charlie. Edward saw that and the two of them started to fight, but I don't know how it ends. It just ends, like there's nothing. Emmett and I tried to reach him but he's not answering our calls. Edward has to be alive." _

The breath I was going to exhale was suddenly stuck in my throat. I had to have heard Alice wrong. If Edward had disappeared from Alice's sight, then it could only mean one thing, Edward was…_dead_.

No, it was impossible, Edward couldn't be dead!

Panic welled up inside me, causing my heart to beat wildly in my chest as Alice's words echoed inside my head.

"_But then Laurent showed up in Forks too."_

I had been with him! My dream had been more than just a vision brought on by a head injury, it was real! How was that possible? But the joyous realization was short lived as reality crashed down on me. It had happened in my vision and then in Alice's vision. Edward had faced Laurent and the massive wolves....and he hadn't survived.

Edward was much more than my moon. He was the anchor that kept me from sinking. And he was gone now. With my reason to live gone, there was nothing left for me to do, nothing left to hope for, and nothing to hang on to. If Edward was gone, there was no real reason for me to continue living. I couldn't exist in a world that Edward wasn't a part of.

I longed to feel his cold embrace again. If dying was the only way for me to do that, then I was ready for it. I let go -- sinking slowly and painlessly into a dark abyss.

* * *

**Edward POV**

The flight back to Ithaca Tompkins Regional Airport wasn't as fast as I would have liked. It was, however, faster than if I had tried to run the rest of the way home. I had neglected to change my clothes before heading toward Forks Airport.

Curiosity and concern was thrown at me from every human that looked at me. I had no idea how disheveled my appearance was until I caught images of myself in the minds of the flight crew as I boarded my private flight.

"Are you all right, Mister Cullen?"

"I'm just fine, Harold," I responded taking a quick glance at his name badge. "Will the plane be taking off soon? I'm in a bit of a rush," I asked as I flashed him a quick smile to put his mind at ease.

As always it worked and the pilot seemed to forget about my appearance for the moment.

"Yes, of course sir."

The image from the pilot's mind showed me there was a slight bit of bruising under my eyes from my lack of feeding in addition to a small smudge of dirt on my face and a few bits of dried grass in my hair. My shirt and jacket were tattered and torn. I looked like some street urchin. It was no wonder he asked me if I was all right. In my haste to return home to New York, I hadn't given my appearance any thought.

As the pilot moved back to the cockpit, Jenny, the flight attendant, came to see if I need anything before the plane took off. I requested a glass of water. Once Jenny had poured the spring water into a glass, she proceeded to ask if there was anything else she could get me. I kindly told her no, allowing her to return to her place in the back of the plane. I was in no mood or condition to be the center of attention.

As I wet my lips with the water, my mind replayed my conversation with Alice. The thought of all the different accidents Bella could have been involved in made my mind spin, but one possibility stood out among them all -- Victoria had found Bella. If she was the cause of Bella's injury, I would make it my life's sole purpose to find a way to make Victoria's demise slow and very painful.

Another thought then dawned on me, what if Jacob had been right. If Bella had runaway to find me and my family, there was a very strong likelihood I was to blame for her current condition. Yet, there was still one thing that baffled me. How had Bella found my family?

"_Hang on Bella; I'm on my way back to you. Just hang on."_

I wasted no time in getting off the plane the second that it was clear to disembark, not worrying about whether or not any of the humans took any notice. Once I was sure no one was watching me, I picked up speed until I surpassed what the human eye could see.

As I raced to our home, I reassured myself that Carlisle would do everything within his power to stabilize Bella's condition. I was holding onto this hope by a thin cord. I knew that I had a small window of time before the cord snapped and all hope was lost to me.

I was a half a mile from the house when I heard the sound of a defibrillator being charged up. No! It couldn't be. It just couldn't be. Not like this, it couldn't end like this! There were so many things that I needed to tell her; so many things that she needed to experience. There were things I wanted to show her, wanted to watch her experience. Somehow I found it within me to move faster.

The second I passed through the thin tree line, frantic thoughts from my family started to envelop me. Their thoughts were in such disarray it was almost too much for me to bear.

One of Carlisle's thoughts rang out louder than the others.

'_Why did you give up Bella? This will be Edward's undoing.'_

I had just run out of time. The cord snapped.

_I snapped_. Chaos overtook my brain and I wondered if vampires could go insane.

But before I could sink into the darkness that threatened me, I knew I had to see her with my own two eyes. I was just seconds away from her. As I sped through the yard and front door, Rosalie and Emmett let their surprise in seeing me show in their thoughts. Esme's thoughts were not just filled with surprise, but with relief as well.

'_Edward, thank goodness, you're safe. Bella she's…'_

I paid Esme's thoughts little heed as I bolted past her on my way up the spiral staircase. Other then the pounding of my feet, the house was silent -- the thump of Bella's heart was non-existed.

"Edward!"

I froze in the doorway of my bedroom. Alice was shocked by my sudden appearance -- why hadn't she seen me returning?

"Try again," my voice shook as I pleaded.

"Edward, it's too late to do anything more," Carlisle spoke his thoughts.

There was no need for him to tell me this. I was already aware of it all yet I refused to fold. If Bella was lost to me, there was no reason for me to continue to exist. I gripped the door frame with my right hand.

"Try again, Carlisle. She didn't give up on us; we will not give up on her. So try it again_, please_." I said through gritted teeth. It pained me to ask Carlisle to do this for me. I knew it went against everything that he believed in as a doctor.

Bella had faith in us and our love even during a time when I hadn't been so sure. There were dozens of times when I was afraid of hurting her and she would gently remind me of how sure she was of us—_"You won't hurt me."_ Bella had faith when I had none. It was my turn to believe in her.

Only now was it clear that I had been wrong about her moving on without me.

The moment that my dark amber eyes met Carlisle's topaz ones, I felt him give into my wishes.

'_All right, Edward, I'll try it again.'_

Jasper continued to squeeze the ambu bag inflating Bella's lungs as Carlisle charged the paddles one more time. Once they were charged, Carlisle glanced at me before placing them on her chest.

'_Here goes, Edward. Perhaps you shouldn't watch.'_

"I'll be fine."

'_Please, God let this work. I can't bear the thought of losing him again.'_

I was aware of Carlisle's silent prayer. I even knew the meaning behind it. Still I focused everything I had on Bella. Nothing could have prepared for the utter torment I would feel as the charge from the defibrillator surged through Bella's body lifting it up off of the bed. My grip on the doorframe tightened, splintering the wood within my grip. The sight of her lifeless body recoiling from the force of the charge pulled at the fraying cord that held my small sliver of hope. An anguished cry erupted from within as my knees gave out on me; the strength to hold myself up was gone.

On my knees, I could only plead with her now. "Please Bella, come back. Don't go where I cannot follow you."

There was no response from Bella's body; she was gone because of me. Bella hadn't even known the truth of how deep my feelings for her went.

No, I couldn't give up just yet! So I was left with only one thing to do -- plead with Carlisle one last time.

"Once more and that is all I will ask of you," a sob broke free from inside my throat.

My gaze never left Carlisle as he flipped the switch on the defibrillator, charging the paddles one last time. I continued my pleas.

"I know that this is selfish of me to ask, however, I am a selfish, self-righteous being. So I'm begging you to come back to me, Bella."

My eyes shot up to look at Carlisle his thought broke into my mind.

'_It's impossible.'_

Startled by the sound, I looked up at Bella's chest as her heart burst into vtac. Bella's heart quivered once more as it let loose its first thump-bump after another shock had set her heart into sinus rhythm.

Her chest heaved upward as she gasped for more air. The action made her gag reflex kick in responding to the tube in her throat. I moved quickly to Bella's side to calm her as she regained consciousness.

I spoke to her in a soothing voice, "Easy love, there's a tube in your throat to help you breathe. Take a deep breath for me and then blow out as hard as you can and I'll remove it."

I brushed a stray strand of her hair back as Bella leaned forward towards me. Taking in her emaciated appearance I became to frighten to touch her now more then ever before. Carlisle seemed to understand my unease. He laid one hand gently on her back and the other on the front of her shoulder to brace her. Once the tube was gone, Bella pulled in another breath.

"You came back, you're really here." She spoke in a whispery voice of disbelief.

At her words, I couldn't stop the small lop-sided smile that graced my lips as I realized the words I was about to speak out loud were the absolute, undeniable truth.

"I did, it was inevitable for me to do so. And yes, love, I'm really here. I will never stray from your side again."

I paid little attention to Alice and Jasper as they left the bedroom. My focus was completely on Bella. I pressed a gentle kiss on her forehead and then placed a chaste kiss on her lips. Her skin was starting to warm again.

Alice returned with a new nightgown in hand.

"Ok, now everyone out just for a minute," Alice voiced.

'_That means you too, Edward.'_

My eyes drifted up to meet Alice's. She then pleaded with me.

'_Please, Edward, it will just be for a minute. Bella needs this time to collect herself and cover up -- her body is partially exposed. Trust me, Edward.'_

I nodded my head slightly at her. As I turned to leave with Carlisle, Bella's voice froze me in my tracks.

"Laurent came looking for me didn't he?"

I had not planned for this yet; her question caught me off guard. She then went in for the kill.

"Don't lie to me, Edward Cullen. You've done enough of that. Your sleeves are missing. I had a dream that you where fighting him and you lost those very sleeves in my dream. And then I saw…"

Now was not the time, she had almost died and she needed to rest. I cut her off before she could continue.

"Not right now, Bella. Let Alice freshen you up a little and I will do the same. Then I'll come back and answer your questions." I sighed toward the end. The fear of losing her had me willing to give into whatever she wanted.

Alice knew I was breaking.

'_Go on Edward, you've seen what you look like. Do you really want Bella to see you like this? To see how horrible you look, it'll only make her worry more about you.'_

"All right, Alice." I spoke soft enough for only Alice and Carlisle to hear.

As I was leaving with Carlisle, Alice called after me.

"There's a change of clothes for you in the bathroom, Edward."

"Thank you, Alice." When I spoke my words were sincere.

Leaving Bella's side wasn't easy, however I knew Alice was right. Walking out into the hallway, I caught hold of Carlisle's thoughts.

'_It's good to see you, son. And I'll leave it at that.'_

"Carlisle, will you stay with Bella until I've change my clothes? Just in case…" I trailed off toward the end.

'_Edward, there may be other damage to Bella's other organs.'_

"I know, Carlisle."

'_Why not change her now, Edward? Wouldn't it solve all of the panic you're feeling at the thought of losing her?'_

My head jerked to the left to look over at Jasper in response to his questioning thought.

"Not yet. She still needs to experience a few more things as a human first. Then I will fold to her wishes."

My words kept Jasper from saying anything else. I then headed toward the bathroom to get a shower.

Even with my cold hard skin, the hot water from the shower had the calming effect I was longing for. It also gave me time to think over a few things as well.

I had lost her once by my own choosing, and then again without being here. Only to have her given back to me, I didn't know how or why it had happened, I was just glad that it had. When I left Bella, I done so convinced she would live a safer and happier life without me. Yet the only thing I succeeding in doing was leaving her open to an attack by Laurent and Victoria. I don't know how she came to be lying in a bed in my room after being cradled in death's arms, I couldn't deny this may be my only chance to set things right. For whatever reason, fate had decided we were meant to be together. I couldn't fight that reality any longer. I couldn't screw this up again. If I did I knew very well what the outcome would be.

I knew once I returned to my room, Bella would want me to answer her questions. She would not accept anything less than my honest answers. I owed her at least that much.

*** * ***

**Bella POV**

I shivered slightly as Alice ran a warm wet cloth down across my chest. She then ran it across the side of my face. Alice froze the second she saw me shiver.

"Sorry about that. I know the last thing you need is something cold against you."

Alice removed the tattered nightgown from my body. I winced as she gently lifted me up.

"Oh, Bella…I'm sorry, I'm doing this as gently as I can."

"I know you are, Alice." I gave her a weak smile.

My chest was sore and it felt like my bruises had bruises. I didn't have a special talent like Alice, Jasper or even Edward, but I could tell from just looking at Alice how much my almost dying had affected her.

After dressing me, she brushed my hair with a loving touch. As she busied herself with the task at hand, I let my eyes wander over the room that I knew was Edward's. The books and music were all familiar to me. My gaze fell on the stand next to the bed. There was something sliver lying on it. I knew what it was right away. It was the sliver chain and heart pendant that Edward had hidden with the rest of my birthday gifts.

Alice noticed where my gaze had stopped. She reached out and snatched it up in her hand.

"Here, I'll put this back where it belongs."

As she undid the clasp to put it back on me, my right hand shot up and held the sliver heart to my own.

"I told Edward that you would love it. He didn't really spend a lot of money on it. It was something I had purchased for myself. I just never got around to pairing it with the outfit I wanted too. The engraving part was all Edward."

Her fingers brushed a few strands of my hair out of my face as she spoke.

"Bella, you should get some sleep. You died and some how you came back, you need your rest."

I didn't want to hear anything about sleeping -- not yet. Not until I was sure that Edward had been real.

"No, no sleep, not until I know that Edward wasn't a dream."

"Bella, you're not making any sense, of course he's real! I saw him too, we all did," she replied in an annoyed tone.

"I have to be sure, Alice."

"Okay, Bella, if it's what you need."

Securing Alice's approval, I relaxed more on the bed as Alice picked up what was left of my nightgown. Flashing me a reluctant look she called out to Carlisle.

"I'm finished cleaning Bella up, Carlisle."

A few seconds later, Edward walked into the bedroom.

I spoke with as much determination in my voice as I could muster as my throat was still sore from the tube that had been there.

"You promised to answer my question."

Edward's eyes never left mine as he spoke.

"And I will Bella, love. After you've rested, so humor me please. I'll be here when you awake up." Edward's eyes then moved from mine to the necklace I was wearing, "I left my heart with you, and there it will stay."

"Why did you hide it from me, the necklace I'm wearing?"

"Bella…"

He was trying to change the subject; I couldn't let him do that.

"Don't do that, Edward. Don't try to avoid my question. Just answer me. Why did you leave me after everything we've been through? I begged you not to leave me. Instead of staying, you left me."

Still having more to say I continued.

"I wandered the cold, wet woods for over an hour before I found my way home again." I shook with the rage I had shoved away but was now bubbling up to the surface.

"But it wasn't home to me anymore. My home was gone, and yet you just thought that I would _forget_ you. No more lying to me, Edward. Answer my questions first and then I'll sleep once I know the truth."

I could tell by looking at him that he was breaking. It hurt to see it, but it also filled me with a sense of relief, he needed to know what his leaving had done to me. I could see it was painful for him to hear.

"All right, yes, Laurent came there to check up on you, per Victoria's request. He however, had another plan in mind. Laurent remembered how sweet your blood smelled last spring. The chance to get to taste it was just too tempting. When he realized that Victoria had been wrong and you weren't there, Laurent decided to go after your father. The things he planned to do...I couldn't allow it to happen."

The thought of Laurent causing any kind of harm to Charlie made me sick to my stomach. Edward took notice of my unease.

"He didn't even make it out of the meadow."

Relief flooded me, but there was something else I need to know about.

"I need to know about the wolves. I saw them in my dream; they were the same height as a horse. How did you get away from them?"

Edward shook his head at me.

"Our family, we have a treaty with them, made over a century ago. We swore to stay off their land and to never bite a human. In exchange they promised to leave us alone."

"Oh," was the only word I could muster.

After that I could feel my eyelids growing heavy as each second ticked by. It didn't go unnoticed by Edward.

"Sleep, Bella. Just close your eyes and rest awhile. I promise you that I will be right by your side until you wake up."

I wanted to believe him, but I wasn't ready to trust him yet. He had run away and left me broken. One lone tear slid free and down my cheek. Edward caught it and wiped it away.

"I want to trust you, Edward. I really do, but I can't. I can't trust any of you right now. You're not the only one that left me alone out there in the cold and wet; my best friend left me there too. Her brother told her to leave me alone and she just did what he told her to do, not what I needed."

I let out a shaky breath before going on.

"So I'm going to tell you this now instead of later. I would have rather died the night of my birthday than to have gone through the pain that I have these last two months without you. I hate all of you so much right now, but I love you at the same time too. I'll be able to forgive you some time, I know I will, but first I have to be able to forgive myself."

His eyes reflected the pain my words had caused. It was also in his voice when he spoke.

"Bella, I can understand your anger toward me and my family. There is one thing I don't understand, why do you need to forgive yourself?"

"I have to forgive myself because the stupid lamb that I am was dumb enough to believe the lie that you spun in front of me.

I had expected him to get up and walk out on me, but he didn't. He stayed by my side. Edward gently took my right hand in his and brought it to his lips and kissed it.

"I have waited a century to find you. I have suffered in agony over my decision to leave you, dwelling on the very edge of insanity for months. I believe I can wait however long it takes you to forgive my callousness."

He leaned forward and placed a kiss on my forehead.

"I will never part from your side again."

My hand slid up to again hold the silver heart resting on my chest. Finding it hidden under the floor boards had restored my hope, and I was not giving up on that. That tiny part of me, knew each one of his words held a merit of truth behind it, but part of me just couldn't accept them, not yet.

**A/N: Lunar Eclipse has been nominated for a Indie Award for Best Action or Drama Story so don't forget to vote.**

http://theindietwificawards(dot)com/vote(dot)aspx

**Voting ends March 2nd!**

**Thanks for choosing Lunar Eclipse **

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	9. Living & Forgiveness

**Disclaimer: **I hold no ownership over the Characters of Twilight or New Moon all rights belong to Stephenie Meyer.

**Summary:**_ Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. Bella goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last time:**_

_**Bella POV**_

_I had expected him to get up and walk out on me, but he didn't. He stayed by my side. Edward gently took my right hand in his and brought it to his lips and kissed it._

_"I have waited a century to find you. I have suffered in agony over my decision to leave you, dwelling on the very edge of insanity for months. I believe I can wait however long it takes you to forgive my callousness."_

_He leaned forward and placed a kiss on my forehead._

_"I will never part from your side again."_

_My hand slid up to again hold the silver heart resting on my chest. Finding it hidden under the floor boards had restored my hope, and I was not giving up on that. That tiny part of me knew each one of his words held a merit of truth behind it, but part of me just couldn't accept them, not yet._

**Chapter 9: Living & Forgiveness **

**Alice POV**

They were both broken and wounded now. One question remained, how do you remove a lunar eclipse?

_With time_ – I answered my own question. Only in time would we see if Bella and Edward could heal their emotional scars.

However, for Bella, there was still a long road to her physical healing. They would have to see to that first.

Taking note of the date on the calendar that read December 22, I made a list of things I wanted to do for our first Christmas with Bella.

Soon Carlisle and Esme appeared in the doorway of my room.

"Alice…"

"Don't worry, Carlisle, I already know what you're going to say. I will reign myself in this time, I promise."

Even though I knew that Carlisle and Esme were right, it was going to be tough not to go all out for Christmas. Yet if I was honest with myself, I knew I was only trying to distract myself from the words I overheard Bella speak several days ago.

"_My best friend left me there too. Her brother told her to leave me alone and she just did what he told her to do, not what I needed."_

The sound of those words dug deep inside of me. However, there was no way for me to deny them. Bella was right. No one controlled me. I could have stayed with her. My choice had been to follow my family and at the same time I had been torn. Being away from Bella was worse than having my no-limit credit card cut in half.

"_We're leaving Forks; it's the only way to protect her, Alice." Edward's voice had been cold yet full of pain._

"_How do you know that, Edward? Since when were you granted the gift of foresight?" I fumed._

_Edward didn't even fully turn to face me as he spoke._

"_I just know. I seem to be her source of danger. She'll be safer if I'm not here -- if we all weren't here. And don't go looking for her future either, Alice."_

Bella was my family too. She was the little sister I couldn't remember and the one I have always wanted. Leaving her was the hardest thing for me to do.

Blinking, I shook the thoughts of my past regrets from my head. Focusing on what the styles for the New Year would be, I tiptoed down the hall to peek in on Edward and Bella. Her heart was beating a slow, even rhythm signaling that she was sleeping. I quickly took note of the IV Carlisle and Edward had persuaded Bella into having. It would gave her the fluid and nutrients her human body needed.

I took in Edward appearance next. He sat forward in the chair next to the Bella's bed; his hands folded under his chin and his elbows resting on his legs.

He heard me.

"Go away, Alice." He spoke in a whispery voice without removing his gaze from Bella.

"Edward you should eat."

"I will later, Alice."

I wasn't so sure about that.

"You said that two days ago, Edward. Carlisle said that Bella will wake up when her body is ready. It's using this time to heal."

"I know that," was the only response I got in return.

He had been sitting in that same spot for the last three days! In his posed stillness, he reminded me of the Thinker that sat in the Rodin Museum in Paris.

I knew he was taking his promise to Bella that he'd be there when she woke up very seriously. That was Edward – so extreme. First he leaves her and then he is practically chained to her side. Surely, Bella would want him to hunt instead of slowing staving at her bedside.

"Then get up and go hunting, you need the blood," I replied back to him in a firm voice.

He decisively set his jaw in place and remained seated.

His stubbornness aggravated me. I just wanted him to do something!

Maybe it was because I was angry at myself for leaving Bella behind. I wanted Edward to get mad at me and yell at me. Most of all I wanted him to act alive again.

Jasper appeared behind me.

"What are you up to, Alice? I've never felt so many things pouring off you at once."

Pushing my guilty feelings aside, I smiled at him.

"Edward is going to turn to stone if he doesn't move soon. I've got an idea."

I headed over to where we kept the car keys with my intrigued husband in tow. Taking Edward's keys in hand, I made my way to his car.

Edward didn't love his Volvo more than Bella, but he did love it.

'_Edward, if you don't come down here right now and hunt, I'll total your Volvo.'_

The only thing that greeted me at first was silence.

Edward then spoke, "No, you won't. It's not in your nature to hurt a car on purpose."

Well, he had me there, because I couldn't do it. Opening the door I slid in and started the engine.

Edward's stern voice sounded from his bedroom window.

"Alice."

'_You're right it's not in me. I could, however, trade it in for a stylish yellow Porsche.'_

"You wouldn't," was Edward's reply.

Pulling his car out of the garage, I looked up to his window to see him glaring down at me. I just smiled at him.

"Try me, Edward."

Stepping on the gas the silver car sped down the winding driveway. If I was right he should be appearing about….

Edward was suddenly standing in the driveway in front of the car.

"Get out of my car, Alice."

"No," was my smug remark. _'Yesterday you didn't care if I totaled your car. You told me you'd just buy a new one. What's so different about today?'_

After a few seconds I understood.

"Carlisle said no to you buying a new one, didn't he?"

Edward narrowed his onyx eyes at me.

"Either get out, Alice or put it back," he replied through gritted teeth.

He then turned around to leave. That was the crack that broke the heel on the Jimmy Choos. Getting out of the car with speed Wonder Woman would marvel at, I stood in Edward's path.

"That's it, Edward, I can't take it any more! You're moping around is not helping any of us. Bella is here and she's alive, so could you at least _pretend_ to be alive too. She's going to wake up Edward; you just have to give her a chance too. Your hovering isn't going to make her wake up any faster."

At my last statement Edward looked away from me. I reached out to put a hand on his shoulder; he made no move to flinch out of my touch.

"Edward, please if you won't go hunting for us, will you do it for Bella? You wouldn't want her to see you like this?"

My questions were only answered by silence as Edward must have been examining himself through my mind's eye. At last he spoke.

"No. I don't want her to see me like this."

As if on cue, Emmett, Rosalie and Jazz appeared at his side. Jazz seemed to be the voice of reason, mostly because he was influencing Edward just a little bit.

"Come on, Edward, Alice is right. Come hunting with the three of us. Bella couldn't be in better hands then Carlisle's."

"All right, I'll go hunting, even though you're cheating, Jasper." Edward grated as he tried not to smile.

"My deepest apologizes, Edward, it's for your own good."

I smiled slightly as the four of them headed off into the woods just as a vision took hold -- a good one. Edward was laughing and joking with Emmett, Jasper and even Rosalie. I knew what I saw was going to be temporary but at least for a while we had _Edward_ back.

Heading back to the house, I made my way to Edward and Bella's room. It seemed so right, and at the same time it felt a little strange to be saying at this point. Now that Edward was gone I could clean Bella up without Edward being underfoot.

The smell of green tea and acai berry with a swirl of cinnamon greeted my senses before I reached the door. It was a telltale sign that Carlisle was with Bella at the moment.

Knowing that, I paused outside the bedroom door until Carlisle's voice called me forward.

"You may come in, Alice."

Peeking around the corner, I made my way into the room.

"How's Bella doing?" I asked in a strained voice.

I knew the answer; I just wanted to hear Carlisle say it. The sound of Carlisle's voice always made me feel better.

"She's doing quite well considering things."

"Do you have any idea when she might wake up?"

Carlisle's face fell at my question.

"That Alice, I'm afraid, is completely up to Bella."

A happy ending for Edward and Bella--that's all we had wanted. Fate was more than cruel, it played dirty. Just as it looked like Edward and Bella were reaching an understanding, Bella had slipped into a deep sleep. Carlisle assured us this was Bella's body's way of self healing. Her body had been pressed to its human limits and this almost coma-like state would help her heal not only from the physical trauma her body had been through but the emotional trauma as well.

Carlisle didn't excuse himself from my presence yet. He stood there studying me before speaking.

"Esme and I both knew the pull between the two of them. We could see it when they were together. Yet we did nothing to deter him from leaving her. We are just as much at fault."

It hurt me to watch as Carlisle blamed himself for the events that led to this current situation.

"Carlisle, it's not your fault you know. Like I've said before we're all to blame. We thought we were doing the right thing – thinking this was between Bella and Edward and we should stay out of it. But in the end, his decision had consequences for all of us; we just couldn't see that at the time."

Walking over to Bella's bed I looked down at her unconscious form. Thankfully her alabaster skin was starting to regain some color, hopefully indicating she would wake up soon.

I had seen Bella waking up from her unconscious state, the_ when_ part however had been eluding me. There was one other thing I was sure of as well, one day Bella would be one of us. Fate had decided what path Bella was going to travel on the day she was born. Bella had embraced that fate – how much more will it take before Edward accepts his role in her destiny?

The sound of Carlisle's voice interrupted my thoughts.

"Well then, Alice, I will leave the rest of Bella's needs to you."

I put on one of my biggest grins for Carlisle.

"Yep, you bet, Carlisle. It'll be nice to tend to Bella without Edward's constant hovering."

Carlisle gave me a small smile and a nod as he excused himself from the room, closing the door behind him. A few seconds later, there was a soft knock on the door.

"Thanks Esme."

At the sound of my words the door opened slowly and Esme poked her head into the room.

"I brought some lavender bath soap too. Edward makes giving Bella a proper sponge bath almost impossible, doesn't he?"

Despite the heartache of the situation that now lay before us, I laughed lightly at Esme's words.

"That he does."

As I gently washed the side of Bella's face, I took note of how the bruise on the side of her face was now a purplish yellow. The stitches near her hairline remained, but all of the butterfly bandages had been removed. Bella's left wrist remain in a brace, as did her right knee.

Esme was silent as we went along with our loving chore. As I was slipping a light blue flannel nightgown on Bella, laying her gently back in the bed, I stifled a gasp of happiness as Bella's eyes started to flutter open. Esme called out for Carlisle.

At the sound of Esme's slightly panicked voice, Carlisle hurried into the room.

"Esme, dear what is it? What happened?"

There was no containing my excitement.

"It's Bella -- she's waking up."

At the sight of Bella's fluttering eyelashes, Carlisle moved to Bella's bedside.

"Bella, it's Carlisle. How are you feeling? "

Bella seemed to be a little confused by Carlisle's words as she yawned lightly.

"Good, kind of like I've been asleep all day. I didn't die again did I?"

Carlisle chuckled softly at Bella's question.

"No, no you didn't, Bella. You have however been asleep for three days now. You gave us all quite a scare."

"Edward?" Bella's eyes darted around the room looking for him.

I moved to the other side of the bed, giving her a gentle hug, before I answered her question.

"I'm so happy to see you awake. As for Edward, he's fine, Bella. He hasn't left your side since you went to sleep. I had to get a little dirty today to get him to go hunting."

"You mean you had Jasper get dirty for you."

I was taken by surprise at the sound of Edward's voice. I hadn't seen him coming back yet. What was going on with me? Was I losing my touch?

"So, Edward, how was your hunt?" I asked, though I knew the answer just by looking at his face.

His eyes were bright gold in color and the dark bruises under his eyes were gone. It was apparent that Edward had stuffed himself in a similar fashion of my Jazz. Jasper's reason for gorging was so it would be safer for him to be around Bella. Edward's was so he wouldn't have to leave Bella's side.

There was an awkward silence and I could feel the shameful guilt that hung in the air. Edward wasn't completely forgiven and neither was I.

"Carlisle, would it be okay for me to have some water and some crackers? You know to start me out on?"

Carlisle smiled at Bella before speaking.

"I take it that you're feeling hunger, then?"

"Is that a bad thing?"

Carlisle chuckled again like he had earlier.

"No, not at all Bella, it's a very good sign."

Bella looked to her left at Edward and me.

"Um, I need a human moment."

Edward moved to lift Bella from the bed only to be stopped.

"Would it be okay if Alice did it?"

Hurt at Bella's request flickered within Edward's eyes for a second before disappearing.

"Of course, Bella love."

Once I had helped Bella get settled on the toilet, she reached out and took hold of the sleeve of my shirt.

"Alice, how's Jasper doing?"

"He's fine, but wouldn't you rather hear it from him."

Bella nodded her head, "You're right."

Smiling at my best friend I asked, "All done?"

Bella nodded her response. As I helped her to her feet, Bella asked me something I thought I would never hear.

"Alice, would you buy me a couple of new outfits?"

I stood there for a few seconds just staring at her before I squealed, "Do you really mean it, Bella?"

Her response was thoughtful as she spoke.

"Well, I'm going to need a few things if I'm going to be staying here. The four sets of clothes I brought with me won't last long."

This was Bella's way of telling me she had forgiven me. But then her face fell.

"I can stay here, can't I? You're not going to send me away?"

As I was about to answer her, Edward spoke from the other room.

"No one here is going to send you away, love."

Just as I was about to lift Bella up into my arms she stopped me.

"I want to try a few steps on my own. How can I get stronger if you guys carry me everywhere?"

I was greeted by an anxious Edward as I opened the bathroom door.

"May I, Bella?" he asked, hope coated each word.

Bella just nodded to him. So I handed her over.

Edward slipped his arms gently under her arms holding them outward as he did so. I smiled as I noticed that Edward was wearing the smoke colored long-sleeved thermal shirt I had laid out earlier under his light grey t-shirt. Bella tentatively placed her hands on Edward's arms.

"You're not exactly warm, but you're not cold either. Just comfortable," Bella's voice whispered.

'_See Edward, isn't it a good thing you put it on.'_

"Yes, Alice, thank you."

I looked at Edward and winked before giving Bella my attention.

"Well, Bella, if you don't need me I think I have some shopping to do."

Placing a kiss on Bella's cheek, I danced the rest of the way down the hall. The sound of Jasper's voice made me twirl on my toes.

"Well, now you're excited about something, _darlin'_."

Jasper was right -- I was beaming.

"And why shouldn't I be? Our family is whole again. Bella is going to recover and she gave me permission to go shopping for her!"

Jasper smiled at me as he shook his head.

"I should have known your excitement had to do something with clothes."

Smiling I let Jasper pull me into his arms as I placed my lips to his.

"Shopping is my second passion, Jazzy. You're my first."

Grinning at me, Jasper deepened our kiss before pulling away.

"Go and enjoy your chance to shop for Bella."

Knowing that Carlisle would say yes, I snatched up the keys to his Mercedes and called to him as I moved toward the door.

"Carlisle, I'm going to borrow your car."

"That will be fine, Alice," his response just as I had predicted.

Popping the door open I was getting ready to climb in when a vision hit, shaking me to my core. I stifled a cry as the images assaulted my mind.

_The images were foggy at first and then they started to clear revealing four figures cloaked in darkness moving out of the fog._

"_Demetri, I thought you said he was here?"_

"_He was Jane, but now he's gone."_

"_Find him! Edward Cullen is to be judged by Master Aro."_

_The image then changed and crimson-eyed newborns replaced them. They were terrorizing the city of Seattle and the town of Forks. I cried out as blood splattered and sprayed in front of me. Immobilized by the horrific sight, I watched as the Volturi guard gathered all of the newborns up like cattle into an open field. My eyes widened as I took in the faces of three of the Newborns. I knew them. I know I did, but the fog was making it impossible to see clearly._

"Alice, what has you so upset, what are you seeing?"

Alerted by my sudden shift in emotion, Jasper had appeared at my side. The sound of his soothing voice was pulling me out of my vision. I couldn't seem to find my voice at first to answer Jasper's question.

"The Volturi are searching for Edward so he can be judged. Then the images changed and I saw an army of Newborns wreaking havoc on Seattle before moving into Forks. All the humans they killed...."

My eyes locked with Edward's as he stood wide-eyed on the porch.

'_Edward, I knew three of the newborns in my vision. Could you see who they were?'_

Edward's reply left me frozen.

"No, I couldn't make it out either."

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait Alice was not being helpful. I hope you enjoyed. The next installment is in Emoward Ch. 10: Changing Course.**

**Hit that button -- you know you want to. Thanks for reading and reviewing.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	10. Changing Course

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last time:**_

_**Alice POV **_

_A happy ending for Edward and Bella-that's all we had wanted. Fate was more than cruel, it played dirty. Just as it looked like Edward and Bella were reaching an understanding, Bella had slipped into a deep sleep. Carlisle assured us this was Bella's body's way of self healing. Her body had been pressed to its human limits and this almost coma-like state would help her heal not only from the physical trauma her body had been through but the emotional trauma as well._

_Carlisle didn't excuse himself from my presence yet. He stood there studying me before speaking._

"_Esme and I both knew the pull between the two of them. We could see it when they were together. Yet we did nothing to deter him from leaving her. We are just as much at fault."_

_It hurt me to watch as Carlisle blamed himself for the events that led to this current situation._

**Chapter 10: Changing Course**

**Edward POV**

No matter what happened, it always felt like fate was laughing in our faces. Getting Bella to rest had been a struggle and I gave a sigh of relief when she finally fell asleep. I remained by her side as she slept. As the light of morning stained the sky pink and orange erasing the deep blue grey of night, I gave Bella's unwillingness to wake up little thought. She had been through so much over the last couple of days, maybe this was to be expected.

As the day wore on she still hadn't stirred from her slumber. My concern for her started to grow. Carlisle had assured me that Bella's vitals were normal. It wasn't enough to keep me from calling out to him.

"Carlisle."

'_I'll be right there, Edward.'_

His thoughts to my request were simple. Since my return everyone seemed to be walking on egg shells around me. Before I could give it any more consideration, Carlisle appeared in the door way of my room.

"Carlisle, shouldn't Bella have woken up by now?"

'_Her body has been through so much. It's possible the head injury was more than I thought but…'_

Carlisle's thoughts trail off as he continued to watch me cautiously. I responded to him before he could finish.

"I've all ready thought of that and I agree with you."

His ocher eyes continued to watch me as he warily made his way over to Bella's side, almost as if he was afraid of me. His thoughts, however, were now shielded from me.

"Carlisle, what is it?"

"I apologize, Edward, you haven't been yourself these last couple of days."

Once again I tried to get a glimpse of what Carlisle was thinking. The only thing I could get a hold on was his deep worry for Bella.

'_Edward, need I remind you of the limits of the human body? Bella's has been through a lot. Not just physically. I have no doubt emotionally as well.'_

I was very well aware what Carlisle was referring to. Even though he didn't press me, I couldn't help but think he was throwing it in my face as if it wasn't evident whenever I took in Bella's frail form.

"Yes, Carlisle, I'm _very_ much aware of the physical, not to mention emotional trauma Bella has suffered because of me!"

'_Edward, son, you know I didn't mean to imply that you weren't aware. I was merely trying to reassure you that given time, Bella will awake up again. There is nothing to say that she won't.'_

Hearing Carlisle's thoughts to my response, I became appalled by my outburst.

"Carlisle, I'm-I didn't – mean to…" My words trailed off without giving me a chance to finish my sentence.

I was so lost in my thoughts and guilt I hadn't noticed that Carlisle had moved to stand next to me until I felt his steady hand resting on my shoulder.

"There is nothing you need to apologize for. You have been through a lot as well."

Although he said there was nothing I needed to apologize for, I couldn't help but think how wrong he was. I was guilty of so many things.

I was guilty of not just hurting Bella but breaking her as well. Then there was the pain and agony I had put my family through, especially Carlisle and Esme. I had ask for their forgiveness after I disappeared on them once before only to do it again. Shutting myself down to Carlisle's mind, I allowed my thoughts to wander. Carlisle's voice broke through my flashbacks.

"Edward, are you listening, son? Even though Bella is in a deep sleep, her vitals are stable. She'll wake up when her body is ready. You have to trust in that as well as her love for you."

I had no doubt in how much Bella loved me. I just didn't know why. No matter how I looked at it, I could find no sound reason for why she loved a creature like me.

As I sat forward in the chair next to the Bella's bed, I folded my hands under my chin and braced my elbows on my legs. I then caught a glimpse of Alice's thoughts.

"Go away, Alice." I spoke in a whispery voice without removing my eyes from Bella.

"Edward, you should eat," Alice replied softly.

"I will later, Alice." She was aware that it was an empty promise.

"You said that two days ago, Edward. Carlisle said that Bella will wake up when her body is ready. It's using this time to heal." Her tone was filled with annoyance.

"I know that." There was no hiding the irritation that coated my words.

Alice, being Alice, didn't stop there.

"Then get up and go hunting - you need the blood," she replied back to me in a firm voice.

I decisively set my jaw in place and remained where I was seated.

Jasper appeared behind Alice as she walked out of the room. I heard Jasper question her.

"What are you up to, Alice? I've never felt so many things pouring off you at once."

Once the two of them moved down the stairwell, I didn't care to hear what they were saying but Alice giggled.

I remained seated at my vigil at Bella's bedside. The outside world held no interest to me as long as Bella lay here. A few seconds later, I heard Alice's thoughts in my head.

'_Edward, if you don't come down here right now and hunt, I'll total your Volvo.'_

She was bluffing, she had to be. I also knew that Alice was trying to push my buttons. So I spoke in a voice that I knew Alice would hear outside as well.

"No, you won't. It's not in your nature to hurt a car on purpose."

The door to my Volvo clicked open and closed, the sound of the engine revving made me get up and go to the window. I slid it open and glared towards the garage.

"Alice."

The sound of her bell-like voice danced in my head as I read her next thought.

'_You're right it's not in me. I could, however, trade it in for a stylish yellow Porsche.'_

"You wouldn't," was my daring reply.

Alice backed my car out of the garage, and looked up towards my bedroom window. She just smiled at me as I continued to glare at her.

"Try me, Edward," came Alice's challenging reply.

She was serious. Alice was really going to drive off and trade in my car for a Porsche. The thought of leaving Bella, for even a second, caused panic to build up inside of me. I was then reminded that Bella would not be alone. Esme was here, and Carlisle as well. Sparing Bella one more glance, I sped from the room.

Alice was already aware of my choice and she was expecting me to stop her. So I planted myself a few inches in front of the car making Alice bring the car to an abrupt stop.

"Get out of my car, Alice."

"No," was her smug remark. _'Yesterday you didn't care if I totaled your car. You told me you'd just buy a new one. What's so different about today?'_

She seemed to be giving my actions a lot of thought and then the answer came to her.

"Carlisle said no to you buying a new one, didn't he?"

I narrowed my onyx eyes at her.

"Either get out, Alice, or put it back," I replied through gritted teeth.

As I turned around to leave, my decision seemed to make Alice see red, causing her get out of the car with speed that almost mirrored my own, in order to stand in my way.

'_How can someone your age be so dumb?'_

The anger that was in her head was soon pouring from her mouth.

"That's it, Edward, I can't take it any more! You're moping around is not helping any of us. Bella is here and she's alive, so could you at least _pretend_ to be alive too. She's going to wake up, Edward; you just have to give her a chance to. Your hovering isn't going to make her wake up any faster."

At Alice's last statement I looked away from her. Alice then reached out to put a hand on my shoulder; I made no move to flinch out of her touch. Why? Because I knew she was right. My constant hovering wasn't going to bring Bella back to me. No matter how hard I tried to fight it, _fear_ continued to hold me captive.

"Edward, please if you won't go hunting for us, will you do it for Bella? You wouldn't want her to see you like this?"

At Alice's last question, I took a moment to see myself as Alice saw me. I first noticed the dark purple circles under my eyes, which only made the darkness of my eyes more pronounced. How many weeks had it been since I fed last? I couldn't recall. I was still wearing the same shirt that Alice had laid out for me the day that I had returned home.

My voice seemed gone at first and then I managed to find it at last.

"No. I don't want her to see me like this."

As if on cue, Emmett, Rosalie and Jazz appeared beside me. Jazz had assumed the role of mediator, due to the fact that he was influencing my mood.

"Come on, Edward, Alice is right. Come hunting with the three of us. Bella couldn't be in better hands than Carlisle's."

I folded at last, and gave in to Alice and the rest of my family.

"All right, I'll go hunting, even though you're cheating, Jasper." I grated as I tried not to smile.

"My deepest apologies, Edward, but it's for your own good."

I wanted to argue with him and say that staying with Bella was for my own good. But at this point, I was at Jasper's mercy. Emmett suddenly shoved his shoulder into mine, irritation started to build within me towards him. Jasper sensed the slight change in my mood, and I soon found myself bumping Emmett back in return.

A laugh escaped me as he tried the action again. Before long we were all laughing as if Emmett had said something stupid even though I wanted to brood and feel guilty. Every time I did, Jasper would wash it away with a wave of joy.

'_Come on, Edward, stop being so difficult. You agreed to come hunting with us, so why won't you let go for awhile?'_

"Why should I?"

'_You're not the only one here that feels guilty over what happened that night. Not to mention, what it led to in the end.'_

I understood Jasper's guilt, but what did Emmett and Rosalie have to be guilty about? My expression of anger and confusion didn't go unmissed by Jasper.

'_Edward, why are you confused about Emmett and Rosalie feeling guilty? Where is this anger coming from? Emmett, feels like it was his fault just as you feel it's yours. He feels like he acted to late.'_

'_As for Rosalie, she feels like she should have tried to be Bella's friend. Those are the things they feel guilty over. Then again if you've read their thoughts, you'd already know that.'_

As much as a part of me hated to admit it, Jasper was right. If I had taken the time to pay their thoughts any mind, I would have seen their guilt as well. As I scanned their minds, there was one thing in their thoughts that haunted me: the sound Bella's body made as it was lifted off the bed with each charge.

The sound of her heart beat echoed inside of my head. The rhythmic sound of it made me want to turn and run home to my Sleeping Beauty.

"Edward?"

The sound of Jasper's voice brought me back to my senses. When I looked around I realized that Emmett and Rosalie were no longer with us. Emmett had sensed a herd of deer. I could hear their rapidly beating hearts off in the distance. There however was only one beating heart that was calling to me, _Bella's_.

'_Edward, Edward! You promised you'd hunt. Don't go make me do something rash.'_

I didn't care what Jasper did to me. Nor, did the images of myself with dark purple circles under my eyes, eyes that were black from hunger, bother me any longer.

Jasper then spoke out into the forest, "Emmett, time for plans B and C."

Plan B I quickly learned was to assault me with the memory that had shattered not just my heart, but the heart of my love as well as my family's.

_Bella rolled her eyes at us, as she slid her finger under the paper. She then jumped slightly, "Ouch, paper cut."_

_One drop of blood rolled out of the cut and dropped to the floor. The second Bella's sweet scent had filled the air; I threw myself in front of Bella._

"_No!"_

_In my effort to protect Bella, I knocked her backwards. Flowers, cake, presents and plates scattered in her wake. The sound of Jasper slamming into me was like two large boulders crashing into one another during a rock slide._

_Snarling and snapping inches from my face, Jasper tried to shove past me. Even Emmett and Carlisle together struggled to hold him back. There was no sanity in his eyes as he zeroed in on Bella. His eyes were dark with wanting. He hadn't fed in a few days, and with Bella's intoxicating blood exposed, the bloodlust became too much. The calm and gentle Jasper my family had come to know had just given into the monster that dwelt deep within us all._

Just the thought of how sweet her blood was made the monster within me pull at its chains. But I knew he was well-restrained – Bella's love was slowly taming it. It was Bella's love that called to me now, not her blood.

"That was unfair, Jasper; I need no reminders of that night."

'_Don't you, Edward? You've seen what you look like. Stop torturing yourself as well as your family. Bella is angry but she doesn't hate us.'_

My steps faltered as Jasper continued to speak to me through his thoughts. I knew he was right, but how did one remove self hated for one's own self?

'_Two deer, Edward, that's all we're asking. Emmett will do the hunting if you would like.' _

Jasper caught hold of my confusion again.

'_What has you so confused, Edward? Talk to me.'_

"How do you rid yourself of your self-hate?"

'_You do what you can to remind yourself that you are what you are, or you find another outlet.'_

Another outlet? Then it clicked inside my head, that was plan C. "No, Jasper, I won't do it."

We both knew, however, that Jasper could make me do what he wanted just by tweaking my emotions.

'_There is a small part of you that is angry with me and you know it.'_

"No, you're wrong," I said through gritted teeth.

My jaw clinched as Jasper continued to push and pull at the anger I had buried; before throwing a little bloodlust at me.

"Jas-per…"

The chain that had me tethered to sanity snapped. I lunged at Jasper, causing the two of us to slam into a tree. Bark snapped and the old tree groaned under our weight. It took me a full minute to get a hold of myself.

"Damn it, Jazz!"

The anger was easier to shake off than the bloodlust. With my senses heightened, I heard them, barely a mile away to the east of the woods. Four hearts pounded wildly as a fifth thumping heart chased after them. I sped off toward the sounds. As I raced off, I caught Jasper's questioning voice in my head.

'_Edward?'_

The sound of Emmett and Rosalie questions barely registered in my ears.

"Where the hell did Edward go? I thought the two of you were fighting?"

Jasper's voice soon followed.

"No not really, I was just influencing him a bit. Then he heard a herd of deer. "

"Well damn, and here I brought him back dinner," Emmett said in a playful tone.

I let their voices fade as I let the bloodlust Jasper had brought to the surface take over. My prey was merely inches away from me. Breaking into a small clearing the deer scattered as I went straight between them. The mountain lion that was hot on their trail skidded on the forest floor as it tried to avoid me.

It failed and my marble arms wrapped themselves around its body. Its soft fur brushed against my marble skin as I tightened my grip. It screamed and struggled to escape from my grasp which only caused me to tighten my arms around him, compressing his lungs until he could no longer breathe.

Once the lion gave up on fighting back, the beast within me took over as I bit into its jugular vein. There was nothing in this world that could compare to the sweetness of Bella's blood. Today however, the lion was cutting it pretty close. How long had it been since I last fed?

_Six days_, it seemed impossible that I would be so starved in such a short time. I had fed only twice since learning Bella's whereabouts: once on my way back to Forks, the second time was when I was getting ready to leave Forks in search of Bella; only to have Laurent stop me.

I dropped the lion in my arms just as the last drop of its blood fell against my lips. I was sated but not full. So I set out to find another herd of deer. I was finishing up my third deer; when suddenly, I felt a strong pull to return to the house immediately.

When I returned to the house I was greeted by joy-filled thoughts of Bella. Slipping up the stairs and into my room, glancing down at my bed I saw the change of clothes Alice had laid out for me. While I was changing, I heard Alice talking excitedly to Bella.

"I'm so happy to see you awake. As for Edward, he's fine, Bella. He hasn't left your side since you went to sleep. I had to get a little dirty today to get him to go hunting."

I used this moment to make my presence known to my sister.

"You mean you had Jasper get dirty for you."

Alice's face and thoughts gave away her surprise.

'_What Edward, what are you doing back already?'_

She then quickly took the spotlight off of herself and moved on to me.

"So, Edward, how was your hunt?" she asked me.

She knew the answer. My eyes were bright gold in color and the dark bruises under them were gone. I had stuffed myself in a similar fashion Jazz had.

There was an awkward silence and I could feel the shameful guilt that hung in the air. Alice wasn't completely forgiven and neither was I. Staying off to the side in the shadows, a smile came to my lips as I watched the interaction between Carlisle and Bella.

"Carlisle, would it be okay for me to have some water and some crackers? You know to start me out on?"

Carlisle smiled at Bella before speaking.

"I take it that you're feeling hunger, then?"

"Is that a bad thing?"

Carlisle chuckled.

"No, not at all Bella, it's a very good sign."

Bella, then looked to her left at Alice and me.

"Um, I need a human moment."

I came out of the shadows and moved to lift Bella from the bed only to be stopped.

"Would it be okay if Alice did it?"

I felt as if I had been slapped at Bella's request. I couldn't bring myself to be mad at her; I had brought this on myself.

"Of course, Bella love." I said while keeping my true feelings hidden from her.

I remain in the bedroom, carefully but discreetly listening in on what they where talking about in the bathroom.

"Alice, how's Jasper doing?" Bella asked.

"He's fine, but wouldn't you rather hear it from him?" Alice questioned in return.

Bella reply was soft, "You're right."

Alice then asked her next question, "All done?"

"Alice, would you buy me a couple of new outfits?" Bella spoke slowly has if the words tasted bad.

Hearing Alice squeal, "Do you really mean it, Bella?"

I quickly did my best to turn my attention else where. There was however no way for me to not hear what Bella was saying.

"Well, I'm going to need a few things if I'm going to be staying here. The four sets of clothes I brought with me won't last long."

She was here to stay and the shopping trip for Alice meant that she was at least ready to forgive my sister. What Bella asked next almost had me falling out of my seat on the bed in disbelief.

"I can stay here, can't I? You're not going to send me away?"

Knowing what Alice was going to say, I said it before her.

"No one here is going to send you away, love."

Hearing the two of them moving themselves around in the bathroom, I planted myself right outside the door as it opened.

"May I, Bella?" I asked hope coated each word.

Bella just nodded at me. Alice gently handed her over.

I slipped my arms gently under her arms holding them outward as I did so. Alice smiled as she noticed that I was now wearing the smoke colored long-sleeved thermal shirt she had laid out earlier under my light grey t-shirt. Bella tentatively placed her hands on my marble like arms.

"You're not exactly warm, but you're not cold either. Just comfortable," Bella's voice whispered.

'_See Edward, isn't it a good thing you put it on.' _Alice asked me.

"Yes, Alice, thank you," was my only reply.

She looked at me and winked before giving Bella her attention.

"Well, Bella, if you don't need me I think I have some shopping to do."

I watched as Alice placed a kiss on Bella's cheek, before disappearing out the door. After which Alice's thoughts were consumed by thought of clothes and Jasper. Turning my focus on Bella, I smiled at her as I spoke.

"You made it to the doorway, love. I think that's enough for the first day."

Slightly out of breath, Bella replied, "Sounds good to me."

Lifting her lovingly into my arms I carried Bella the rest of the way to the bed. Laying her gently in the bed, I then brought the blanket up to cover her.

"You're not going to tell me to get some sleep are you?" she questioned.

I chuckled softly at this, "No, love, I'm definitely not."

"Good," was her subtle reply.

"I thought maybe we could read for a little while. I have one of your favorites."

I handed Bella the hardcover 2nd edition of Wuthering Heights I had purchased. Her eyes widened at the sight of it. I smiled as she dove into the book with such vigor one wouldn't have known that Bella was injured.

Just as I was about to sit down with my own book, the organized thoughts that made up Alice's mind became chaos.

Alice was having a vision. The images I saw caused me to suck in a quick breath. The Volturi were looking for me. I had broken one of their rules by allowing Bella to know what I was. Somehow, the Volturi had found out about my little coup.

Seconds later, images of a dozen or more newborns flashed inside my head. As I tried to sort out the chaos of images from Alice's mind, I could hear Bella's soft voice calling out to me.

"Ed-ward, what is it? Edward what's wrong?"

As my mind worked on processing Alice's vision, three faces I had seen in her vision seemed to be mocking me.

"No, it can't be. Not them, no, not them..."

_Please God, don't let it come to be._

**A/N: Wow- go me! This chapter was longer then the last chapter. Ch. 10 is 4,372 words.**

**Ok so I've working on my video for Lunar Eclipse, but I'm just not sure I have the right song. If you know of a song that would fit Lunar Eclipse perfectly let me know.**

**Thanks for reading and don't be shy leave a review.**

**Playlist fun facts: Bring me to Life by Evanescence, and Meet Me on the Equinox by Death Cab for Cutie were the songs I was listening to while writing this chapter.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	11. Absolution Now

**Disclaimer:**** I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time:**_

_**Carlisle POV**_

_"Is Bella going to be all right?"_

_My amber eyes locked with Jasper's bright topaz ones. A deep sigh escaped from within me when I answered him._

_"She is for now, though I can not safely say for how long. Bella has been through so much. The emotional wounds that Edward must have caused, coupled with the trauma her body has been through the last months as well as the accident she was in today. Unless she finds the will within her, it's not promising."_

_Jasper voiced another question. I however knew where he was going and didn't let him finish._

_"If the outcome looks that bleak then why not…"_

_"Because that is not what Edward wants for her," I answered in a resolute tone._

_I relaxed a little as I felt Jasper's hand gently touched the top of my right shoulder._

_"Carlisle, though Rosalie may be resentful for your choice to change her, know she holds no ill will toward you any more. Alice and I didn't choose this existence and neither did you. Who are we to tell Bella no when she is choosing it? Alice said she has never been so sure of a vision as the one she saw of Bella becoming one of us."_

_I shook my head as I pinched the bridge of my nose between my fingers. I couldn't make this decision for Bella. I had done that to Edward already. I needed to be sure if this was still what Bella wanted. Then there was Edward to consider. I was afraid of his reaction if I did this without his approval._

_"I can not make that decision in good faith, knowing that Edward would despise me the rest of eternity."_

**Chapter 11: Absolution Now **

**Jasper POV**

_"Or maybe he would thank you - Carlisle, look at the alternative..."_

Those had been my words a few days ago, right before we lost Bella. Only to have her returned to Edward by some strange miracle. That crisis had been averted, but now there was this alarming cryptic vision. Alice swears part of the vision was still unclear meaning there was a chance it wouldn't come to pass.

I could tell by her emotions, Alice was hiding something from me. I suspected it had to do with the second part of her vision - the unknown yet familiar faces. More pressing however was what to do about the Volturi who were looking for not only Edward, but Bella as well. Shortly after her vision, Alice got into Carlisle's car and went shopping. She came home with more than clothes and shoes for Bella. The whole back seat was stacked with wrapped boxes. I gingerly make my way down the stairs to help with Alice's bounty from her shopping spree.

"Alice, _darlin, _what's going on with all the boxes?"

"They're Christmas presents, silly, after all tomorrow is the 23rd. With Christmas Eve and Christmas so close, I decided this year to go to the store and shop without thinking about what I wanted to get until I got there. This way Edward has no idea what I got everyone."

"Alice."

Before I could say anything else, Alice was shoving bags and boxes into my arms.

"Here, Jazzy, would you run these upstairs to our room for me? I have a few things I still have to wrap and I need to go talk with Esme about a few things."

My wife was stalling, she always had me doing some kind of errand when she wasn't ready to share. The only thing I had been able to get from my wife was that something even more terrifying was about to befall our family. I knew her she would come to me to talk soon. So with a sigh I headed up the stairs with the boxes and bags.

Closing the door behind me after finishing the favor Alice had asked of me, I heard Bella call out to me from down the hall.

"Jasper, is that you?"

I very slowly poked my head into the doorway.

"Yes, Bella what can I do for ya?"

She seemed anxious about something. The key was right there in her eyes as well as the emotions pouring from her: Edward hadn't shared a thing with her.

"Talk to me, Jasper, tell me something, anything. No one will talk to me and I can't stand it. Alice's vision meant something; I know it did because Edward won't talk to me."

I sent a small amount of calm toward Bella.

"Jasper, stop it with the mood control thing. I don't want to be calm, I want to be treated like someone who is visible, not someone who's not!"

"If I wanted that I would have stayed dead. Edward's treating my like I'm glass or something."

At the end of Bella's last two statements, I felt a wave of guilt and hurt come from different places in the house. Everyone had heard Bella's words. She then patted the spot next to her on the bed indicating she wanted me to sit with her.

"Bella, I don't think I should."

She frowned at me.

"Oh come on, Jasper, you fed earlier today. I can tell from how gold your eyes are."

There was no denying Bella had me there, because I had. Just because Alice and Bella seemed to trust me didn't mean I could trust myself. There was no fear of me in her eyes, as she calmly waited for me to decide. Watching Bella's reaction, I made my way over to the bed to sit down. Bella was always so giving, never thinking once about herself. The least I could do was give back to her.

'_She deserves to know a little about what's happening, Edward.'_

A low hiss from downstairs in Carlisle's office was my only answer from Edward.

"It seems the Volturi have found out about you and Edward. As Edward has told you, there is nothing for you to worry about."

Bella seemed deep in thought for a while before she nodded her head. She then focused her attention back on me.

"I don't blame you, you know, for what happened the night of my birthday. I blamed myself for being careless. I never blamed any of you for being what you are."

I did my best to give Bella a small smile. "Thank you, Bella that means a lot coming from you, though I am still rather ashamed by my actions."

"Guess that answers the question I asked Alice earlier."

I raised an eyebrow at hearing this as I looked at Bella.

"Really and what was that?"

Bella picked at the threads in the blanket cover her as she spoke.

"I just asked Alice how you were doing. That night when Edward took me home, he said you were beside yourself. I was hoping you were doing better now."

I gave her words some thought before I answered them. It warmed me to hear and feel Bella's concern for me.

"It wasn't easy and I won't say that it is effortless to be around you. But it is easier than it was three months ago. I am impressed and slightly jealous of the control Edward has over it. Although he is more practiced than me. To see and feel what it is like for him makes me have the deepest respect for him, for all of my family."

Even as I found myself saying that to Bella, my mind drifted to the day after Bella's birthday party.

_Everyone's faces were solemn; Rosalie who had just released her dislike of Edward's decision to leave got up and left the room in a blur. Seconds later, her door slammed closed. Alice, however, continued to plead with Edward._

"_Edward, please, this is so unfair. It will kill Bella if we leave."_

"_Bella's human, she'll forget about us soon enough. She'll be safer if I'm not around."_

_At hearing Edward's last statement something within me snapped. _

"_You mean safe from us, more importantly safe from me! After, all I'm the one who is at fault here."_

_I had done my best to take the blame off of Edward's shoulders and place it on my own. He, however, wouldn't have it._

"_No, I'm the one at fault. I knew how dangerous it was to have Bella around us being what we are and I took the risk the second I gave into the feelings I had for her."_

_At the word 'had', I was torn by the pain that fabricated word carried with it, allowing me to see the truth inside the lie._

"Jasper, are you all right?"

At the sound of Bella's worried-filled question, I blinked and smiled lightly at her.

"I'm fine, Bella."

I took note of how anxious Bella was. It wasn't difficult to know the source of that concern - the Volturi were very much a reason to be concerned.

"Don't worry Bella; there are ways to keep them from finding us. Edward isn't in any danger right now and neither are you."

Glancing at the clock I saw it was getting late, I was certain of it when Bella stifled a yawn.

"Get some more rest, Bella. Edward is talking to Carlisle about removing some of your stitches tomorrow. I need to speak to Edward for a moment and then I promise to return him to you."

Bella chuckled at my teasing tone as she spoke.

"What choice would I have any way?"

I smiled at her and excused myself from her room.

As I headed out of the front door, I allowed one of my thoughts to ring clear toward Edward.

'_Edward, can we talk?'_

It was a simple request and Edward was free to say no. He, however, granted my request, appearing outside on the porch in less than a second.

"You had no right to tell her about the Volturi looking for me." Edward fumed.

"You can't keep her in the dark for long. Bella's very perceptive, she would have figured it out soon enough."

Edward pinched the bridge of his nose as he turned away from me.

He sounded downtrodden when he spoke again, "I know she is. I also know that she would be willing to give up her humanity if she knew it would mean we would no longer be in danger from the Volturi."

I was aware what he was saying was true, but it didn't mean I agreed with his decision not to tell her.

"Alice is doing her best to stay one step ahead of them."

Before I could say anything more aloud, Edward was answering my thoughts.

'_I've heard of them and seen the aftermath of what happened to the vampires who were involved in the wars of the south. I however have never come face to face with any of them. Have you, Edward?"_

"No, I haven't. Carlisle is the only one who as spent time with them."

'_Then it is safe to say their tracker will be looking for Carlisle then? I would say we should split up, however, there is safety in numbers.'_

"I agree with you."

The two of us grew quite. I found myself musing over the events of earlier today. It wasn't one of my smarter plans, but it did give me what I wanted from Edward.

I knew that it would be kinder for me to talk with Edward directly on? How he had been behaving instead of attacking the emotions he had sealed away. However, when Bella was involved, Edward tended not to be capable of listening to reason or of seeing it.

So I worked out a strategy that Edward had no way around. Especially with me keeping some of my thoughts shielded from him. I should have known how he would respond after setting such _poisonous _emotions free.

I owed Edward one hell of an apology.

"I am sorry about earlier. It wasn't right of me to do that to you. I would ask for forgiveness for my actions, however, I don't really regret them. You are just so stubborn and set in your ways. Hearing our thoughts doesn't mean you understand them you know."

I waited for him to comment on what I had just said, but he didn't say anything. So I took this as a sign for me to continue.

"Do you realize how broken you were when we left Forks? Carlisle and Esme were at a loss as to what to do for you. Then you just up and left, none of us thought we would ever see you again. You were so lost, Edward, that none of us knew how to help you. Save from going and bringing Bella to you."

'_Wait one more second, I'm not finished.'_

"We all understand why you felt leaving would be the best course of action. But we also knew it was the wrong strategy and should have discussed your decision more. Our cowardice kept us from taking action. We all were afraid to tell you no."

In one quick action, Edward ran a hand through his unruly hair.

"I didn't really think my plan was going to work. But she believed me so fully, it took me by surprise. I had expected her to fight me on it. I had no idea she had doubts about how I felt about her."

I was soon assaulted by such deep remorse that I nearly felt to my knees from it. Edward's ocher eyes met my own. He was pleading with me for the second time today.

"I've almost lost her twice now, I can't lose her, Jazz. I won't survive if I do. I just wish I knew what it was that Victoria - and now the Volturi - were planning. We need a plan of our own if we are going to be ready for them "

I clasped my hand on Edward's shoulder and sent him a wave of reassurance.

"Everything will be fine, Edward. We won't let anything happen to Bella. She is, after all, family."

Something then occurred to me - Edward wasn't as giddy as I expected him to be. Despite the current situation, we all had been anticipating for it to happen as soon as Bella awoke.

"Have you not asked Bella yet?"

"It's not the right time," he whispered.

His words had me questioning him again.

"When would it be the right time?" I asked.

Instead of answering me, Edward remained silent.

'_Edward?'_

"I'm not sure but I know it's too soon. Alice may be forgiven; I however doubt she is ready to forgive me yet."

Edward might not be sure of when was the right time, but I knew however his feelings for Bella weren't going to change. Time was no longer our ally - it was our enemy.

_To be given Absolution is to be unleashed from the heavy chain that binds you. _

**A/N: Another chapter down, only a handful or so to go.**

**Playlist fact: Muse was the music I used for this chapter Sing For Absolution, Ruled By Secrecy, Hysteria and Stockholm Syndrome.**

**I hope everyone liked this chapter a little bit better than the last. I will do my best not to repeat myself too much more. We are reaching the point where more things will be revealed and there will be a little more action coming into play. Thanks for picking Lunar Eclipse to read and review.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	12. Home

**Disclaimer:**** I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

**A/N: For this chapter seeing that nothing is really said about the date of birth for each of the Cullen's is unknown except for Edward who's is June 20, 1901 (Pearl) the others will be as follows:**

**Carlisle: September (Sapphire), Esme: April (Diamond) Rosalie: January (Garnet), Emmett: May (Emerald), Jasper: February (Amethyst), Alice: November (Citrine) **

**A big loving thank you to my wonderful beta TwiliteAddict without you this chapter would have never been realized. I would like to also give a HUGE thank you to Lady Tazz for helping me with Jasper's, Alice's and Emmett's gifts.**

_**Last Time: Jasper POV**_

_**Shortly after her vision, Alice got into Carlisle's car and went shopping. She came home with more than clothes and shoes for Bella. The whole back seat was stacked with wrapped boxes. I gingerly make my way down the stairs to help with Alice's bounty from her shopping spree.**_

_**"Alice, **__**darlin, **__**what's going on with all the boxes?"**_

_**"They're Christmas presents, silly, after all tomorrow is the 23rd. With Christmas Eve and Christmas so close, I decided this year to go to the store and shop without thinking about what I wanted to get until I got there. This way Edward has no idea what I got everyone."**_

_**"Alice."**_

_**Before I could say anything else, Alice was shoving bags and boxes into my arms.**_

_**"Here, Jazzy, would you run these upstairs to our room for me? I have a few things I still have to wrap and I need to go talk with Esme about a few things."**_

_**My wife was stalling, she always had me doing some kind of errand when she wasn't ready to share. The only thing I had been able to get from my wife was that something even more terrifying was about to befall our family. I knew her she would come to me to talk soon. So with a sigh I headed up the stairs with the boxes and bags.**_

**Chapter 12: Home**

**Alice POV**

There was no holding back the smile on my face as I helped Bella get dressed for the morning. I helped her put a light blue t-shirt and paired it with a blue and black-grey flannel shirt. Bella had actually gasped in surprise at my choice of clothes for her.

"Oh my gosh, Alice. You actually got me a flannel shirt. I'm impressed."

I gave Bella a small pout. "Really, Bella, I'm hurt that you would say such a thing. Of course I would pick you out three or four flannel shirts along with coordinating t-shirts.

They are after all your comfort clothes not to mention your favorite thing to wear in the winter."

"You're right, they are. I just never thought you would let me actually wear them!"

I pouted a little at hearing Bella's words but stayed quite.

Wanting to talk about more then just clothes for once, I started with something I was hoping that Bella would talk to me about so I could gauge her mood better.

"Carlisle's going to remove your stitches today, so are you excited?"

I watched as Bella shrugged her shoulders.

"They're just stitches, Alice." She sighed before finishing, "I just wish it wasn't going to leave a scar."

I grinned at Bella before answering her.

"You're so silly, Bella. Did you forget it was Carlisle who stitched up that head of yours? There won't be much of a scar at all. No one but one of us will be able to see it."

Tapping the side of my head I grinned at Bella. "I can see the future, remember?"

Bella laughed lightly at me.

"You can only see decisions that someone makes, remember?"

Doing my best not to giggle out loud, I nodded at Bella.

"Yes, I know that, Bella. How do you think I know that there won't be much of a scar? Carlisle is very good at what he does after all. So really, Bella, there won't be much of a scar I can promise you."

I started brushing out Bella's hair when Carlisle appeared in the doorway of Edward's, and now Bella's, room.

"Good morning Alice, Bella. Bella, how are you feeling this morning?" He asked in a gentle tone.

Bella smiled softly at Carlisle as she answered him.

"I feel pretty good today. I'm a little sore, but the pain isn't nearly as bad as it has been."

Carlisle smiled softly back at Bella in return.

"That's very good to hear, and if you were in pain, would you let one of us know?"

Bella nodded her head. Her eyes drifted down to the suture scissors Carlisle had in his left hand. Pulling in a deep breath, she added, "I'm ready when you are, Dr. Cullen."

Brushing Bella's hair away from her forehead, he revealed the side of Bella's forehead where a large gash had been. Then with nimble fingers Carlisle started to cut the stitches and gently remove them. As Carlisle worked he started a light conversation with Bella.

"Edward was more than willing to remove your stitches today. However, he thought it would be better if he went hunting one last time, just in case. Jasper, Esme and Emmett agreed with him. On their way back Esme thought she and Edward could pick up a few things up at the store for you."

Bella gave Carlisle a confused look before everything started to make sense to her.

"Oh, you mean just in case Victoria or the Volturi come looking for me."

Carlisle and I both frowned at Bella's words. Carlisle spoke to Bella first.

"Well, no, that was not the original reason all of us decided to go hunting again. There is a snow storm in the forecast for the next two days. Edward thought it would be best if we went hunting before the storm that way there would be no worry of leaving you alone."

Putting down the scissors, Carlisle smiled at Bella before adding, "There you go, and the scar is so faint no one will see it."

There was a faint pucker of scar tissue were the cut had been. Though the tiny scar was there, the skin over it was as smooth as it had been before.

Carlisle then tilted Bella's chin up so Bella was looking up at him.

"And, Bella, please remember that you're part of this family now. My son is alive because you exist. Never doubt how much you mean to us."

After Carlisle excused himself I took a seat on Bella's bed.

"Carlisle's right, Bella. Besides if Victoria or the Volturi were coming, I would have seen them decide. It's Christmas Eve so could you at least try and enjoy yourself?"

My words managed to coax a laugh out of Bella.

"All right, Alice, I'll do my best to enjoy myself."

I leaned over and kissed Bella on the cheek.

"Thank you, Bella, you won't regret it."

Bella then frowned at me.

"Alice, I can't afford to buy anyone anything this Christmas."

I chuckled lightly at her statement.

"Relax, Bella, while I was out earlier I picked up gifts from you to everyone. I even picked out something for Renee, Charlie and Jacob."

Taking hold of Bella's hand, I helped her off of the bed. I let Bella lean on me as I led the way up to mine and Jasper's room. Once I helped Bella sit down on the bed, I busied myself laying out the gifts I purchased for her to pick from. When it came to a gift for Rosalie and Esme I knew Bella would want to pick it out herself.

After looking at the several different choices Bella chose a dark purple rose ring and earring set for Rosalie. She told me it was because they reminded her of Rosalie. For Esme, she picked out a 24k gold heart pendant that had a diamond in its center. Around the left side going down were gemstones for each one of us starting with a pearl for Edward, a garnet gem for Rosalie, an emerald gem for Emmett, an amethyst gem for Jasper, a citrine gem for me, and the last stone, a sapphire gem for Bella. I couldn't have agreed more with Bella's choice.

Bella said she'd chosen it so Esme would always have us close to her heart.

Bella had decided for Edward she wanted to search the internet for sheet music for Edward to play on his piano. She was so excited at the thought that I couldn't bear to tell her Edward already had a ton of sheet music. Eventually, she chose three works from Claude Debussy: Valse romantique and his famous Nocturnes, and Clair de lune. I teased Edward often on how Clair de lune was fast becoming their song.

Bella then looked up at me like she wanted to say something. Knowing what she was going to say before she spoke, I just smiled at her.

"Of course, Bella, why didn't you say something sooner?"

Setting up the laptop for her, I excused myself from the room so Bella could look for something extra special for Edward.

Two hours later, Esme, Emmett, and Jasper came home without Edward. His absence went unmissed by Bella, but she continued to search the internet for Edward's gift before falling asleep. Edward came through the door an hour and a half later with a little blue bag in his hand.

Edward slipped up the stairs to hide the special gift he had picked up for Bella before slipping into Jasper's and my room to retrieve Bella's sleeping form. Once he had her cradled into his arms he gently carried her to their room to lay her in the bed.

I smiled to myself as I had a vision of what he did after he pulled the blanket around her. Edward placed a kiss on her forehead before moving and placing his lips gently against hers.

All things considered I thought Christmas morning went rather well. Rosalie remembered her manners and thanked Bella for the rose ring and earring set. Esme was over-joyed with the heart pendent with a precious gem for each one of her adopted children. Carlisle was honored and touched by the sterling silver stethoscope cuff links Bella had chosen for him, with a blue sapphire stone in the center of each stethoscope.

Once all the paper and bows were cleaned up, Edward sat down at his piano and started to play Green Sleeves, followed by a little Chopin, Bach, and the sheet music Bella had gotten him for Christmas. Emmett was careful not to hug Bella too hard in his joy over his gift of an Xbox game of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Jasper gave her a polite thank you with a small smile at the leather bound book that she had found to give to Jazz. The book was titled: **The Grand Design: Strategy and the U.S. Civil War. **

When it came to finding a gift for me, it was easy. One word: Prada.

Bella scolded us for making to much for her to eat for breakfast. Even though Bella was almost completely healed physically, we all were wondering how she was doing emotionally.

After an hour of watching Edward stare at Bella and she at him, it became clear to all of us they could use some alone time. So my family and I left. I knew that this was going to be good for the both of them. They both needed to heal one another.

**Bella POV**

I didn't know what to expect for my first Christmas with Edward's family. I was grateful that my clumsiness hadn't gotten me in trouble so far. The last thing I needed was a repeat of my birthday. Once all the excitement of gifts and presenting me an oversized meal was over, happy couples began leaving the room. Before long, only Edward and I remained.

Suddenly, Edward had a blindfold over my eyes before scooping me up into his arms and heading off to another room in the house.

"Edward, what's going on? Where are we going?"

I could hear the smile in his voice when he spoke.

"You'll see in just a second."

I didn't my best not to let my nerves get the better of me before the blindfold was thankfully whisked from my eyes.

A smaller tree than the one that was in the living room, twinkled in the dim light in front of me. It was modest and decorated very simply. It was still beautiful to behold.

"Edward, this is beautiful, but why are there two trees? I didn't see anything wrong with the tree in the living room."

Edward gave me one of his lop-sided smiles that melted my insides as he spoke.

"You're right, the other tree is fine. There are two trees, love, because the one in the living room is the family's tree, while this tree is ours."

I brought my eyes up to meet with his liquid gold ones.

"Our tree, are you serious, really?"

He smiled at me again.

"Yes. I thought it would only be right for the two of us to have our own Christmas morning together."

_Our own Christmas morning. _I had never really thought about it. My thoughts soon drifted to the other gift I had gotten for him in secret. Well, I was sure that Alice knew about it. I could only hope that her thoughts were guarded enough so Edward wouldn't know about it. I wasn't even sure he was going to like it.

We both ended up trying to speak at the same time.

"Bella, I got…"

"Edward I…"

The action caused a giggle to break free from me and a small chuckle from Edward.

Smiling at him I said, "You go first, Edward."

"Ladies first, Bella, remember?"

I smiled at the memory of the day in biology class when Edward and I were doing slides on flat worms.

"I did go first, this morning with your family. So now it's your turn."

"As you wish, love."

I watched as Edward pulled out a big square black velvet box and gently handed it to me.

"I had been afraid that it was too soon for these, but Carlisle and Esme didn't agree with me."

After hearing Edward's words I really was nervous. The box however was too big to be holding a ring. That thought alone helped me to relax. Gently I started to pull at the ribbon and bow on top. Once the ribbon was gone I smiled tentatively at Edward as I slowly pulled open the box.

Inside were two matching silver and diamond burettes, in the center of each one lay the Cullen Crest.

"Oh, Edward their beautiful, but I'm n…"

Edward stopped me from saying anything else.

"Shhh…you are very much a part of this family, Bella."

There was desire shining within Edward's eyes, but there was still a small sliver of doubt living inside me.

Finding my nerve before it ran away I spoke, "I have something I wanted to give you."

"Bella, the sheet music you gave me was enough. You didn't have to."

"I know I didn't, but I wanted too."

Pulling out the slender blue box from its hiding place tucked inside my knee brace, I handed it to Edward. My cheeks reddened in embarrassment as I did so.

"I'm not even sure that you're going to like it."

Edward gave me another soft smile as he spoke.

"Bella, _I shall love and cherish any and every gift you give to me_ simply because it came from you."

Taking the box gently in his hand, Edward removed the gold ribbon from it before he slowly pulled the box open. I watched in silence as Edward's eyes widened at the sight at what lay inside. A sliver ID bracelet, with a silver and gold chain, on the front was inscribed: Edward, We Are One Forever, on the back there were only two words.

Love, Bella.

"Bella, I'm at a loss of words as to what to say. No one has ever given me anything like this before. Thank you."

For the sixth time today I could only smile at him.

"It's about time you're the one who is speechless."

Edward held the box out toward me, silently asking me to help him but it on. Once the bracelet was clasped onto his right wrist, Edward leaned forward to place the two burettes in place on the left side in my hair.

"They suit you. The lights from the tree along with the burettes only enhance your beauty."

My breath hitched in my throat as Edward leaned toward me. My lips ached to feel his against them again. The second our lips touched the sliver of hurt was swept away by my wanting of him. There was an instant spark before the fire took hold. I had missed this, missed us. Edward's lips seemed to have the same wanting as mine did. The need to breathe was lost as I gave myself to the heated bliss that Edward's lips fed to me.

I eased our kiss enough to take a breath while not breaking it. I had felt passion from Edward like this only twice before. Once when he had given me to Alice and Jasper, as we ran from James. The other time had been a few months ago when he had left me, taking my heart with him. This kiss was fiercer as if he needed it in order to survive. I wanted to move closer to him, but there was no way for me to move him on my own. As if knowing what it was I needed, Edward's body relaxed more and moved backwards. I moved with him until I was straddling his hips. Ours lips never broke their frantic movements. The brace on my knee and ankle were forgotten, the only thing that mattered was the two of us.

I moaned softly as I relished in the feeling of the coolness of Edward's marble skin beneath my warm hand. Edward moaned in answer to my gentle moan. I was hyper aware of how tight the front of his jeans had become. His erection was being held off by the simple fabric of his jeans. It was inches away from my hidden valley that was shielded by its own fabric barrier.

My arousal must have been what gave me away. Edward broke the bond our lips had made so fast that both of us lay there panting for a bit before he spoke.

"We can't, Bella. We can't go any farther then kissing. Not until you're changed."

What? Well I hadn't been expecting him to say that. Was he finally giving into my wish to be like him or was he just biding time? I had a whole speech planned out, but the only thing I said was:

"Okay."

He started to pull away until I objected.

"No, wait, can we just lay this way for awhile? I just want you to hold me."

There was a part of me screaming to remember that he wasn't forgiven yet. Another part was telling the other to shut the hell up. Right now I didn't care if I hadn't forgiven Edward all the way or not. The only thing I cared about was that I was _home_.

I smiled at the feel of Edward's hands combing through my hair. I sighed as I lay against Edward. I was grateful for the fires that they had lit to warm the house. It made lying with Edward like this comfortable.

"Bella, I think Alice is right. It's the holidays, I know you've talked to your mother, but you should call Charlie and let him hear your voice."

I could only guess that me calling Charlie had been the thought that Alice had used to hide my latest gift from Edward.

"He'll just try and talk me into coming home."

Edward continued his gentle treatment of my hair as he spoke.

"And if going home is something you chose to do, then I'll go back to Forks with you, no strings attached. Of course it would mean that Alice and Jasper would be coming too as well as Carlisle and Esme."

"You would move back to Forks with me?"

"If that is what you want, then yes, I would."

"Can I think about it, the calling Charlie part, and the going back to Forks part?"

"Take as much time as you need. Just promise that you will think about it."

"I will. I promise."

Before I knew it I found myself drifting to sleep within Edward's gentle arms. It felt good to be home.

**A/N: Wow, sorry for the late update. Life has been busy for me. I hope you enjoyed!**

**Songs played during the writing of this chapter: Valse romantique by Debussy, Green Sleeves, Clair de lune by Debussy, Because You Live by Jesse McCartney and Breathe Me by Sia.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	13. Trapped

**Disclaimer:**** I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

**A/N: This chapter is dedicated to Lady Tazz. There is a character that will appear in this chapter later that is named after her.**

_**Last Time:**_

_**Bella POV**_

_There was a part of me screaming to remember that he wasn't forgiven yet. Another part was telling the other to shut the hell up. Right now I didn't care if I hadn't forgiven Edward all the way or not. The only thing I cared about was that I was __home__._

_I smiled at the feel of Edward's hands combing through my hair. I sighed as I lay against Edward. I was grateful for the fires that they had lit to warm the house. It made lying with Edward like this comfortable._

_"Bella, I think Alice is right. It's the holidays, I know you've talked to your mother, but you should call Charlie and let him hear your voice."_

_I could only guess that me calling Charlie had been the thought that Alice had used to hide my latest gift from Edward._

_"He'll just try and talk me into coming home."_

_Edward continued his gentle treatment of my hair as he spoke._

_"And if going home is something you chose to do, then I'll go back to Forks with you, no strings attached. Of course it would mean that Alice and Jasper would be coming too as well as Carlisle and Esme."_

_"You would move back to Forks with me?"_

_"If that is what you want, then yes, I would."_

_"Can I think about it, the calling Charlie part, and the going back to Forks part?"_

_"Take as much time as you need. Just promise that you will think about it."_

_"I will. I promise."_

_Before I knew it I found myself drifting to sleep within Edward's gentle arms. It felt good to be home._

**Chapter 13: Trapped **

**Bella POV**

I could tell I was starting to wake. But I chose to linger in my dream a little longer. My mind was replaying the events of Christmas day and it was so warm and pleasant, I curled up and let the memories fill my mind.

_Of course, Edward's family showered me with gifts. Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper had gone out and bought me a used sedan and fixed it up. Emmett teased with the keys before giving them to me._

"_Edward told us about what you did to the radio in your truck. So you have to promise that you won't mangle the one in the car."_

_I could help but giggle at Emmett's teasing tone. Holding my left hand over my heart and one in the air, I spoke._

"_I swear never to abuse the radio in my new used car."_

_I seriously doubted that it was a used car until Jasper spoke up._

"_Oh, we made some adjustment to the car's engine."_

_That was code for your car can go faster than in should. Edward's dream of getting me into a faster car had just happened. I couldn't help but wonder what other adjustments they had made to the car._

_Alice had purchased the largest wardrobe of clothes I had ever seen. _

_Carlisle and Esme had given me my own unlimited gold credit card. Giving it to me brought them such joy, there was no way I could say no. _

_Edward gave me a new CD to replace the one that had been ruined in my accident. He had also found the negatives from my birthday and replaced those. Edward had surprised me the most with the gift he gave me later in the evening: t__wo matching silver and diamond burettes, in the center of each one lay the Cullen Crest._

_I smiled recalling the look on Edward's face when I gave him my gift of a silver ID bracelet with a silver and gold chain t engraved with the words We Are One Forever. _

_He seemed shocked and yet very pleased with my gift at the same time._

_"Bella, I'm at a loss of words as to what to say. No one has ever given me anything like this before. Thank you." He said in his velvety voice that melted my insides._

_After I had helped Edward put on his bracelet, he clipped my burettes into place. We had then attempted to move forward a little by sharing a kiss, and then another. After that everything seemed to start to move forward so fast, until Edward pulled our out of our passionate kiss. Deeming it wasn't safe to go any farther then kissing until I had been changed. Not "if" but "until"!_

_I had never expected to hear Edward say those words. When he said them, he spoke as if he didn't have the will to fight me on it any longer. It seemed like such a breakthrough, I decided to let the subject go - for now. _

_Looking at myself in the mirror I ran a brush through my hair a couple of times before clipping the burettes in place. My body was still human, but the Cullens saw me as one of their own. I couldn't help but wonder if they knew how that made me feel? _

As I clumsily sat up in bed, I came to the decision that today was the day I called Charlie. I had sent Renee e-mail after e-mail. I had even managed to write a letter or two to Charlie. Both of them pleaded with me to come home.

Seven days had pasted since Christmas, and it was the second of January.

I dressed quickly and after giving myself another look, I took in the lack of my knee brace it felt good to no longer be wearing it. The only clue left from my accident was the brace that my right ankle still sported.

"All right, Bella. It's time for you to face the music and call Charlie."

It wasn't something I wanted to do, but it was something I owed my Dad. Pulling whatever courage I had inside of me, I walked over to the phone and lifted it off of its cradle. Punching in Charlie's cell phone number, I listened to the rings as I waited for him to answer.

"_Chief Swan here._"

"Um, hi dad."

"_Bella, is that you. Are you all right? Where are you?"_

"Yes, dad, it's me. I'm fine. Did you get my Christmas presents?"

"_Yeah, yeah I got them. It was very thoughtful of you. Jacob enjoyed his as well. How in the world did you afford a part to the engine of that Rabbit he's working on?"_

"I've been saving up to get it."

"_Where are you, Bells?"_

I sighed before I answered him, "I can't tell you that, dad."

"_Why the hell, not? Is it because of the Cullens? Are you with them?" _Charlie pressed.

"It has nothing to do with them and everything to do with me. I just needed some space."

When Charlie spoke again, he sounded wounded. The fact that I couldn't tell him when I was coming home hurt him. Seemed like I was always hurting him, I had made my choice, Edward was my future, and Charlie and Renee were going to be my past. As much as it hurt me to say it, I was going to have to let them go. I would be too different.

"_Bella, I know I said things were going to be different after the last time. I'm sorry if I haven't kept my word."_

"It's not you or even mom, Dad. I just needed some time away from Forks to figure some things out."

"_Can you a least tell me when your coming home, Bella?"_

"I'll come home when I'm ready, Dad, that's the only thing I can say."

"_Bella, I…"_

"Yeah, Dad?"

"_I love you, Bells, that's all. Take care of yourself, and be safe."_

Hearing the sadness in Charlie's voice broke my heart. However I couldn't let that get to me. Staying away from Forks was the only way I knew to keep Charlie safe.

"I love you too dad, and the same thing back at ya, be safe and careful."

"_Always am Bells."_

"I'll call again soon, dad, all right?"

"_Okay, Bella, I'll be looking forward to it."_

"Bye, Dad."

"_Bye, Bella."_

Talking to Charlie had been hard, I wanted to tell him I was on my way home, but I had to do what was best for Charlie and that was to stay away until it was safe. Meaning no Volturi, coming after me and Edward, and no Newborn attack to worry about.

After I hung up the phone with Charlie, I felt trapped and claustrophobic. I had to get out of the house for a bit. Feel free even though I was anything but. Most of the Cullens had left to go hunting. Carlisle was at work, and I knew that Edward was somewhere in the house. He would hear me if I went out the door and I didn't really care. I was desperate for air. Just as I predicted Edward wasn't far behind my movements.

"Bella, wait a minute."

Edward studied me for a minute before speaking. His serious look was soon followed by a frown. Just seeing Edward's serious look followed by a frown had me wanting to laugh. But I didn't laugh. I knew the source of Edward's frown. He wanted to read my thoughts, but he couldn't - they weren't even on Edward's radar.

"I just needed some air, Edward. I've been trapped in the house for more than a month." I winced at how harsh my words sounded. "I didn't mean…" I let my words trail off as Edward draped a coat over my shoulders, before pulling me gently against him.

"Bella, everything you are saying to me is true. You have been trapped inside for too long. You have every right to be angry with me. I wounded your heart deeply. I regret what I did to you everyday. In fact, there is something I want to tell you. The second I realized that your heart had stopped beating, I kept thinking up ways to end my own life. There was no way Emmett and Jasper would help me end my life, so I planned to go to the Volturi and create a scene.

"I won't ask anything of you, but for you to allow me to stand here as you gather your thoughts."

We stood there in silence for a while. When I felt the first tear fall down my cheek, I wiped it away as quick as I could in the hopes that Edward hadn't noticed. I held on to an inward sigh, but it hadn't gone unnoticed. He turned me around in his arms in an attempt to get me to look at him. I didn't at first, so he started talking.

"Bella, if you want to go back to Forks, then we'll go back to Forks together."

I shook my head at him.

"It's not that. After hurting Charlie last spring I swore I'd never hurt him again. And I did the day I up and left to go in search of you. I'm just mad at myself."

"And me." Edward said this with a sadness in his voice.

I shook my head no at him.

"Mad at myself, yes, mad at you, not so much. Hurt by you, yes, with mending in progress."

Edward nodded at hearing my words, before deciding to speak again.

"Would you like to go on a walk with me?"

I had to suppress a giggle from finding its way free. It was such an _Edward _thing for him to say. It looked like I wasn't the only one on the mend. After my death and surprising return to the living, Edward was starting to mend his own torn heart as well. Smiling softly at him I answered, "I would love to go on a walk with you, Edward."

Thinking about what Edward had said earlier, I had to make sure I had heard him right. Hearing him talk about ending his life gave me a sense of Déjà vu. Almost as if he had talked once before about ending his life. The memory however was foggy. So I ended up asking me something else.

"The Volturi, they're like the keepers of the peace in the vampire world right?"

Edward chuckled telling me that my words were too kind to describe the Volturi.

"I'm sorry for laughing, you're not to far off. The Volturi are considered royalty in the vampire world. They make sure that we all follow the laws of our world.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing, "What, wait vampires have laws?"

Edward looked down for a second and gently kicked a rock.

"Well, there is only one law that we all must obey. Keep our existence a secret from the humans."

"That means I'm putting you and your family in danger."

My dear Edward just shook his head.

"Technically, I didn't tell you. You figured it out on your own."

Giving Edward's words some thought. I spoke again.

"If I'm not the reason then why are the Volturi coming here?"

Edward sighed before running a hand through his wild bronze-colored hair.

"It could be that Aro is just checking up on us. He has a desire to have me and Alice in his personal guard. He probably wouldn't mind adding Jasper to his little collection as well."

I couldn't help but ask, "So you've meet Aro in person?"

He shook his head as he answered me. "No, I haven't met him in person yet. He did however send me an invitation to join him several years before I met you."

Edward then stopped and turned to face me. Gently he lifted my chin up so my eyes met his.

"Bella, I'll protect you from them no matter what."

Looking into his warm golden gaze, I simply replied.

"I know you will, Edward." Once those words were spoken we shared a chaste kiss.

After talking for a bit more, we walked in relative silence. After a while I took Edward's hand in mine as we walked. My action seemed to surprise Edward at first before he gave me one of his trademark smiles. I smiled back at him and ran my thumb over the top of his hand. Edward's face soon took on a look of concentration. I knew that look of Edward's as well. It was the look he wore when he was wondering what I was thinking about.

Casting a glance in Edward's direction, I waited for him to ask me what I was thinking. He never asked me what was on my mind the whole time we were walking. Suddenly, Edward's eyes became hard as if he was focusing on something. In a flash he was standing in front of me.

"Stay behind me, Bella."

A low warning hiss came from Edward as four shrouded figures moved silently out of the shadows of the trees. My breath caught in my throat when I realized it must be members of the Volturi Guard. Edward had backed up to shield me from them. No matter what Edward might have thought, I knew that we were _trapped_.

An emotionless feminine voice spoke as three of them removed their hoods. "Hello, Edward. Master Aro would like a word with you."

Edward addressed the figures curtly. "Jane, Demetri, Felix." His eyes darted over to the figure that was still in its cloak. I knew the reason they had come here, they had come here for me. Though I was just as confused as Edward seemed to be, how had they managed to get passed Alice's sight?

The big brawny vampire Edward had addressed as Felix spoke next.

"The human comes with us as well."

A low menacing growl escaped from Edward's lips at Felix's words.

"Go to hell. Bella isn't going anywhere with you."

The blond girl spoke again. "Aro, wishes to meet the human you decided to invite into our world. You will do as the Master requested."

Through gritted teeth Edward spoke once more.

"Like I said, go to hell."

Edward was suddenly on his knees writhing in pain. I dropped to his side, not understanding what was happening to him. I then realized by the way that the young girl named Jane was staring at Edward that she was the cause of his pain.

"No, please! Please stop hurting him!" I cried out. Why had she chosen Edward as her target? It then dawned on me, some how Aro had found out about me. Torturing Edward was just so I would go with them. And Jane was right, hurting Edward was the _perfect_ way to get me to do what they wanted.

I'll go with you, just, please stop hurting him." Tears threatened to fall, but I willed them away.

With a smirk of triumph Jane stopped her attack on Edward. He lifted his head and narrowed his golden eyes at Jane. The one that had to be Demetri remained quiet, but he looked amused by what had just taken place.

Edward's voice was laced with pain from whatever torture Jane had just put him through.

"When my family sees that you're here, you won't get what you want."

Jane just smiled and her red eyes had a strange gleam in them.

"That's the beauty of our plan. Your family doesn't know we're here. Thanks to our newest member. Tamaria, you may remove your cloak now."

The hooded vampire was taller then Jane, but she was slender and curvy. Once her delicate hands had pulled back her hood, it revealed a stunning woman with wavy blond hair and ruby red eyes.

Jane continued, "Tamaria has the ability to blind the psychic. The little future- seeing vampire in your coven will not be able to see us, until we leave that is."

Jane then gave Edward an evil grin.

"Weren't you just trying to figure out how we were able to get the drop on you? It would seem that Tamaria's ability works on your mind reading as well."

As of yet, Jane hadn't tried to do anything to me so Edward didn't fight them in fear that they would hurt me. In honesty whatever it was that Jane had inflicted on Edward incapacitated him. The one named Felix grabbed Edward by one of his arms and hauled him up on his feet. Edward moved toward me and stood on my right. As the vampire called Demetri gave me a slight shove forward before speaking.

"Move those feet, princess, before I'm tempted to have a taste."

Edward gave Demetri a warning growl. But before, Demetri could reply to Edward's growl, Jane spoke to him, "Stop playing with them Demetri. You'll have plenty of time for that once we return to Volterra with them."

We were bothprisoners of the Volturi. Racking my brain I tried to remember where I had heard of Volterra before. Thinking back, I recalled that Edward had mentioned once that it was somewhere in Italy. I was left wondering what the Cullens would do when they realized that Edward and I had disappeared.

Moreover, what was going to happen to us once we reached Volterra, Italy?

There was only one thing that I could come up with: Edward and I were going to die.

It appeared one way or another, Edward and I were going to get to spend eternality together.

**A/N: A huge thanks to my beta TwiliteAddict. Lady Tazz, I hope you liked Tamaria - we will be seeing her again.**

**Playlist for Chapter 13: Sunday by Sia, Safest Place to Hide by the Backstreet Boys and Before I'm Dead by KidneyThieves was playing as the members of the Volturi Guard trap Edward and Bella.**


	14. Intuition

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time:**_

_**Bella POV**_

_As of yet, Jane hadn't tried to do anything to me so Edward didn't fight them in fear that they would hurt me. In honesty whatever it was that Jane had inflicted on Edward incapacitated him. The one named Felix grabbed Edward by one of his arms and hauled him up on his feet. Edward moved toward me and stood on my right. As the vampire called Demetri gave me a slight shove forward before speaking._

_"Move those feet, princess, before I'm tempted to have a taste."_

_Edward gave Demetri a warning growl. But before Demetri could reply to Edward's growl, Jane spoke to him, "Stop playing with them Demetri. You'll have plenty of time for that once we return to Volterra with them."_

_We were both prisoners of the Volturi. Racking my brain I tried to remember where I had heard of Volterra before. Thinking back, I recalled that Edward had mentioned once that it was somewhere in Italy. I was left wondering what the Cullens would do when they realized that Edward and I had disappeared._

_Moreover, what was going to happen to us once we reached Volterra, Italy?_

_There was only one thing that I could come up with: Edward and I were going to die._

_It appeared one way or another, Edward and I were going to get to spend eternality together._

**Chapter 14: Intuition**

**Carlisle POV**

I was on my way home from work, when my cell phone rang. Seeing that it was Alice, I pressed a button on the steering wheel.

"Yes, Alice dear, what can I help you with?"

"_Edward and Bella are gone! I can't see them, Carlisle!"_

Her panicked words confused me.

"Alice, calm down. What do you mean they're gone?"

"_I mean that I can no longer see their futures."_

"I'm on my way home. We'll figure this out together."

Ending my call with Alice, I pressed my foot on the gas a little more, urging the car to go faster. I was well aware of the implications of what Alice had said. However, there had to be another answer, there just had to be.

Edward wasn't just my son, he had been my best friend and companion in the years before Esme had come into my life. To lose him would be like losing a part of myself that only Edward knew. I just didn't know how my family and I could survive the loss.

I was almost home now, giving the car more gas it sped up the gravel driveway. Before I had barely opened the door, Alice was there standing beside the car with Esme.

"Carlisle, I'm so sorry didn't see! I couldn't see them until it was too late." Alice pleaded.

My wife looked up at me next as I took her hand within my own.

"Oh, Carlisle, what are we going to do?" Esme voice gave away her building fear.

I did what I could to try and console her.

"It'll be all right, Esme, dear. We'll get them back safe and sound." I said as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

I glanced over at Alice.

"Your vision…Are you sure it was the Volturi then?" I questioned her.

"Yes, I'm sure, they were wearing dark cloaks. I've never met a nomad who wore a cloak before," she replied.

"Alice, where's the rest of the family?"

For the first time since Alice had joined our family I watched as she bit down on her lip. Much in the same manner as Bella did when she was nervous about something.

"Alice?" I asked more firmly.

Sighing, Alice started talking rapidly.

"They left to see if they could track them from where Edward and Bella's scents stopped. I told them it wasn't a good idea. You know how hardheaded and stubborn the three of them can be, especially Emmett and Rose."

"Yes, Alice, I know very well indeed. It seems to be a trait that all my children have in common." I answered in an even voice irritated that we were risking splitting up with Volturi lurking in the area.

Knowing that Alice would see my decision, I grabbed Esme's hand and took off in the direction of Edward and Bella's lingering scents. Soon I picked up the scents of Rosalie and the others a mixture of roses, pine, and leather.

"Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, stop!" I yelled out at them.

The three of them slid to a stop hearing the fierceness in my voice that I rarely if ever used. Esme and I soon arrived at their side.

"Chasing after them blindingly will only get you killed. You have no idea what some of the members of the Volturi can do. We have to be very careful with how we approach this." I continued.

"Yeah, okay, Carlisle…but." Emmett tried to argue.

"There are no 'buts', Emmett. I want Edward and Bella safe and home with us as much as you do. However, if we aren't careful, it will cost us all our lives." I replied in a rational voice.

Rosalie folded her arms in front of her.

"You personally know some of the members, right? So you know all kinds of things about them." Rosalie questioned.

Taking in the scents around us I picked up Edward and Bella in addition to two of the Volturi I knew well. However, there were two scents that were unfamiliar too me.

"Felix and Demetri are the names of the two scents I recognize. The other two must have joined after I left Italy. Demetri is a tracker whose skills make James look like an amateur. Felix is known for his size, strength and fighting skills."

"What do you suppose we do then, Carlisle? Wait and see whether they decide to give them back to us in one piece?" Rose replied coldly.

I knew that none of them would take kindly to my idea. It however was the only solution I had right now.

"I will go and have counsel with Aro. Find out what crime Edward has committed."

I had no doubt as to what crime it was that they were accusing my son with. They needed to know the truth. Aro needed to be aware that Edward never told Bella about what we were. She had figured it all out on her own.

Esme was the first to disagree with the choice I had made.

"Carlisle, darling, you can't." Her tawny eyes pleaded with me as she held onto my hand more tightly.

Giving her hand a gentle squeeze in return, I spoke to her in a reassuring voice, "Everything will be fine, Esme, dear. Aro will see me; I will make them see reason somehow."

No matter how much I tried to soothe Esme's worries, she clutched my arm tighter.

"Carlisle, my heart will be broken enough if Edward and Bella don't return to us in one piece. If something happens to you I don't know if I could go on existing. The thought of losing all of you at once is too much to bear," Esme sobbed.

Tilting my wife's chin up, I looked deep into her eyes as I spoke, "I will come back to you, my sweet. If I'm too late to change anything and we have to mourn them, we will mourn our loss together as a family."

Leaning forward I captured Esme's lips with my own. Leaving my family wasn't going to be easy. It, however, needed to be done in order to have my family be whole again.

"I should go and prepare a flight to Italy."

Looking up from my wife, I turned to face the other four members of my family.

"Emmett, take care of Esme for me. I'm leaving you and Jasper in charge to protect this family while I'm away."

Before I could head back to the house, Rosalie stopped me.

"So you're going to just leave us here?" Rosalie asked.

"Rosalie, it's not like that and you know it. This is the way it has to be. I will not put the rest of you in danger."

There was only one way I could make them understand and that was to tell them the truth as to why I couldn't allow them to go with me.

"Aro is a collector; he is constantly looking for gifted vampires to join his guard. Aro wouldn't think twice about killing you, or Esme since you don't have the talents he would be looking for. He wouldn't think twice about ending Emmett, even with all his strength – it just wouldn't be enough to entertain him.

"That is why you are safer here." I finished.

Giving Esme one last kiss, I then turned and disappeared in a blur toward our home. Once securing the ticket for my flight, I called in to work and asked for the next five days off. Afterwards, as I was packing a small travel bag, Alice appeared in the doorway.

"Carlisle, won't you at least let me come with you? I could help out."

I smiled softly at her thoughtfulness.

"I appreciate your offer, Alice, but I think it would be best if you remained here where it's safer."

Alice just frowned at me.

"Carlisle?" she asked softly.

Knowing what Alice was going to say next, I walked over to comfort her.

"Alice, none of this was you fault. No one in this family counts you responsible for what happened. Stay here, please, Alice."

Alice being the fiery spirit she was wouldn't let it go…

"What if they decide not to let you or Bella leave? What if they don't believe you when you tell them that we had set a date for Bella's change?" Alice questioned rapidly.

Wanting to make her feel better I thought carefully about my next words.

"You saw me telling them that we have set a date for Bella's change?"

She nodded in answer.

"Then even if your sight gets blocked again, have faith that my talking to Aro has worked just like you just saw."

With my small duffel bag in hand, I made my way to my car to head to the airport. Opening the driver side door, I placed my bag in the passenger seat. Just as I was getting ready to slide into the driver's seat. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Esme disappear off of the porch. She was then standing beside my open car door.

"Even if you can't keep it, I need you to promise that the three of you will come back to me in one piece. I need that bit of _hope_ to hold onto no matter how small it is."

Giving my wife a small smile, I did my best to give her what she had asked for.

"As I said once before, everything will be fine. Hold onto the _faith_ you have in the three of us, as well."

I captured her lips into a deeper kiss then before. I was going in the hopes that Aro indeed valued my friendship and would spare us. I could _hope _Aro still found me to be _amusing_. I wouldn't allow my mind to even think what would happen if he no longer considered us allies…

"Don't worry so much Esme, darling; I will have them safe with me in no time."

Leaving my family behind in order to save Bella and Edward was one of the hardest things I had ever done in my long existence. I needed to focus on saving Edward and Bella and it would be impossible if the rest of my family was here.

My flight to Italy was quiet, until I caught the familiar scent of citrus and daisies. I sighed lightly as she slipped into the seat beside me.

"Yes, I know that you're going to reprimand me later. Jasper wasn't pleased with me following you, however, he also knows that there is no point in arguing with me. Especially when I told him you were going to need my foresight."

I sighed lightly as I gave Alice a small smile. She always had a way of getting what she wanted. Since the plane had been in the air for awhile there was nothing to do but accept Alice was coming along with me.

Our flight attendant, Jean, came over to us with two blankets.

"Would the two of you like a blanket?" she asked.

I gave her the most natural looking smile I could pull off.

"No, thank you, perhaps a pillow instead?"

Alice said "yes" to a blanket and asked for a pillow as well.

An hour later we landed at the airport in Tuscany. It didn't take me long to get my bearings and begin our journey to Volterra. But first I made a small detour. Alice questioned my decision.

"Carlisle, shouldn't we be going the other way?"

I nodded as I answered her.

"Normally, I would say yes. Only in order to not draw attention to ourselves, I think we should retrieve a car to drive."

This seemed to make Alice a little excited.

"Really, oh I'll do it! I have just the car in mind."

Before I could say anything else Alice disappeared. Then before a full minute had passed, a yellow Porsche pulled up. The passenger door opened in front of me.

Climbing into the car, I looked over at Alice and spoke to her in a firm tone.

"Alice."

She looked over at me from over the top of her sunglasses.

"I was hoping you wouldn't be against grand thief auto today considering the seriousness of our situation."

She was right. It was very important that we reach the home base of the Volturi as quickly as possible.

"For now, I will let it go. Once Edward and Bella are safe again, I expect you to return it and make things right."

Alice nodded in agreement with me and floored the gas pedal.

"Yes, of course I will, Carlisle," she grinned mischievously. She never eased up on the pedal and we sped through the windings roads in Italy.

"We're almost there, Alice. Volterra lies just over that rises over there."

Before I could say anything more, I noticed that Alice had stiffened up at the wheel.

"Alice, what is it? What did you see?"

"Aro has made his decision. Edward's life has been spared, but Bella's hasn't. He is going to kill her."

No! This couldn't be my son's resolve about keeping Bella human after the most recent events had begun to waver, I was certain of it. So why didn't Aro see Bella's inevitable change in Edward's thoughts?

Oh, son, don't tell me you have changed your mind again!

"We have to guard our thoughts from Edward. There is no need to worry him anymore then he already is."

"Carlisle, do you really think that we can just walk in unannounced?"

Though it wasn't like me to be so straight forward, this was my family. Aro was planning on harming a member of that family and I couldn't stand by and allow that to happen.

"Yes, it is the one way I know of that we can have any chance to speak on their behalf."

Alice grew quite for a moment before speaking again.

"Edward knows Aro's decision. If he does kill Bella, Edward plans on doing something that will make Aro take his life as well."

I was well aware of what Edward would do if Bella were to die. I had seen it before, several months ago.

"When Alice? When does Aro plan on killing them?" I questioned.

"Today at noon."

That only gave us ten minutes.

"Perhaps, a little faster, Alice."

Within a matter of minutes we were in reach of the compound. Leaving the car behind, we made our way down the familiar alley. When we paused at a metal grate in the ground, Alice looked at me with curiosity

"Carlisle, are you sure about this?" Alice asked.

I wasn't sure about how any of this would go. The only thing I could do was pray for the best.

"No, but it's the only plan I can think of. We will have to have faith that everything will be all right."

The city of Volterra was looming over us now. I had sworn I would never return here after I left centuries ago. Yet, my hand was being forced. I glanced behind me at Alice once more.

"Remember, Alice, we need to disguise our thoughts from Edward. So try not to think of too many of the things you normally would," I cautioned her.

As the seconds ticked by we were soon greeted by two vampires, a male and a female in dark cloaks. The male's scent was unfamiliar to me. I recognized the female's scent from the woods. She glared at me almost as if she knew where my thoughts had gone to.

"State your business here, vampire." Her voice was cold and had a slight Brooklyn accent to it.

So it was clear that Aro was still treasure hunting as he used to call it.

"I'm an old friend of Lord Aro's. My companion and I have come for a visit." The blonde female just continued to stare at me. The male vampire beside her spoke, "Let him past Tamaria, what he says is so. He is considered a dear friend by Master Aro."

The male vampire then turned to address us.

"If the two of you will follow me, I will take you to Master Aro."

My mind continued to think through a few things. It was very much a fact that Tamaria was a new addition to Aro's guard. So was the young man, who was acting like our escort. I couldn't think about Edward and Bella in fear Edward would get a small taste of my thoughts. So I looked at the young vampire that was leading us.

He was quiet like most of Aro's guard members. Yet he believed what I had said without question.

Once inside, our guide introduced himself to us.

"I'm Kele, you must be Carlisle and Alice. Edward has had all of you on his mind these last few hours," he said calmly.

He studied my reaction to his words before he spoke again. His words however weren't to answer the questions in my head.

"This way, please." Kele said smoothly.

He led us down a familiar tunnel. The stone stairway had been replaced by an elevator. It coasted upward until it slowed to a stop, chiming as it opened its doors to the awaiting lobby.

"Essere il benvenuto." The receptionist welcomed us warmly in Italian.

Kele acknowledged her with her name and a nod.

"Gianna." His voice was soft when he spoke to her.

Two large oak doors I knew all too well stood before us now.

"Master Aro, Lord Marcus and Lord Caius are through there."

As the heavy doors opened, they groaned in protest like they knew what lay behind them. Once they were open, my eyes looked across the room straight to Aro. There was a quick intake of breath that I knew belonged to Edward. He hadn't expected me to come after them.

Aro turned his head away from something to look at me.

"Ah, Carlisle, my old friend, how nice of you to come visit."

A/N: I hope you guys liked the chapter sorry it took me so long, RL has been a pain.

Chapter 14 was written to the Songs **"How We Operate"** by Gomez and **"How To Save A Life" by The Fray.**


	15. A Choice

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time:**_

**Carlisle POV**

"_E__ssere il benvenuto." __ The receptionist welcomed us warmly in Italian._

_Kele acknowledged her with her name and a nod._

"_Gianna." His voice was soft when he spoke to her._

_Two large oak doors I knew all too well stood before us now._

"_Master Aro, Lord Marcus and Lord Caius are through there."_

_As the heavy doors opened, they groaned in protest like they knew what lay behind them. Once they were open, my eyes looked across the room straight to Aro. There was a quick intake of breath that I knew belonged to Edward. He hadn't expected me to come after them._

_Aro turned his head away from something to look at me._

"_Ah, Carlisle, my old friend, how nice of you to come visit."_

**Chapter 15: A Choice**

**Edward POV**

As we moved toward the chamber where Aro and the others awaited our arrival, I pulled Bella closer to me. She whispered into my chest, "Edward, I'm scared. Are you?"

I answered her in a calm even voice, "No."

My answer was the last lie I intended to give Bella. I was indeed very scared. My fear wasn't for myself, but rather for Bella. Aro's mind was set before he even met us. Spare me and kill the human. He saw Bella as an expendable obstacle standing in the way of what he wanted.

Bella shivered once as she tightened her hold on my shirt and huddled closer to me. Concerned that the reason for her shiver was due to her closeness to me, I tried to move away from her, only to hear her whimper a little when I pulled away. "It will be all right, Bella." I did my best to soothe her worry even though it was justified.

We were mere inches away from the thick heavy oak door gracing the entrance to the main chamber inside of the Volturi Castle - Aro's throne room.

'_Splendid, they have returned with them! Simply wonderful.'_

Aro's thoughts were almost too joyful for my liking. The one thing I couldn't figure out was how he had learned about my involvement with Bella.

Once the doors opened, we were herded by Felix and Demetri into the room until we were standing before Marcus, Aro and Caius.

Caius's thoughts were cool and full of hate.

'_Wasteful, this is a waste of time. Let us kill the both of them, and be done with the lot of this.'_

"Edward, Bella so nice to meet the two of you."

Aro's words where just as exuberant as his thoughts. He addressed me with his mind.

'_I have heard so much about you. A rare find indeed, to think it was Carlisle who brought you into this world. If only we had gotten to you first.'_

"I've heard a lot about you as well, Aro. Though Carlisle did not view things as you do, he values his friendship with you."

Airy laughter escaped from Aro's lips.

"Hahahahaha, ah, marvelous!"

Aro came closer to me with his hand out stretched to take my hand.

'_I wonder what his thoughts hold within them?'_

"Then you know about my gift as well. May I?"

Knowing what Aro was about to do, I quickly let go of Bella's hand in fear of what he might see within her mind if we remained connected. She was mute to me, but that didn't mean she was safe from Aro's mind.

The second Aro touched my hand, he knew all of my secrets and deepest desires. I could see them running through his mind at breakneck speed. Aro was amused and delighted by how Bella's blood called to me. He was even witness to Bella's recent death and miracle return to me.

"It's stunning to see all the things that you have experienced for this human girl. The strength you must have to be so near to her. How you do it is still so very curious to me.

"I can assure you, it is not done without great effort." I answered flatly. I did not enjoy being an object of his curiosity. Aro seemed to be pondering my thoughts.

"Still - _la tua cantante! _Such a waste really_._"

He appeared to pity me.

A humorless laugh escaped my lips, "I don't see it as such, merely a price. One I willingly pay."

Aro's ruby-colored eyes darted over to look at Bella.

"Such a high cost for something so fragile, don't you think?"

"No, because each day I have the opportunity to be with Bella is worth it all."

My jaw tightened as I felt the tang of Aro's thoughts once more.

'_Ah but to have a taste would be simply delectable.' _Just remembering how appealing she is to you makes me…thirsty." Aro watched my actions closely, judging me. "Don't be disturbed, Edward. I don't mean to harm her."

He had to know I knew he was lying through his ancient teeth! What was he playing at?

He released my hand as he slowly turned to glance at Marcus and Cauis, before returning his attention back to us.

"I must tell you that your memories of Carlisle are a gift to me. I am gratified by his success with his vision."

Aro began questioning the conflict he saw going on with my thoughts. I knew I was the reason we had been brought here. My crime – exposing my existence to a human, it was the greatest crime I could have committed against my kind. There were only two outcomes that could right my wrong. Bella would have to die or join me in immortality. I didn't want to lose Bella again…

Yet there were things I wanted her to experience as a human before I robbed her of life. Events such as graduation, our wedding, if she would have me, and then there was college. After that, as long as Bella felt she would have no regrets, I would change her.

Aro, however, was demanding a choice - now. This was not how I wanted it to be…

"Traduzione di, non trovata, it is a great sadness. Then we will decide for you." Aro replied in a soft, sad, airy voice.

My body stiffened as Aro turned toward Bella. Would he strike now? If I attacked, neither Bella nor I would make it out in one piece. Aro's guard was prepared to end me if need be. Just as I was about to tell Aro that I would change Bella, Aro turned to me once more.

"It is very fascinating that only Bella's thoughts are mute to you. I can't help but wonder if I am able to…"

'_If I could just touch her hand ever so gently, Edward, we could see.'_

I didn't respond to Aro's request. He would have to ask Bella himself.

"May I?" He gestured toward Bella.

"You'll have to ask her," I answered in a flat tone.

Aro's eyes lit up as he looked to Bella.

"Ah, yes, how rude of me!" Aro exclaimed. "Bella, my dear, I am so very intrigued that you are the one exception to Edward's impressive gift—such a rare thing for us to encounter. I was wondering since our talents are so much alike, would you be so kind to allow me to see if I might be an exception?"

Bella cast an unsure glance at me. I nodded slightly to encourage her to let him touch her hand knowing he would satisfy his curiosity by force if need be. She then very slowly and cautiously extended her hand out toward Aro.

He smiled as he gently clasped her hand in his. After a few seconds, the grin that had been drawn on his face disappeared. I smiled to myself as I realized Bella was mute to Aro's gift as well. He was met by the same silence as I.

"Well now it seems that I too am denied your thoughts as well, my dear, Isabella. I wonder though if you are immune to some of our other gifted members?"

'_Jane would be a perfect way to test her.'_

I stiffened at hearing Aro's thought, but just as I was about to react, the doors to the room opened. I gasped in shock as the familiar scent of apples and moss greeted me, as well as the smell of oranges.

'_No, no it couldn't be,' _was my only thought. Perhaps it was merely someone who smelled like them. I couldn't bring myself to look until a gentle and familiar mind echoed in my head.

'_Forgive me, son. But I could not lose you again.'_

Aro looked away from Bella and focused his attention on his new guests.

"Ah, Carlisle my old friend! How nice of you to come visit."

Carlisle refused to look in my direction. His thoughts were filled relief at seeing me and Bella alive.

"Yes, it has been too long Aro. I apologize for that," Carlisle replied to Aro's enthusiastic statement.

I was surprised that Aro didn't go to Carlisle right away. This worried me. My worry increased when I read Aro's thoughts. He felt threatened by Carlisle ever so slightly due to the size and abilities of our coven.

He walked away from Bella and me to approached Carlisle and Alice.

"It pleases me to learn that your vision of finding others who share your dream of a non- human diet; has come true. Even if you did sire most of them yourself…"

Carlisle didn't allow Aro's words get to him. If he did his guard would be down and it wouldn't end well for him.

His voice then took on a serious tone. "As fond as I am of you, Carlisle, you know that there are rules that must be followed."

"What rule has Edward broken?" Carlisle questioned in my defense.

"He let a human learn of our existence. You know the punishment for such a thing." Aro continued.

Carlisle wasn't falling for Aro's play with words.

"I have no doubt you know how he feels about Bella; as well as the recent events that have happened."

Aro agreed with my father's words, "It's true that I have seen everything..."

Aro trailed off as he took hold of Carlisle's hand. He pulled in a quick breath before releasing Carlisle's hand.

"Such a charmingly interesting family you now have. It truly is. Actually, I was about to test Bella's curious gift when you arrived. " Aro replied and then turned his attention back to us.

'_Who to have test her astounding ability?'_

Hearing his plan, my body started to move forward before his words left his lips.

"Jane, my dear."

"No!" I yelled out as I moved forward to shield Bella from Jane. I couldn't let them use her in an experiment that I wasn't sure of the outcome. But I had barely taken a step forward before unimaginable pain seared my body all the way to my bones.

I couldn't make an audible sound as Jane continued to inflict her torture on my mind. The sound of Bella crying out was shortly followed by someone's curious thought. Carlisle's gentle voice came after it.

"No, please, please don't do this again!" Bella cried out.

'_Again?' Aro questioned._

"Aro, please put a stop to this. You are well aware of how Edward feels about her. It is purely instinct he is acting on. Again, I ask you to stop this." Carlisle pleaded.

'_Have faith, Edward.' _It took me a moment to realize that Alice had moved away from Carlisle to comfort me. _'Edward, please control yourself, we want to bring you home in one piece.' _ Alice's thoughts revealed how scared she truly was.

"That's enough Jane, my dear." Aro spoke coolly.

My body started to relax once it was sure that the searing pain was gone.

Jane smiled wickedly as she set her sights on Bella. I held my unneeded breath as I waited for my love to scream out in pain. It, however, never came. Only the shrill laughter of Aro's astonished amusement filled the great room.

"This is a spectacular find you have! It will be a shame to destroy such potential talent."

Aro set his gaze on Bella and started slowly towards her as he spoke, "It seems only right that I should ask-would you like to join us here, my dear, sweet Isabella?"

I felt myself sinking down into darkness as I awaited Bella's reply. Aro was willing to give Bella what she wanted - immortally - right now with no waiting. Why couldn't I have done it when she asked?

But I knew why. I was afraid that she would come to hate me for taking her life. I didn't want her to have regrets...

"Thank you, I…" her voice trailed off. "I don't wish to join you; I just want to stay with Edward."

I tensed as I stood beside Alice. This wasn't going to end well. No one denies Aro of what he wants.

"That truly is lovely, however, my sweet, our rules were meant to be followed. Felix."

"Noooo!" I cried out, sure that Felix was going to go for Bella. One flick of his wrist would snap Bella's neck in an instant. Aro, however, had something else in mind. My eyes moved to find Demetri holding Bella to him while Felix and Kele restrained Carlisle.

Aro wanted me to chose, my sire or my love.

"Perhaps, we merely need to motivate you, Edward." Aro tilted his head in curiosity.

'_It's all right son, I'll understand.'_

Though simple, Carlisle's thoughts tore at something deep within me. Carlisle could have over powered at least one of them, but he feared for Bella's safety. He too would wait for my decision.

"Stop! Ki-ll, kill me, not them. Please kill me, not them." Bella's voice shook as she cried out in panic.

Aro was mystified by Bella's words and held up his hand in command. Silence replaced chaos.

"To think that one such as you would care for soulless creatures like us."

Anger sprung into Bella's eyes like a flame. "You don't know a thing about their souls! They are nothing like _you_."

Aro's eyes narrowed; his patience was slowly running out.

"Insolence!"

I died slowly as the back of Aro's hand connected with the side of Bella's face. She cried out instantly and fell to the floor. I could only imagine the damage that had been done to her fragile body.

I was certain Aro was going to kill her now in front of us and make us watch. I struggled against my captor to get free when the sound of Alice's voice stilled me.

"Wait! Bella will become one of us I've seen it. We just need time to prepare!"

Alice's words intrigued Aro and again he froze before turning away from Bella to allow Alice to approach him.

Pulling off one of her long red satin gloves, she gave Aro her hand and let her visions of Bella flow to Aro.

_Bella's birth as a newborn with bright red eyes and then months later with gleaming golden eyes of my family as the two of us ran together in the woods._

"Enchanting to see the things before they have happened! Truly enchanting, my dear."

Aro turned and waved toward us. "Go on now, go and make your preparations."

I rushed to Bella's side desperate to get her out of here before Aro reconsidered. Carlisle and Alice wished for the same and moved at vampire speed.

Cauis called after us, "Just remember that we don't give second chances. We will be checking in to see if you have fulfilled our deal."

I then heard Marcus's soft thoughts enter my head.

'_The bond the two of you share is stronger than any one I have ever felt. Treasure her always. You should go now- they are coming.' _

I held Bella close to me as I did my best to usher her out the door. Heidi was walking down the corridor with a large group of unsuspecting humans trailing behind like blind sheep being led to the slaughter.

The movement of Bella's head as she turned it slightly alerted me to the smell of her leaking blood, making my hold on her tighten.

"Don't look back, Bella, just keep moving forward."

Bella jumped and cowered in my arms when the first shriek of terror filled the air behind us. Carlisle and Alice winced as more screams followed it. Carlisle's thoughts mirrored the sadness he felt.

'_All of those lives wasted some where so young. But thank God you and Bella are safe.'_

Once we were out of Volterra, I was able to look at Bella's injures more fully. I gently turned her face to look at it.

"Oh Bella, I'm so sorry."

The skin of her left cheek was weeping clear but blood tinged fluid from a tear in the first layer of skin. Bella's cheek was a dark purple and her eye was already turning black. The cheek bone must be broken.

I was thankful of one thing - Aro hadn't killed her and he could have done so with that one slap. The sound of Bella groaning in pain brought me out of my thoughts. Carlisle was now examining the damage done to Bella's face.

"I imagine there is a break in the cheek bone. We'll get some ice on it soon. Can I get you something for the pain, Bella?"

Bella shook her head at Carlisle. "No, I'm okay. The pain isn't that bad."

I may not be able to read my love's thoughts; I was, however, becoming very skilled at reading her eyes.

"Bella, you don't have to lie to make us feel better. If you are in pain then you should let Carlisle give you something for it."

My gaze never left Bella's. The contusions and laceration to the left side of Bella's face was another cruel reminder just how fragile Bella's life was, and it was wearing down my resolve. She had almost died _again_ today.

Blocking out everything else around me, my lips feverishly took hold of Bella's. I allowed my cool breath to linger across Bella's abused cheek in hopes of giving her a brief freedom from the pain. I was as breathless as Bella when I pulled out of our kiss. Gently resting my forehead against hers, I looked deep into her eyes as I spoke, "Two more days, Bella. It's all I want before I give you the answer you have been looking for. We have some time before we catch our flight so you can rest now."

_I was about to lose the battle, however, I fully intended to win the war._

**A/N: I hope some of my readers aren't too upset with this chapter. This story is coming to a close soon. With 2 chapters left, 3 at the max. **

**Chapter 16: Moving Forward**

**Chapter 17: Frozen**

**Chapter titles subject to change.**

**Music in my playlist as I was writing, Volturi Waltz, The Volturi , and You're Alive all by Alexandre Desplat **

**A huge, warm, thank you, to everyone who has been supporting this story. Though it is not award winning story. I win every time I read a heart warming review about it.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	16. All I Wanted

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time:**_

**Edward POV**

_"Oh Bella, I'm so sorry."_

_The skin of her left cheek was weeping clear but blood tinged fluid from a tear in the first layer of skin. Bella's cheek was a dark purple and her eye was already turning black. The cheek bone must be broken._

_I was thankful of one thing - Aro hadn't killed her and he could have done so with that one slap. The sound of Bella groaning in pain brought me out of my thoughts. Carlisle was now examining the damage done to Bella's face._

_"I imagine there is a break in the cheek bone. We'll get some ice on it soon. Can I get you something for the pain, Bella?"_

_Bella shook her head at Carlisle. "No, I'm okay. The pain isn't that bad."_

_I may not be able to read my love's thoughts; I was, however, becoming very skilled at reading her eyes._

_"Bella, you don't have to lie to make us feel better. If you are in pain then you should let Carlisle give you something for it."_

_My gaze never left Bella's. The contusions and laceration to the left side of Bella's face was another cruel reminder just how fragile Bella's life was, and it was wearing down my resolve. She had almost died __again__ today._

**Chapter 16: All I Wanted **

**Bella POV**

As I had come to expect from the Cullen's endless resources, we were on the next flight out of Italy and on our way home. Our connecting flight in Paris didn't leave until the next day for New York. I must have looked pretty bad, because Edward said something to Carlisle. He nodded and then left with Alice. They both came back fifteen minutes later with keys to rooms in a near by hotel.

I wrapped my arm around Edward as he carried me through the door of one of the rooms Carlisle had rented for the evening.

I was well aware of what Edward's agenda was. He was going to put me to bed and then go next door to talk to Carlisle and Alice. After everything we had just been through I didn't want him to leave yet and I clung to him.

"Bella?" Edward asked softly.

I knew what he was asking, he wanted me to let go so he could lay me down.

"No, I don't want to yet." I answered as I leaned against him more allowing my abused cheek to rest on his cool, smooth jaw line.

"You're cold, and smooth skin feels so nice on my cheek right now." I then glanced into his darkened amber eyes. "But you need to feed, so I guess I'll just have to let go for a little while."

Edward sat down on the end of the bed. He was silent as the two of us just stared into each others eyes in the dimly lit room. Our lips were so close, and his sweet minty breath was blowing gently across my face.

"Bella."

His voice had a huskiness to it I had never heard before.

"Yes, Edward?"

It was in that moment I realized a kiss was inevitable, and my pulse instinctively quickened. When our lips touched his lips were gentle as our lips did their best to bond themselves with one another. Time seemed to slow to a stop as we sat on the bed kissing. I pulled away a little to catch my breath.

I had barely taken a breath before Edward had taken my lips captive once more. His kiss was filled with wanting, as if his life depended on my kiss to live. This was a side to Edward I had never seen before. He lay back taking me with him. My mind was a roller coaster of thoughts as I felt Edward's hands wondered over every curve of my body as if planting each one to memory – actually, he probably was doing just that.

I gasped suddenly when I felt Edward cool breath against the nape of my neck. The feel of his lips on my neck made my heart start to pound rapidly inside my chest.

'_Yes, yes, yes!' _I chanted inside my head, grateful that he couldn't hear it.

He was panting slightly when he stopped his gentle ministrations to my neck. Edward then tucked his nose in the nape of my neck. It took me a moment to realize that he was listening to the sound of my erratic and now calming heart beat.

"I have no problem staying here, if it's what you want. In fact, I would love nothing more then to stay right here."

I'm not sure how long we lay there together, Edward with his arms around me and me with my face lying against the cool skin of his before I broke the silence with my shaking voice.

"I was really scared, Edward. I thought they were going to kill you. I didn't think we were going to make it out of there. I know, I was stupid for saying what I did, but I just couldn't let him talk about all of you like that. I just couldn't."

Somewhere during my outburst of feelings, I had started weeping. All the fear that I had been holding onto just came spilling out of me.

"Shhhh, you're safe. We're all safe, and it's because of you. I wouldn't have let them harm you."

I didn't resist his comfort and fell into a peaceful sleep in Edward's arms despite their chilliness. Later in the night, my peaceful dreams turned into torturous nightmares.

_Victoria appeared, taunting me with her laughter and promising me that if she couldn't finish me then she would find other ways to make me suffer._

_Her laughter repeated over and over again in my head. Victoria continued to haunt me with her cruel laughter and words._

"_I promise you that you and your mate will pay for what you did."_

_In the darkness behind her, several sets of blood red eyes stared back at me. The very sight of them sent a shiver coursing through my spine._

_Victoria was then suddenly right in front of me. She was so close that her cool breath was causing goose bumps to form on my skin. _

"_I will take everything from you until you beg me for your death."_

_From nowhere, Edward appeared in my dream and stood protectively in front of me._

"_I'll never let you hurt her."_

_Victoria sneered at Edward, "You won't have a choice."_

_I stood horrified as I watched as Victoria took a hold of Edward. He struggled as if there was someone else holding him as well, but I saw no one but Victoria._

"_Say goodbye to your love, just like I had too." Victoria seemly whispered into my ear._

_Tears started to fall when I realized that there was no way for me to save him and Victoria had won. _

_My heart fractured apart at the metallic sound that screeched inside my ears as Edward was ripped apart in front of me._

"_N-noooooooooooo!"_

_In that one second I had faded away into nothing._

My body jerked as if trying to fight the darkness engulfing me. Thankfully, it awakened me from my frightening nightmare. I bolted upright, and my body slammed into something hard. My arms shot out on instinct and wrapped around the form in front of me.

My cheeks were already wet from my earlier tears, but in my relief at knowing that it hadn't happened, the tears just continued to flow free. Edward began to soothe me by gently combing his fingers through my hair.

"Shhhh, Bella everything is all right it was just a dream." Edward cooed to me in a soft tone.

"It was more like a nightmare, but it felt so real." I sobbed into his chest.

"She hasn't forgotten, Edward; she's still looking for me. And she's not going to stop until she finds me." I said firmly.

"Who are you talking about, Bella? Edward questioned.

I knew he had to know already but I answered him any way.

"Victoria."

"Bella it was…" Edward started.

I cut Edward off as fast as I could, "just a dream. Yeah, I know that, but it felt like she was standing right next to me!"

It was going to be impossible to get Edward to take my dream seriously. So I sighed and laid back down in the bed and rolled over on my side away from Edward.

"Just forget it." I said with as much coldness as I could muster.

The left side of my face was throbbing again. My pain medicine had worn off or my crying had brought the pain back. As I moved to brush a stray strand of hair out of my face, my fingers graze one of the barrettes that Edward had given me for Christmas with his family's crest on them.

Even if he believed my dream was just that, I was still a member of his family even if I didn't share their name and should be taken as seriously as every other member.

I came out of my angry thoughts long enough to realize that Edward had left my side and was now talking to Carlisle and Alice in the next room. Sadly they were speaking in such hushed tones I couldn't make out what they were saying to one another.

Edward returned from next door and sighed.

"Bella, tell me about your dream."

"Why? You don't care about it. You're just asking because they told you too." I assumed.

All I wanted was for the rest of Edward's resolve to crumble away. I was a liability in this glass body of mine. I knew he was aware of it. I had had so many close calls and then I had died and then come back - if that was a divine sign that the two of us were meant to be, I didn't know what was.

"Bella, I apologize if it sounded like I didn't care about your dream. I really do want to hear about your dream if you can remember it."

"Victoria was there. She was laughing, taunting me. She swore to get her revenge for James's death. Then there were all of these red eyes all around me in the darkness. She then said something about taking away everything I cared about.

"She made me watch as she ripped you apart right in front of me. And there wasn't anything I could do to stop it. You were gone and I was alone all over again."

This time it was Edward who softly swept my hair out of my face.

"Bella, Nothi…" I lost it before he could finish.

"You don't _know_ that! I don't know if all of my dream will come true of not, but I know one thing - Victoria won't stop until one of us is dead."

Edward was silent for a little while before he spoke again.

"We'll do everything we can to be ready for her," he said in the hopes of appeasing me.

I was still doing my best to ignore the massive headache that threatened to make my head explode. I was physically and emotionally drained once more. I was starting to think that this was my punishment for falling in love with a vampire.

"Bella, love, how are you feeling? Your cheeks are rather flushed," Edward asked in a worried tone.

"I just have a little bit of a headache is all. I'm sure it will be gone as soon as I get some sleep."

Edward, however, wasn't fooled by my rouse.

"I'll let Carlisle know, and he can give you something for it. In the mean time I'm going to get you a cool compress and something to eat and drink." He then disappeared out of the room.

I sighed letting out a breath I didn't know I had been holding. Carlisle appeared in the doorway with a bottle of Tylenol in his hands.

"Edward told me you had a headache. How bad is the pain, Bella?" Carlisle's voice was so soothing and I answered him truthfully.

"To be honest I feel like an anvil is pressing down on my head."

His cool hand came up to feel my forehead. "You have a little bit of a fever as well. This should help with both." Carlisle dropped two capsules into my hand and handed me a glass of water.

I smiled up at Carlisle as I took them. "Thank you, Carlisle, for everything. You know I don't know why Edward is so worried with finding a cold compress. His or your cool touch works just the same."

Carlisle left too and in the quiet dark, I must have fallen asleep.

The next thing I knew I woke up in Edward's room that was in his family's home in New York. I couldn't believe I had slept through the whole plane ride. I vaguely remembered getting on board the plane. I was sure I was dreaming again but then Edward appeared with a tray filled with breakfast foods.

Yawning I sat up in the massive bed Edward had bought me. I quickly placed a hand over my mouth, while I used the other one to try to tame the tangled mass that was my hair.

"Bella, what on earth are you doing?' Edward clucked.

"I didn't want to offend you with my morning breath; my hair is a mess! I most likely look…" My voice trailed off as I remembered the current events that had unfolded a few days ago.

Remembering what had happened I lifted a hand and gingerly touched my left cheek. It no longer burned or throbbed like before. I could imagine how ugly it looked now, my eyes was probably still black as well.

"I probably look horrid, don't I? All because I'm a stupid human…at least that's what Rosalie thinks. Not even Jasper and Emmett want you to keep me. They knew I would be nothing but trouble. Maybe…they should have…" I froze as Edward chastised me.

"Stop it, just stop Bella!" Edward's tone was filled with anger.

Something shimmered inside of his eyes that I had never seen before.

"Where is all of this coming from, Bella? I don't understand why you would say this." He whispered in a sad voice.

I wasn't sure myself where all of that had come from. I was with Edward. I had him back and we had survived. Yet I wasn't completely whole yet. Edward was sitting next to me on the bed, his thumb and forefinger gently stroking my abused cheek.

"Bella, this bruise could never take away how beautiful you are. It is one of many battle scars that we share. If mine could be visible I would gladly show them."

I then noticed that Edward seemed to be struggling to say something else.

"Bella, this wasn't an easy decision to make. Especially, when I'm not sure I have a soul. It's selfish but I can't exist without you in my world. So if I could just have a human you until graduation, I'll grant your request myself if that's what you want."

His voice was calm yet there was a trace of sadness in it as well.

_All I wanted_ was forever with Edward, and now he was prepared to grant it. All I had to do was wait until after graduation. It was four months away, could I really wait that long?

"Does that mean we're going back to Forks?" I asked.

"In about a week or so, but only if you're ready," he replied.

I took a drink of the orange juice Edward had brought me as I gave his words some thought.

"So waiting till graduation is the condition to becoming a vampire?"

Edward nodded his head. "Yes, it's one of them."

"What's the second one?" I asked him curiously.

"Marry me, Isabella Marie Swan," he said in that velvet voice that made me melt.

I bit my lip at hearing Edward's proposal. But instead of answering him, I changed the subject.

"Am I allowed to have a condition?" I asked.

Edward just smiled at me.

"Anything you want, Bella," he said and then added, "Within reason, my love." Was that sadness I heard in his voice? I couldn't be sure.

My reply to his words was simple. "Okay."

I found myself fascinated by the ribboned seam of the blanket on the bed.

"Oh, God, everyone heard my words from earlier, didn't they?" I questioned.

"No, Carlisle is at work, Emmett took Rosalie hunting, and the others decided to join them."

"Kiss me, Edward," I whispered so low I almost didn't hear it myself.

Edward brushed a kiss on my cheek followed by one on my forehead. I leaned forward and tried to capture Edward's lips with mine. Sensing what I wanted he gently pressed his lips to mine. He was my air and I needed him in order to continue.

I could feel Edward brace his hands on either side of me as our kissed intensified. In one blurry second Edward was suddenly laying on the bed. One of his hands tenderly cupped the right side of my face as we continued to kiss.

Edward's free hand roamed down over my over my left hip, stopping at my waist there was a slight _pop _as the button to my jeans broke under his touch. I was able to undo two of the buttons on his shirt before Edward pulled out of our tangle of arms and hands.

"Not like this, not while you're still breakable."

He got up from the bed with the half-eaten tray of food and walked to the door.

His eyes refused to meet my when he spoke again.

"Get some more rest, Bella; we'll talk more about this later."

He cast me a sorrowful look before disappearing out the door.

My foolish heart was still racing, obviously oblivious to the let down I had just received. Edward would say it was just my teenage hormones getting the best of me. I however, knew that it was a little more than that. I didn't see myself as a teenager anymore. I was a grown woman who knew what she needed.

My very soul ached to be completed. I need my other half - I needed Edward. There was only one other way to get what I wanted and that was to give Edward an answer he wanted to hear.

'_I'm going to have to say yes and become Mrs. Edward Anthony Cullen. Charlie and Renee are going to kill me.'_

**A/N: It's down to the wire - only one chapter left. Will the end be what you imagined or will there be another twist to come? Stay tuned for the Final Chapter of Lunar Eclipse.**

**Playlist for Chapter 16:**

**All You Wanted by Sounds, Under Radio featuring Alison Sudol, **

**Running Up That Hill by Placebo, and Down by Jason Walker**

**Thanks again for reading and reviewing.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	17. Needs and Votes

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

_**Last Time: **_

_**Bella POV**_

_Edward's free hand roamed down over my over my left hip, stopping at my waist there was a slight pop when the button to my jeans broke under his touch. I was able to undo two of the buttons on his shirt. Before, Edward pulled out of our touch._

"_Not like this, not while you're still breakable." He got up from the bed with the half eaten tray of food and walked to the door._

_His eyes refused to meet my when he spoke again._

"_Get some more rest Bella; we'll talk more about this later." He cast me a sorrowful look before disappearing out the door._

_Edward would just say it was my teenage hormones getting the best of me. I however, knew that it was a little more then that. I didn't see myself as a teenager anymore. I was a grown woman with needs. _

_My very soul ached to be completed. I need my other half, I needed Edward. There was only one other way to get what I wanted and that was to give Edward an answer he wanted to hear. _

'_I'm going to have to say yes, and become Mrs. Edward Anthony Cullen. Charlie and Renee are going to kill me.'_

**Chapter 17: Needs and Votes**

**Edward POV**

I was well aware of Bella's feeling about marriage; Renee had drilled it into her head over and over. However, there was no way for me to change how I felt about it. If Bella was going to be with me for eternity, I wanted her to be my wife first. It was the right thing to do since the more I thought about changing Bella, the more I came to see how intimate the action really was. So if I was going to do it myself instead of Carlisle, wouldn't it be even more potent if I was changing my human wife?

Knowing better then to press her for an immediate answer, I had let it go. But I wondered, how long could I wait? I was all too aware of my own wanting for Bella and my own desires. To feel her body close in around mine as our bodies become one was almost too much to stand, as the button on her jeans could attest. The only thing that had stopped me from getting intimate with her was my fear of hurting her.

Still, the second I pulled away from her there was no denying the rejection I saw in her eyes. Once again my actions had hurt her. If Bella thought all of the scars that adorned her body here and there made me love her less, I may have just inadvertently confirmed her fears.

If I could only get her to see the truth of the matter was that I desired to have her body like nothing else. After almost losing her twice, once to death and then to the Volturi, made a couple things very clear: I loved Bella, so much so that I hadn't wanted her to be cursed like me yet I couldn't exist in a world in which that she no longer did. So what choice did I really have?

I continued to stare out the window. My topaz eyes glanced over at Bella. Her arms were wrapped around one of the extra pillows as she mumbled in her sleep.

"He's gonna… win… love him… so much though."

I raised an eyebrow at hearing Bella's words. It appeared that she was dreaming about the words I had spoken to her this morning. Before I could give her words more scrutiny, I picked up vague thoughts coming from Rosalie before she tapped lightly on the door. I answered loud enough for her to hear but not to wake up Bella.

"She's asleep now, Rosalie."

A second hadn't passed before she turned the knob and inched into the room.

"Has her fever broken? Carlisle is in the middle of his shift or I would have asked him," she asked softly.

I was slightly taken aback by Rosalie's genuine concern for Bella. I answered her as I nodded, "Yes, the fever she developed has broken. Carlisle mentioned it might have been stress related."

I watched with guarded eyes as Rosalie made her way over to Bella's bedside.

'_Take a chill pill, Edward. I'm not going to bite her.'_

I released a sigh as I continued to watch Rosalie's interaction with my Bella. She used her fingers to gently brush as stray strand of Bella's hair out of her face.

"She going to say yes - you know, to all of your conditions. Bella loves you more then I thought possible for a human to love one of us."

There was sadness in Rosalie's voice that I had never heard before. Her thoughts were guarded from me.

"It was foolish of her to stand up to Aro like that. Still I was impressed, it's not something a normal human would do for the likes of us."

Rosalie looked over at me before casting her gaze back at Bella.

'_I don't agree with her choice, but she's saved you more than once and that means something to me.'_

Horrifying and familiar images flickered through my head from Rosalie's last night as a human. I grimaced at Rosalie's reason for bringing them up.

"Don't worry, I won't share it with her yet. However, since Bella thinks I hate her, she will need to know my story some day to understand where I come from."

There was a part of me that never wanted Bella to know all the dark shadows of my family's past, and how each one came to be what we are now. Rosalie, Jasper, Esme, even Alice had such frightening pasts, I couldn't imagine how upsetting it would be for Bella to hear them knowing how much she cared for them.

But Rosalie was right, Bella had the right to know the whole truth if my family was willing to share it, especially if she was to join this life and this family. Considering she had mumbled something in her sleep the night before about taking a vote on it, it would only be fair for her to know everything.

Strangely though, when she had awoken she never mentioned it, so I assumed she didn't recall her dream and the truth was, I hoped that Bella wouldn't remember it. But my little lamb wasn't that stupid, she was making sure to cover all of her bases. I knew there would be no way around what she wanted. Bella knew that my resolve was breaking. In the end, I knew I would give Bella whatever she wanted.

Several days passed and neither of us mentioned marriage nor the plans for Bella's change. We just tried to enjoy each other's company and looked for some semblance of "_normal_".

Tonight, the house was quiet except for the soft melody coming from my piano. My family had gone hunting for the evening and Bella had decided to take a shower.

I smiled as the sweet scent of strawberries mingled with the scents of freesia and lavender. It told me that Bella was finished with her shower and would be joining me soon.

"Try, try again" was the saying, so I decided to ask her to be my wife once more. I knew I wasn't making it easy on myself, as my family was always reminding me. Alice for one kept telling me _"Just do it already, Edward." _But I was adamant too – if Bella was going to be bound to me in immortality, I wanted to be bound to her in her mortality.

Hearing Bella padding down the stairs, I finished up the piece I had been playing. A minute later, Bella was rounding the corner to enter the living room; I smiled at the mere thought of her being near me.

Placing my fingers on the keys, I started playing Bella's lullaby. Its gentle tone relaxed me as if soothing the beast within.

Bella's voice only added to the beautiful melody, "I never get tired of hearing you play this one. It was one of the first ones you played for me."

"It's also the very first I ever wrote with you in mind," I said with a playful tone my voice.

Hearing Bella yawn, my fingers paused on the keys of the piano as I turned to look at her. What I saw caused the air to freeze inside my lungs. Bella stood behind me with her hair tousled and wet from her shower, wearing nothing but one of my dress shirts, and only the three bottom buttons were buttoned.

"Bella?" I managed to croak in a whisper.

If my body wasn't frozen stone, I was sure that I would have melted into a puddle on the floor. I bit down on the inside of my cheek as I watched Bella anxiously chew on her bottom lip. She then proceeded to play with a strand of her hair.

"Um, Edward, before I went to bed, I just wanted to let you know that you win," she said as she placed a kiss on my cheek.

Without another word, Bella turned and headed toward the stairs. I can't really remember when I decided to go after her. As my lips captured hers, I gripped the end of the banister, splintering the wood inside my hand. I didn't allow myself anytime to think about the banister before sweeping Bella into my arms and disappearing up the stairs to our room.

Reaching my room, I stopped just inside the door to close it. I then set Bella down on her feet as I broke our kiss. I inhaled her scents deeply, an intriguing mixture of her fresh flowery scent was the light musky scent of her desire.

Alice, Emmett and even Carlisle had continuously told me that there was a way for us to be intimate with Bella without deflowering her before our wedding, and I was well aware that I was about to play with that fire tonight. The monster that was nestled deep within me hummed. It was going to take all of my control...and then some tonight.

Now I understood why Alice had goaded me into going hunting last night with her. Why she had abstained from feeding, giving her kill to me instead. Alice had seen what Bella had planned and had hid it from me!

I would deal with my pixie sister later. My attention quickly returned to a panting Bella. I had her up against the wall, my hands on either side of her.

My unusual velvet voice was huskier than I thought it could be as I spoke to Bella.

"Since you have said yes to one of my conditions, I will give in to a modified version of one of yours. We will practice and see if I can control myself around you without hurting you. The lacy blue panties that are hidden beneath my shirt stay on. The same goes for my unmentionables as well as my pants."

I needed to set boundaries if I was going to keep in control of my actions.

"Those are some strict rules there, Cullen," she said in a playful tone.

"Nothing is too strict if it will keep you safe," I said as my eyes raked over Bella's exposed skin.

Leaning forward I moved in to capture Bella's lips with mine. There was no denying how I felt about Bella. I was vaguely aware of the wall giving away to the increase of pressure as I moved to kiss her. My eyes then darted over to the right side of the wall, where a medium size hole gaped back me.

Bella's soft warm hands caressed my cheeks. Knowing what she wanted, I turned my head toward her with pleading eyes.

"Don't even think it, Edward Anthony Cullen. You won't hurt me," she scolded.

"Bella, look at what I just did to the wall!" I said angry at myself.

The feeling of Bella's slim fingers playing with a few strands of my unruly hair started to calm me as she spoke again, "It's just a wall, Edward. If you were going to hurt me physically, you would have done it by now. I trust you, completely."

The soft scent of her arousal enveloped me once more, making the hole in the wall a distance memory. I moved the two of us to the bed.

"I never thought I would be so happy to have a bed in my room as I am now."

Laying Bella on the bed, I gripped the sides of my shirt and pulled. The popped buttons and torn seams allowed the shirt to fall open and down her shoulders. Bella wasn't wearing a bra so her breasts were free, allowing me a perfect glance at how round and perfect they were.

"You're beautiful."

I didn't have a clue as to where to start. I swallowed the venom that was pooling in my mouth as I gazed down at Bella. I knew that I had to taste her skin. I started with another soft kiss to her lips, before allowing my touch to slowly glide down the nape of her neck.

She moaned lightly at the feel of my touch, arching her back lightly as she did so. I grinned as I took in this new information. From her neck, I ran gentle kisses down to the valley of her breast. I grew hard with my own needs that I knew would have to wait. My tongue swirled around one of her taut nipples, and I sucked it as gently as I could.

Bella had shifted her hips so she could grind against me has I continued my careful ministrations with her. I moved to her other nipple to repeat what I had done to the first. Bella started to move her hips in time to my actions with her nipples.

"Oh, Edward!" she cried out.

I soon locked my lips with hers once more, grinding my hips in time with hers now. The monster within me screamed out at me.

"_Take her now!"_

The sensation of our bodies pressing against each other was overwhelming, and Bella's body began to spasm beneath me. Fearing I would lose control, I took hold of the iron headboard, it groaned within my grasp before the top of the bedpost snapped of in my grip. I quickly retreated to the bathroom to find my own release in fear that if I finished with my love that I would undoubtedly cause her harm.

When I returned, I realized that I hadn't been truly present to enjoy Bella's orgasm with her.

What we had shared had been mind blowing. Hearing and seeing the imitate moments the mated couples in my family shared through their thoughts were nothing compared to the charge I'd felt between Bella and me.

Bella was now covered with the bed sheet. Her cheeks were still colored from our intimate moment together. It was then that I caught sight of a familiar look in her dark eyes; she had something on her mind.

"Tell me, Bella, what's on your mind? Did you not enjoy our first round of practice?" I asked as I molded myself around her.

She shook her head at me.

"No, it's not that at all. I thought our first round of practice went rather well. It's just well…" she trailed off before continuing. "I know that you said that it would happen after graduation. However, I was thinking that maybe we should put my being changed up to a vote. I don't want to be some burden to your family so maybe they should have a say in it."

I chuckled lightly at Bella's words. "You won't be a burden, love. We all know what it is like to be a newborn. So there will be precautions taken to keep you safe."

She nodded in understanding. "I know that but, I'd still like to hear what they think. Giving them a choice in the matter only seems right after all the trouble I've been."

I smiled at her before blurting out my own question, "Marry me, Bella?"

She giggled at what she perceived as playful antics.

"No. Marriage at my age says I got knocked up."

I grinned into her skin, "Well, in my day it was the way to show one's good intentions."

She gave me a smile back in return. I then became curious.

"What would your answer be if we had conceived a child together?" I questioned baiting her.

"I suppose it would depend on how much we loved each other. I'd probably say no the first two times. Then wait to see if you were brave enough to ask a third time. After all third times a charm, right?"

I took this moment to kneel gently beside her. "Isabella Marie Swan, I promise to love and cherish you from now to the end of forever if you would do me the honor of becoming my wife."

The ring was already waiting in my hand to be slipped onto Bella's delicate finger. It was the third time I had asked...

"Yes, Edward, I'll marry you."

I was never as happy as I was in that moment when she finally said yes. I then remembered something that Rosalie had said to me a mere three days ago:

"_She going to say yes, you know, to all of your conditions. Bella loves you more then I though possible for a human to love one of us."_

It would seem that Rosalie had been right. Bella had just about given into all of my requests. I, however, still had my doubts of making love to her until after she had been changed. Especially, after I took note of the damage I had done to the banister rail, my wall, _and_ the iron headboard to our bed.

I was stuck in an impasse with myself. Question was, could my delay in changing her possibly end everything I had with Bella?

**A/N: Music on my playlist as I wrote this chapter: Needs by Collective Soul, I Melt & You by Rascal Flatts.**

**There is going to be an Epilogue so stay tuned. Everyone who has decided to give this twisted tale a try it mean so very much to me.**

**The Epilogue is all that is left.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


	18. Epilogue: Moving Forward

**Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Summary: **_Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after telling her he didn't want her any more. As she is lying on the cold forest floor; Bella remembers three important things. Edward made a promise not to leave her, and Edward never broke a promise, and third it was her body, her heart, what right did he have to decide what was good for her? All in all Bella realizes that Edward was covering up his true feeling about her. All in all Bella goes to bring Edward home._

**Epilogue: Moving Forward**

**Bella POV**

I had never expected Edward to offer to try his hand at foreplay with me. It took me two more weeks to convince him to try it again. In that time, I had forgotten to ask Edward's family about taking a vote on my change and becoming one of them. So taking matters into my own hands the next evening, as well as one of Edward's hands, I headed down the stairs on a mission. Edward followed me willingly down the stairs.

"Bella, there really is no need to do this," Edward said softly to me.

I, however, disagreed with him.

"Yes, there is, Edward. Your family deserves to have a say." I pressed.

Thanks to Alice everyone was already gathered in the living room. Edward continued to quietly argue with me.

"Bella, this is ridiculous. Come back upstairs with me."

I shook my head, and then gazed out across the room at each member of Edward's family.

"Even though my change was briefly discussed a few weeks ago, I thought it would only be fair to let each one of you have a say," I addressed them all.

I barely turned to Alice for her opinion, before she embraced me in a hug.

"Bella, you're my sister, so yes." Alice beamed at me.

I turned to Jasper next; he was doing his best to smile at me.

"I say yes as well. Even though I'm getting better with my control, it would be nice not to want to kill you all the time."

It was Rosalie's turn to speak next.

"Rosalie?"

She cleared her throat gently before answering me.

"I vote no. My vote doesn't have to do with not liking you. I'm grateful for what you have done for my brother. It's just it would have been nice for someone to vote no for me."

I smiled slightly at Rose and nodded my head. I was sure that Rosalie's reason for saying no had more to do with her circumstances than mine, so I didn't say anything else about it.

Emmett was standing next to Rosalie with an arm around her waist. It only seemed right to ask him next. He gave me one of his silly grins before turning serious again.

"I'm going to go with Rose and vote no. Sorry, Bells, I have to support my mate.

There was no way for me to be mad at Emmett. After all, if I had been in his shoes, I would have done the same.

My eyes found Esme's and she smiled at me before approaching and wrapping me it a gentle hug.

"Yes, you are already a daughter to me," she said happily.

"I suppose that just leaves my vote then," Carlisle sighed in the warm tone of his that I was becoming familiar with.

I couldn't stop the smile that graced my lips as I looked at the man who had become a second father to me. I nodded my head at him and waited.

Carlisle smiled gently back at me.

"Since Edward has decided not to live without you, my vote is yes. I never want to be so close to losing him again."

I was beaming. Edward's family wanted me to be apart of their lives. It's true that I already was apart of their lives, but that was only because I had been stubborn enough to chase after what I wanted - Edward. However, by asking the Cullens how they felt about me becoming part of their secret world, I learned that I was truly accepted.

Without even looking at him, I could feel Edward's eyes upon me. Turning my back to the other Cullens, I walked toward the landing of the stairs. My eyes met with Edward's tawny ones before flicking down to my engagement ring and then back to his eyes.

"With all of that said, Edward Anthony Cullen, which that just leaves you. Are you staying true to your word or are you going to go back on it?"

Edward just grinned at me at first giving me that lop-sided smile that I loved so much.

"Try as I might, I have never been able to escape the power you have over me. So I plan on doing my best at keeping true to _both_ of our conditions."

I didn't have a chance to react before Edward captured me in his arms and pulled me into a kiss so passionate that the world around us just melted away.

**A Week and a Half Later**

The Ides of March we're on us now and we were packing to head back to Forks.

When I had driven out of Forks five months ago, I hadn't expected to ever go back there yet here I was loading my things into Edward's Volvo S60R. So much had happened to me in those five months, and I knew I would never be the same.

At first, every day had been a battle to survive. Then as if it were a fairytale, everything had fallen into place. I now felt confident I had Edward right where I wanted him, with me for always.

"Do you have everything, Bella?"

The sound of Edward's velvet voice shook me from my thoughts.

"Um, yeah, I believe so. It would have been easier if Alice hadn't bought so much for me," I said as I sighed.

The look on my face must have been amusing because Edward chuckled at me.

"She wouldn't be Alice if she didn't, Love."

He had a very valid point and I grinned as I thought of something else.

"I guess it's a good thing that you're bulletproof."

"Why's that, Love?" Edward questioned.

"We still have to tell Charlie we're engaged."

There was no moving backward with us. We were moving forward, together.

**A/N: Playlist is a follows: We Can Go Anywhere & Right Where You Want Me by Jesse McCartney **

**This is the end of Lunar Eclipse. However if you are still wondering about Alice's vision, Victoria, graduation, the Wedding, Honeymoon, Newborns as well as some more twist, then come back this fall for the Sequel to Lunar Eclipse: STORM.**

**Thank you all so very much for picking to read and follow this story to its end and a new beginning.**

**And I love my beta very much…**

**Yes I do indeed, Thank you so very much Lisa for all you have done for me with this story. After all if not for Lisa I would have never posted this story.**

**TaintedDarkInuShemeeko**


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